About 5 years ago my husband and I married in a civil ceremony. Both of us are Catholic. Soon after the marriage I deeply regretted the fact that our marriage was not blessed by the Church. Finally, here we are, about to get out marriage blessed. Before we left our meeting with the priest, he casually informed us we could not have "relations." I left with a few questions and so got online and came across some information the priest did not tell me, such as, I can not recieve the sacraments until the marriage is blessed. Is this the truth?

-- Bonnie P. (bap4527@charter.net), December 01, 2004

Answers

If you confess your relationship to date, which according to Church teaching is cohabitation without benefit of marriage, and follow your priest's appropriate instruction to avoid sexual relations until you are actually married, then you would be able to receive the sacraments. However, if you continue to participate in marital relations without benefit of the sacrament of marriage, you should not receive the Eucharist, since such activity would constitute an ongoing, unrepentant state of serious sin.

While the phrase "having your marriage blessed" is commonly used in such situations, your priest should have explained to you that from the Church's perspective there is actually no marriage to "bless". What you actually will be doing is receiving the sacrament of matrimony, thereby marrying each other in the Church.

-- Paul M. (PaulCyp@cox.net), December 01, 2004.