Is physical abuse grounds for an annulment?

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I am a non catholic but was raised catholic and attended catholic school. I do not believe I was ever babtized because I was adopted. I am presently with a wonderful man who is catholic and we want to be married in the catholic church. Here is the question, I was previously married and had a child, my ex husband is not catholic and we were not married in a church. When we seperated he became violent one night and almost killed me, threatened to kill me, and said he would kill our child. I have a police report and pictures from this incident which occured 10 years ago. Do I have to have an anullment? And also, are these substantial grounds for an immediate anullment. thank you

-- Amber Kay (amberlynn72@hotmail.com), March 19, 2003

Answers

Response to Is physical abuse grounds for an anullment?

Hi Amber,

I am sad that you had such a terrible experience. My mother went through a similar situation when I was just three years old; she was pregnant of my sister.

However, you should notice that “annulment” is not a “catholic divorce”. In fact, marriage is indissoluble; it is the nature of marriage that makes it indissoluble, not the Church's will. Jesus specifically ruled out divorce and remarriage.

What is frequently called “annulment” is actually a process of “declaration of nullity”, which means that, after a rigorous investigation, the Church may find that the marriage never occurred at all. So, what matters is the conditions when you married, not what happened afterwards.

If one of the spouses is a baptized Catholic, marriage must take place before an authorized Church witness (usually a priest), otherwise it is invalid (i.e. id does not occur). So, if you were baptized AND your first marriage did NOT take place in the Catholic Church, most probably that marriage never took place at all, so a declaration of nullity would probably be granted.

On the other hand, if both spouses are not catholic, the Church assumes the marriage to be valid, unless it can be shown that those conditions necessary for a valid marriage were not present.

These conditions are many, and it is a bit complicated to explain all that here. So, I advise you to look for a good priest who may help you and explain to him your entire situation. In any case, you will have to investigate and be sure if you were baptized or not.

God Bless You.

-- Atila (me@somewhere.com), March 20, 2003.


Response to Is physical abuse grounds for an anullment?

Hi Amber,

I can’t agree with what Nina had to say and I agree with most of what Atila had to say. Nina seems sure with what little bit of information you have supplied us that a decree of nullity will not only be “granted” but that it will be granted “immediately”. I wish I were that optimistic. Unfortunately for Nina, the Church doesn’t work that quickly. Fortunately for others like yourself, the Church will proceed methodically and deliberately to discover if in fact, a marriage has ever properly taken place. I have seen the Church take up to seven years, in some countries, to reach a decision on such a matter. In Canada, it is normal for a decision to be given, on average, in about one and a half years. I am not sure this sort of time frame would qualify under Nina’s definition of “immediately” and I would not want you to be given the false impression this matter can be cleared up in a matter of a few short days or weeks.

As I have said, I agree with Atila in most of what he has said. However, in saying, “So, what matters is the conditions when you married, not what happened afterwards.” he may not be quite accurate or complete. You see, often it is evidence or circumstances that come to light (for example - physical abuse) after a couple has been “married” that one or both participants were not aware of at the time of the “marriage” that can often be grounds for the Church declaring a decree of nullity.

Canon 1095 states (in part), “The following are incapable of contracting marriage: ... those who suffer from a grave lack of discretionary judgment concerning the essential matrimonial rights and obligations to be mutually given and accepted; those who, because of causes of a psychological nature, are unable to assume the essential obligations of marriage.” These are only a few ways in which a decree might be granted based on circumstances similar to what you’ve described surrounding your first marriage.

I am in complete agreement with Atila though, when he suggests to seek out a priest for guidance in this matter. He will be able to direct you properly in the way in which you should proceed.

-- Ed Lauzon (grader@accglobal.net), March 20, 2003.


Response to Is physical abuse grounds for an anullment?

Yes, Ed, the "hidden vice" (vício oculto) is actually ground for a decree of nullity. But I have thought of it as something that was really a condition at the time of marriage, only it is not known at that time.

So, we are in perfect agreement since the beginning :-)

God Bless.

-- Atila (me@somewhere.com), March 20, 2003.


Response to Is physical abuse grounds for an anullment?

Although I don¹t like John¹s usual self-righteous attitude, he is almost always orthodox and doctrinally correct, especially in Canon Law and sexual moral matters. He derails himself sometimes in matters where our faith is in opposition to the ideology of the Republican Party of America (as is his opposition to the pope on the war issue), of which he is a staunch supporter. Sometimes these are not very serious errors, but sometimes they are (as in the war case).

However, this is not the case in this thread. Matrimonial Canon Law is certainly one of his best specialties.

God Bless.

-- Atila (me@somewhere.com), March 20, 2003.


Response to Is physical abuse grounds for an anullment?

