I want to help my sister & nephew

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My sister is in a very abusive relationship, and I don't know if she is aware of it. Her boyfriend loses it all the time. He's also on drugs too. And know she is also doing drugs to. And it's like he has complete control over her life. She's at the point where she treats all her family like trash. And when he hits her she calls us crying all the time. But then he always manipulates her to do the things he says and ends up back with her. I think he's got it in her mind that she's lost without him. Then they have a 8 year-old son. He's the sweetest boy, And he has to deal with this all on his own. He basically tunes them out, and when she is getting beat, he acts as if nothing is going on. I'm worried that my nephew is a little traumatized by what is going on at home. Her boyfriend has done some pretty awful things to her. He's went as far as hitting her in the head with a hammer, to ripping her clothes off because she didn't want to give him her money, to trying to smother here with a plastic bag, to choking her, to beating her up in front of the supermarket. And during all this my nephew is there seeing all this. And the story goes on. But I'm worried about the both of them. No one can truly love someone that much to stay with after everything he has done. I know cause I got out of that kind of situation, and now I see the effect on my kids. I'm addressing that now before my children end as an abusive husband/father or my daughter ends up as an abused woman or the abuser.I'm getting off the subject now, but I want to know what I can do to try and help. If she don't want the help what can I do to help my nephew?

-- Anonymous, February 25, 2003


I know this is going to sound harsh and not what you want to hear but you have a duty to your little nephew to get him out of there. PLEASE try to get your sister help, encourage her, help her to realise what is happeneing. If she still doesn't see it, point out that her little boy has to witness this and it will affect his growth SO MUCH. If she still refuses to seek help, you need to go to the police and get the child inot care, I know it sounds cruel but it is for the best, are you sure his Dad isn't beating him too? Good luck and please keep in touch, jennielaban@hotmail.com xx

-- Anonymous, May 27, 2003

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