It's officially official. The Sharp Family Circus will be arriving Chicago on Sept. 14 at 3:45 in the afternoon, and won't return until they've had their fill of their father's odd collection of friends and acquaintances( or until Saturday the 21, whichever comes first). I'm assuming that we will still be reunioning in Elkhart, the city of brotherly love, and the place where Sir Chip Clup first dazzled audiences with his breathtaking portrayal of T.N. Sympathy. For those of you who have not yet made your bookings, talk about inexpensive airfare, Wow, boy howdy. I'm assuming too that the dates remain the Monday and Tuesday thing. How far is Elkhart from Michigan City? Looking forward to this. I hope it's not just you and me, Craig, but I'm sure we'll limp along.

-- Anonymous, July 28, 2002

Answers

Dwell, I still have it perkolating. I know that is the first step to procastinating, but hey, ya gotta start somewhere. I think I can, I think I can.

-- Anonymous, July 30, 2002

Hooray! Michigan City is pretty much between Chicago and Elkhart, probably an hour either way. Gilly?? Are you still coming down for the marriage? The more Pigz the merrier!

Been busy contatcting my High School teachers so I can set up a question and answer session during the Chip Clup Birthplace Tragical History Tour.

Actually, I apologize for my recent lack of communicoring, been going thru a refinance (2nd time in 2 years, but soooo worth it!) And am in continuing negotiations with the Dell Computer Corporation to have them Kiss My Ass! Do not under any circumstances buy from Dell! There, that should have cost them another $4000.00 dollars or so.

-- Anonymous, August 02, 2002

...it is in the works. Man, Andy, how in the world can you plan a road trip so responsibly??? I'll be there, unless something wierd happens and I'm not supposed to make it. It's an incredibly uphill battle, but I think we may actually find a way...now there's just this matter of paying for it...? I've got four weeks to come up with the dough, maybe we could put on a show!!!! I've got a friend with a newly renovated gymnasium...with a stage!! We could get the pews from the church and, well, gee Andy, I think this might work!! (big kiss) [that of course is Andy Rooney...wait, I mean Mickey Rooney. Why was I kissing Mickey Rooney? Hard to say really.) Geepers, ain't this grand??? I bet the whole town will come out....(Andy Rooney's coming out??)

Good night, Tim. Good night, John Boy. (Good night, Andy).

-- Anonymous, August 03, 2002

Scary thing: I've actually kissed Mickey Rooney. On stage, on the forehead. Kind of a combination of sweat and sandpaper. Still, I hear he's better than Andy Rooney.

-- Anonymous, August 03, 2002

As I was reading these missives, I started to get excited. The Pigs, getting together?! Too much to believe. Shortness of breath, sweaty palms, and then talk of kissing Mickey Rooney. Now I just feel sick.

-- Anonymous, August 05, 2002

Didn't we make Marmar kiss Mickey Rooney??

-- Anonymous, August 06, 2002

Now this is getting exciting. Responsibly planning a road trip. I know... I know... I don't know if it's my anal retentive side coming through or if it's just from so many years of being a dad or what. I think I should leave the retention of anii up to other members of our group (Did I ever tell you about the gay architect roommate I had at Yale trying to convince Marmar that he was gay and just didn't realize it? Allow me to add at this point that yes it's true, while I was at Yale I was visited by but ONE Party Pig. I'm just glad it wasn't Clayton) I digress. To further entertain my compulsive nature, I am arranging accomodations for this flying circus of mine. It feels like I can safely make reservations in Elkhart for Monday and Tuesday night. What think you, Chipper? Has the Entertainment coordinator for the Two Days and Nights of Clup Tour arranged for discount lodging and meal coupons? We're staying downtown Chicago Saturday and Sunday. A last bit of menutia: Tim has been hanging around here for a while and I was hoping he would join us. But ever since September 11, he's been afraid of air travel. Any way you can have him join you in Chicago, Craig? I imagine he's not afraid of visiting a gay disco from time to time. Let me know. Looking forward to this thing, gang.

-- Anonymous, August 06, 2002

Marmar wasn't gay, he was an actual penis with a shirt on. (Now, Gilly...) Whatever.

Ok, here's the possibilities from my end. I'll be taking a class on Tuesdays and Thursdays right about then, so I'll be checking out on Tuesday morning, but Monday and Monday night are a go-go, if the money rolls in jusssst right.