Nina, in the case at hand, you may have misread John’s other post. Quick processes usually happen when at least one of the spouses is a baptized catholic and they only are married in civil marriage (not having married in the Church). In this case, there is no marriage at all, so the process can be quick. There’s simply not much investigation to be done.

In the case of Amber, none being catholic, the Church assumes the marriage to be valid. So, a full investigation is warranted.

God Bless.

-- Atila (me@somewhere.com), March 20, 2003.



Response to Is physical abuse grounds for an anullment?

Jmj

Atila, I almost started to spend some time telling you how obnoxious you were to bring your irrelevant and non-factual comments about my political and war-related positions into this thread.

But then I decided that it would be better to spend these minutes letting you know that you and Ed L were victims of a "ruse" on this thread. (And it is not the only thread on which good people have been victimized by people who are enjoying their abusive behavior.) The following are all the same person, or part of the small group of people, who have been trying to wreck the forum in recent weeks (first via obscenities and racism, but now in more subtle ways):
Amber Kay
Nina Sternick
Elle Mcpherson
Peter Hoger

These people are posting thread after thread (or adding message after message to old threads) about marriage/divorce/nullity. All their little tales of woe are fictional and are designed to cause good Catholics to waste time explaining the same things over and over again. This action is the work of evil spirits who have infested the forum, or they are "human minions of satan," folks who have sold their souls. Please do not let yourself be deceived by them again.

You can contact me by private e-mail if you want to know how I know that these "people" are phony.

God bless you.
John

-- J. F. Gecik (jfgecik@hotmail.com), March 20, 2003.


Response to Is physical abuse grounds for an anullment?

Hi John,

Thanks for the alert.

In fact, I had noticed that these "annulment threads" were on a rise.

If you don’t mind, I decided to forego our discussion about the war. We both posted our views and I think people can read both and think it out for themselves. This (literal) “war effort” if demanding more time than my responsibilities permit.

However, if you prefer to discuss it, we may do so provided that we can remain civil (what is not easy sometimes). Anyway, I don’t think anyone of us will be able to change positions out of it. And, as I have said, I should have reduced my time here since at least Sunday. Only I am so sad with this war that I am not able to sleep. I wish I don’t come to sleep deprivation.

I hope you will forgive me some offensive things I may have said about you. But you must understand my sadness and you may want to admit that you have been calling me unjust names for some time.

I’ll try to learn with Kiwi and Mateo how be more “relaxed”. Not with you, of course :-)

God Bless

-- Atila (me@somewhere.com), March 20, 2003.


Response to Is physical abuse grounds for an anullment?

Atila writes:

"I’ll try to learn with Kiwi and Mateo how be more “relaxed”. Not with you, of course :-) "

I think the solution is that we four should all go down to New Zealand, find some quiet beach, have some margaritas, and spend some quality time pondering life. What do you think, Kiwi? Doesn't that sound therapeutic?

BTW, I'd say we meet in Brazil; but for the sake of my marriage, I think that one visit during my single days is enough for me! ;-)

God bless each of you.

Mateo

-- (MattElFeo@netscape.net), March 21, 2003.


Response to Is physical abuse grounds for an anullment?

You seem to have given no grounds for an annulment. Certainly violence after a separation is not a ground. You can not be with a wonderful catholic man if he is living with you. Your situation is a scandal. You have no business living with a man, who is not your spouse, particularly if you have a child from what is PRESUMED to be a valid marriage. You may seek a declaration of nullity but most tribunals are not faithful to the Church teachings, despite American Catholic protestations otherwise. The Rota is the one tribunal where you are "likely" to get a just decision but that is an appeals court of second instance, unless you live in Italy (I believe). I am not your judge but I have and continue to be the brunt of the Catholic Church's assault on marriage and I speak the truth. Please separate from the man you are living with, you are a scandal to me, if what you are saying is as it seems. You should not even be dating him, period. You should not refer to your husband as ex, that is not true. It encourages divorce, which is acceptable in clearly defined and limited situations. Such talk does grave damage to marriage. It harms you, society and your child.

-- Karl (parkerkajwen@hotmail.com), March 21, 2003.

Response to Is physical abuse grounds for an anullment?

Did you come to Brazil, Mateo? Great!

But I Would prefer to go to NZ also!

Let's see if Kiwi invites us. :-)

God Bless.

-- Atila (me@somewhere.com), March 21, 2003.



Response to Is physical abuse grounds for an anullment?

Everyone who is against jfgecik on this forum is the same person with the others... Good reasoning from JF Gecik, once again. This sick man...

-- Peter (PeterHoger@hotmail.com), March 22, 2003.

Response to Is physical abuse grounds for an anullment?

ATila it would be an honour, New Zealand it is then gentlemen!

-- Kiwi (csisherwood@hotmail.com), March 22, 2003.

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