Life's Little Mysteries

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Why are yawns contagious?

Why do people like the smell of their own farts, but the smell of other people's make them want to barf?

Why is it whenever I'm on the subway, some big fat slob has to sit near me, and why are they always in need of a bath?

Why can't I have all the free morphine I want, whenever I want it?

Why is it whenever I talk about jacking off all over myself, people become offended?

Why is it after I'm done taking a poop, I feel like I have to wipe my butt again about 15 minutes later, even though I'm sure all that paperwork was done before I left the bathroom?

These are just a few of the mysteries that confound me on a daily basis. I'm hoping you will help reveal some of the answers for me. Thank you for you time.

-- Homie Simpson (HomieSimpson@homersimpson.com), September 08, 2004

Answers

The big mystery here is "Why are you here?"

-- (no@spam.com), September 15, 2004.

Because he can be, you sniveling little fag!

-- HoHum (hohum@aol.com), September 17, 2004.

Look who's talking: A dumbass without a fucking clue

-- (Your@Mom.com), September 18, 2004.

Look who's talking: A dumbass without a fucking clue.

-- (Your@Mom.com), September 18, 2004.

Look! Two lemmings that write the exact same lemming thing! What a shock!

-- HoHum (HoHum@aol.com), September 18, 2004.


Shut the fuck up, ass-ranchers!

He's a butt cowboy
He's a butt cowboy
just a western queer
who takes it in the rear
saddlin' up with this rugged rump ranger
"Don't you mind, never fucked no stranger,"


-- kasjdflkasjf;lashfv;asl (fsdafasfsadfasdf@fajsdfasd.dfasdfa), September 18, 2004.

Tard, sounds like it's time to UP your Prozac. PS Don't forget the Lithium as well.

-- tardbusters (www.tard@busters.org), September 25, 2004.

Yes do that: SHUT THE FUCK UPkasjdflkasjf;lashfv;asl AKA: homie

-- Shut the fuck up (shut@thefuckup.goof), October 14, 2004.

Stfu, do the rest of the board a favor....FUCK OFF AND DIE!!!

-- (aint@tellinYOU.com), October 15, 2004.

Here's a new one: Why do the KOBE's suck so damn much?

-- Anti-bush (Comrade_bleh@hotmail.com), October 15, 2004.


They just can't help but suck!

-- Shut the fuck up (shut@thefuckup.goof), October 15, 2004.

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