Now, Sunday night might be doable, too, if anyone is interested...

Ain't this fun???

Everybody put a psychic whammy on Rich, or better yet, give him a call...Teej and I have already put the strongarm on him, who's next??

-- Anonymous, August 09, 2002

Didn't we make Laurie Sparrow stand on a chair and spell "Mickey Rooney"?

Tim and I haven't spoken in many, many years, and the LAST place I'd want to see him is in my bar! I may be able to find some of his acquaintences tho.

I can make it to Elkhart as early as 10pm Sunday or so. Where are you staying Gilly? Do you know yet? My folks house is near the #92 Elkhart exit off of the I80/90 toll road if that helps anyone.

-- Anonymous, August 12, 2002

Am I right in understanding that Gilly intends to drive from Elkhart to backhome@backwoods.NC in one day just to make it to class on time?!! What class is this? We have all of us come a long way since those deer-gone days. I was just thinking that it's been 11 years since I last saw Gilly in person. Could this be true? We will be at the aquarium on sunday. Come join us. Is there a kid-friendly park near your folks' home, Chip? I've got reservations at 3011 Belvedere Rd. that I can cancel if they're in the next county. Please advise. COME ON RICH!!! Tim wants to know if he can send a care package to you in the mail. I'm wondering if that's silly. Love you guys. Tick tock. COME ON RICH!!

-- Anonymous, August 12, 2002

That hotel should be fine, which one is it? there's a whole cluster of shit in that area. I'm going home thursday for Mom's birthday so I'll check out things to keep the kiddys happy, what is their age range again?

Gilly, what is your situation? are you gonna have the family?

TJ, are you still trying to make it?

Rich, did Clayton get to you and turn you against us?

-- Anonymous, August 13, 2002

Never mind Andy, a quick internet search shows you're at the Ramada. Great location. My brother's wedding rehearsal dinner was there a few years back, but that's all I know about it. I'll get more info on Thursday. What was your rate if I may ask. Maybe we can get something better.

-- Anonymous, August 13, 2002

No, I'm not driving back in one day...but I am driving up in one day!!! I just can't afford to stay out of town from Friday through the following Thursday...no workee, no monee. (We'll be stopping Tuesday night and getting home on Wednesday.) If we stay Tuesday night we won't get in until Thursday and I don't know that I'd feel up to a class after the drive...

Yepper chipper, will have family in tow. We'll be in Goshen Saturday night and Sunday night, (unless you guys want to hook up on Sunday night as well). As far as rooms, I'll vote for inexpensive (is this a theme, or what?) as long as there's a pool... my kiddies never get to go swimming unless it's in a river, so a pool's a must at a hotel. Does the Ramada have one? You had mentioned the Weston Plaza. Bren went online and didn't find any putt-putt there, but there was a pool. My kids are 7, 5, and 18 months. Rich is unfortunately off-line right now since he quit his job and that was his access to the net. Pick up the phone and give him a call...we know he's not busy if he's unemployed, right? Gee whiz, Paula knows us, so she's just got to let him go, right?

Where's the aquarium?? Chi-town? If so it's prolley too much of a haul for us, since we'll be chalking up 24 hours of driving the crew around just to get there and back. Sounds like fun, though. The class is a prep class for the contractor's license test here. I don't know if I'll get my license or not, but I thought it would be good to see if I could even pass the test if I wanted to. I thought it might be fun, someday, to be the fat guy that drives the pickup around all day instead of the fat guy who does all the hard work...

As of right now we're planning on being there. If we're abducted by aliens or M. Night Shyamalan shows up at our place we'll take it as a supernatural hint that we shouldn't go. Anything short of an act of God, though and we'll be there!!!!

-- Anonymous, August 13, 2002

Whooopeeeee!!! The Ramada does have a pool, and the rate is $80.10/night, about as good as anyhting with a pool in the area. My kids are 6,4,3,2. The aquarium is in Chitown, where we'll be staying Sunday night. We're at the Ramada mon and tues, then off to Michigan City. Kate might take one of those days to spend some one on one with her gramma, so I'd be stuck, vehicleless and carseatless (x4), which is why I'm wondering about parks nearby, etc. Maybe we could just set up that day at the Ramada poolside, and make nuisances of ourselves. I'm trying to talk my brother in law into making the trip. He is definitely of Party Pig material, and could give Tim a ride. TJ, are you driving? Wish I could make that trip with you. Love you guys.

