greenspun.com : LUSENET : TB2K spinoff uncensored : One Thread

I thought it might be fun to revisit some of the more interesting pre-y2k threads from the old TB2000, starting with the topic "Funniest Threads".  So nominate your favorite threads.  To start this off, I always thought this one was funny.  (Yeah, I did start the thread, but the funniest stuff was posted by others).  And the threads don't actually have to be labled "humor", since some of the funniest (at least in retrospect) might have been posted as "serious" at the time.... Try to keep it short though, don't post the whole thread, just links and favorite quotes.

 You Know You're a Polly When..... and Y2K Prep List for Pollys (humor)

Here are some excerpts from the thread:

You know you're a polly when....
You actually read the links at www.garynorth.com

-- Hoffmeister (hoff_meister@my-deja.com), August 29, 1999.

You know you're a doomer when:
WalMart has lots of oil lamps (proves people are stocking up for the Big One)

WalMart has no oil lamps (proves people are stocking up for the Big One)

WalMart has as many oil lamps as always (proves the sheeple are ignorant and y2k will be that much worse)

The media warn of bad things coming (proves things will be bad)

The media say bad things aren't coming (proves the media are being manipulated by a panicking government)

The media ignore y2k (proves the media don't have a clue, so things will be very bad)

Your guru and hero is a pig farmer who's failed at everything he's tried and all his predictions have been wrong.

-- Flint (flintc@mindspring.com), August 29, 1999.

Uh, Flint, I know you're trying really hard, but the thread title is "You know you're a *polly* when...."

-- Elbow Grease (LBO Grise@aol.com), August 29, 1999.

Elbow Grease:
Sorry, let me try this again, OK?

You know you're a polly when:

WalMart has lots of oil lamps (proves people don't need them after all)

WalMart has no oil lamps (proves there's no demand for them)

WalMart has as many oil lamps as always (proves everything is normal)

The media warn of bad things coming (proves the hypesters are making money)

The media say bad things aren't coming (proves the media understand the real story)

The media ignore y2k (proves there's no problem after all)

Those whose hero is a pig farmer who's failed at everything he's tried and all his predictions have been wrong, have demonstrated a total inability to think their own thoughts anyway.

-- Flint (flintc@mindspring.com), August 29, 1999.

LOL! Now that *is* funny.

-- Elbow Grease (LBO Grise@aol.com), August 29, 1999.


-- FactFinder (FactFinder@bzn.com), April 15, 2000


For me, the all-time funniest thing I ever read on the board was the ferret story and the limerick that followed.

-- Daisy Jane (deeekstrand@access1.net), April 16, 2000.


I am putting together a little tribute to Russ Bigdog Lipton, sorta on the same lines as this! During my research, I came across some pretty funny threads....maybe I'll post the links here when I get the chance.

(one that comes to mind right away was posted by somebody else, but it sure was funny. The title says it all!)

Be sure to read "Dan the Power man" and "NERC to cover up" threads below. And can someone please tell me what the initials NERC stand for?


-- Old TB forum Regular (before Diane ran me off!) (but@not.the.one.that.runs.this.place), April 16, 2000.

lol OTBR-2, that was funny... And hey, I bet I would remember you if I saw the email address/pseudonym, you sure seem familiar!

-- FactFinder (FactFinder@bzn.com), April 16, 2000.

Any time a doomer made bold predicitions about "well I am a ten, but hoping for a BITR" it is funny, but nothing was quite as funny as the C4i series. Originally titled Paul Milne is a Polly the action went on for days and nights


-- QuietMan (quietjohn2k@hotmail.com), April 17, 2000.

Two of my favorites:

Advice on how to bathe a cat - OT - FRL #10 (washing Murhpy)

Spoof of PC error messages - HUMOR: Microsoft Haiku

-- David L (bumpkin@dnet.net), April 17, 2000.

I believe the Walmart Conspiracy was the FUNNIEST....after explaining what the Big Trucks were only used for lay aways, I got the flame bigtime.....still laughing.

-- consumer (shh@aol.com), April 17, 2000.

Consumer, got a link to the Walmart conspiracy thread? Or will I hafta search?

-- FactFinder (FactFinder@bzn.com), April 18, 2000.

I got the extra trucks confused with the white trucks, confused with the white signs. I don't know what to search for (there was no category for "utter lunacy"), but they're all essentially the same.

-- Flint (flintc@mindspring.com), April 18, 2000.

There were several Wal-Mart threads. Although I didn't see Consumer's name in the ones I found, he could have been under a different name. I'm sure there are more out there also.

Wal Mart Y2K sighting ?

What's up with the Walmart storage trailers thing?

Unusual sighting in Wal-Mart parking lot today, FWIW

Wal-Mart Trks carrying Signs ? ? ? (one of my favorites)

Storage containers at walmart


-- (hmm@hmm.hmm), April 18, 2000.

I nominate the FRL threads.

Fruitcake Index...

#0-A: Perfect y2k food? (not for the serious)
http://www.greenspun.com/bboard/q-and-a-fetch-msg.tcl?msg_id= 000FvD

#0-B: Supermarkets, Duct Tape, and Phone Gnomes (Humor)
http://www.greenspun.com/bboard/q-and-a-fetch-msg.tcl?msg_id= 000W78

#0-C: Grandmama's missing check
http://www.greenspun.com/bboard/q-and-a-fetch-msg.tcl?msg_id= 000GXB

#0-D: Who else got one of 10 Anti-terrorist "Units"?
(pre-beginnings of the Canadianainainan steath geeses thread)
http://greenspun.com/bboard/q-and-a-fetch-msg.tcl?msg_id= 000DfT

#1: Know Your Fruitcake! (not for the serious)
http://www.greenspun.com/bboard/q-and-a-fetch-msg.tcl?msg_id= 000Imj

#2: Know your Fruitcake, the second.
http://www.greenspun.com/bboard/q-and-a-fetch-msg.tcl?msg_id= 000hxd

#3: OT - Fruitcake III
http://www.greenspun.com/bboard/q-and-a-fetch-msg.tcl?msg_id= 000sez

#4: Know Your Fruitcake IV (not for the serious)
http://www.greenspun.com/bboard/q-and-a-fetch-msg.tcl?msg_id= 0011dm

#5: Fruitcake V : The Return of Sue?
http://www.greenspun.com/bboard/q-and-a-fetch-msg.tcl?msg_id= 001Bli

#6: OT- FRLians Unite, members only - OT
http://www.greenspun.com/bboard/q-and-a-fetch-msg.tcl?msg_id= 001Izu

#7: OT - FRL 7
http://www.greenspun.com/bboard/q-and-a-fetch-msg.tcl?msg_id= 001Oap

#8: OT - FRL 8
http://www.greenspun.com/bboard/q-and-a-fetch-msg.tcl?msg_id= 001P4r

#9: OT-FRL #9
http://www.greenspun.com/bboard/q-and-a-fetch-msg.tcl?msg_id= 001TU6

#10: OT - FRL #10 (washing Murhpy)
http://www.greenspun.com/bboard/q-and-a-fetch-msg.tcl?msg_id= 001ZPa

# 11: FRL # 11 - Lessons from the Geese
http://www.greenspun.com/bboard/q-and-a-fetch-msg.tcl?msg_id= 001gIB

# 12: FRL #12 - Natural Highs
http://www.greenspun.com/bboard/q-and-a-fetch-msg.tcl?msg_id= 001lYX

-- (Fruitcake@Resistance.League), April 19, 2000.

no-one has mentioned my y2k songs and limericks (sniff sob) anyone got the links

-- richard (richard.dale@onion.com), April 19, 2000.

y2k song

-- (LOL@Y2k.humor), April 19, 2000.

Fact, Sorry I dont have a link, I havent learned the fine art of computing yet. (snicker) $2,800.00 Anniversary present for hubby and I NEED a computer course....all i can do is type.

But, let me fill you in. I "may" have posted under another name, but I cant recall.

Walmart, big debate upon what the trucks were there for. Many believed it was for the government to shut down the roads and such, many views on the 'trucks' parked in back..

While I contacted a friend who worked for Walmart in Florida, she told me the trucks were in FACT (no pun intended smile) for the layaways at christmas because there were soooo many.

While I posted the REAl reason the 'Conspiracy Trucks" were there, I got FLAMED big time. Oh I didnt know what I was talking about, I'm an idiot, you know, same ol, same ol. LOL. Although I explained that my friend kept TRACK of what was in 'the conspiracy' Trucks via a computer, I was shunned blasted and told off.

Some even asked for proof other than she said she said.

Now HOW in the world was i going to prove that? Bottom line, I was right.

Consumer who is basking in the TRUTH......sorry again about no link, I promise i'll sign up for the computer class soon. Bought hubby a typing tutor yesterday....He is now up to 28 wpm. Bless his typing lil heart.

-- consumer (shh@aol.com), April 19, 2000.

I linked a few of the Wal-Mart threads I could find up above. Perhaps your comments were among them.

-- (hmm@hmm.hmm), April 19, 2000.

Those containers sure caused quite a fit,

Wal-Mart had to be up to bad shit,

Was it food, was it guns,

Was it hamburger buns?

It was just lay-a-ways for Old Git.

-- Ra (tion@l.1), April 19, 2000.

Consumer, I agree that the Walmart truck threads were funny, I don't remember which Doomsters participated, but I think the twits from cascadia were front and center.

My pick for funniest post was from this guy...

This is just too important to let one or two people shut me up. Here is my post my warning to all! Please take heed!

Shut down all appliances. Trip the breaker to your house. When the GPS system crashes at midnight power is going start fluctuating. Without proper synchronazation, there will be meltdowns and rolling brownouts/blackouts!

Batten down the hatches, the roughest ride in history begins at the stroke of twelve!

Tempest (in@tea.pot), August 21, 1999

Doesn't this guy sound like hawk?

-- Y2K Pro (y2kpro1@hotmail.com), April 19, 2000.

No, Pro. It does not sound like Hawk.

-- FutureShock (gray@matter.think), April 19, 2000.

My vote for the funniest goes to the C4i posts. Diane was practically panting on C4i and its companion, the Naval Graduate School guy (wow, I can't even remember his name).

-- Maria (anon@ymous.com), April 19, 2000.

Diane and the Naval War College.


-- (something@for.Maria), April 20, 2000.

Doesn't this guy sound like Y2KPro?

"Boy am I ever a dumb fucking piece of shit. I really should pull my head out of my ass and get a brain, but I'm even too fucking stupid to do that. Besides, I like eating my own crap, it tastes good."

-- Hawk (flyin@high.again), April 20, 2000.

Yep, sure sounds like Y2KPro to me!

-- (that's.him@for.sure), April 20, 2000.

Nah, gimme a few minutes, I can dig some really funny shit up.....

-- lisa (lisa@work.now), April 20, 2000.


-- Debra (Hermes@Mercury.com), April 20, 2000.

Actually Hawkey it sounds just like YOU,

The same kind of words that often you spew.

Your mind is a trap,

For all sorts of crap,

Bottom feeder is you through and through!

-- Ra (tion@l.1), April 20, 2000.

Speakin of trucks


watch out for redlof

-- imme (¿¿¿??@greenspun.com), January 21, 2003.

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