-- Anonymous, August 14, 2002

Ok, here's my idea: I'm thinking of getting a room at the Ramada myself, that way we can have a place to "reunionize" without having to worry about getting kicked out of a bar or being seen intoxicated in front of the kiddies. I guess the Ramada is as nice as anything around there and they do have an indoor/outdoor pool. I'll try to stop by there tomorrow and check it out.

Andy, where are you staying in Chicago? I work at the bar from 1-7 and would love to have you drop by and see it at least. Maybe we can ride together to Elkhart if that would help so Kate can have the car and hit Michigan City.

Things are pretty open, so let me know what I can do to help.

Think of anything else you might want to know about the area before I leave thursday morning (around 10am)

-- Anonymous, August 14, 2002

Too surreal. I miss a few days and things start to gel. Okay. Pressure is on. I'll check out flights and Ramada prices. Tim ain't around and I barely have airfare for me. Mucho sorry. You guys realize I would never do this for anyone but ya'll.

-- Anonymous, August 14, 2002

OK, here's more good news, looks like I'm off that Saturday the 14th (still have to work Sunday) so I'm free to get together with anyone who's in town. What are your plans for Saturday Andy?

P.S. Northwestern's playing Duke that day. . .tickets are easy to come by. . .

-- Anonymous, August 14, 2002

Just a thought...Master Clup, see about getting a block of rooms together since the parental types won't want to leave the kiddies too far away...

Teej, I think you can, I think you can...I knew you would!!! Now we all need to call Rich every ten minutes and bug him till we piss him off enough to come!! I figure I'll call about three tomorrow morning. WAKE UP PIG-BOY!!!!!! Whaddaya think?

Anderson, will we get to see Kate on Monday??? I'm gonna be sad if I miss her! We'll be there with some sort of rental mini-van, so if need be we can ferry folks around to park-like activities on Monday. (But taking over the pool sounds great to me!!)

-- Anonymous, August 14, 2002

We haven't firmed up when and if Kate is heading solo to Michigan City, but I'll make sure she gets to see you, Gilly. It's been many years. Remember that picture you took of us dancing around the RV pyre? It still hangs in the shop. My reservations at the Ramada are changeable/cancellable if we want to move us around. A block of rooms is a great idea. But we need a place to picnic and barbecue too, eh? Did you scope nearby parks? Where's the tour director, that bitch! This whole Clup tour seems pretty amateurishly run. You'd think that after the revenues generated by last season's record breaking volume (Remember the Chip Bobblehead dolls?) that they would have gotten somebody with some moxie in there to hussle all the bluehairs around to all the points of interest. I'd love to check out the bar. Saturday and Sunday night we're springing for the Hampton Inn at 33 W. Illinois (I threw darts at suites in downtown, hope I did ok.) This is our first real vacation in a couple of years, so we're going to have 2 nights in Chitown. Well, 2 nights in a room in Chicago. We'll do the aquarium thing Sunday morning, and try to get a nap for the kids in the afternoon. I might be able to slip away then for a drink at the bar. Is there good dancing? If Tim comes with us, and we can find a sitter for the kids, It would be great to get out just the two of us, but I don't know how we would swing it. Anyway, looking forward to it. 1 month..

-- Anonymous, August 15, 2002

Due to the events of September 11, many cutbacks were made to the "Chip Clup Tragical Piss Hairy Tour" out of necessity. We apologize for this temporary setback and hope your enjoyment of the whole "experience" won't be diminished. The official Tour Soundtrack; "The Sounds of Clup" will be available early 2003 - featuring an all new Bonus Track; "Creaking Knees"

I checked with Mom and she doesn't know of any kiddy parks within walking distance, but it's a short drive to Island Park which is very nice. A Monday cookout sounds like a good idea! There's a grocery store near the hotel (I guess the hotel restaurant is now a Bennigans, my how the hamlet of my youth has burgeoned).

Anyway, I'll get lots of info today. As far as putting our rooms together, I'm sure that won't be a problem. I can give them a call a coupla weeks beforehand. Hotels usually don't assign rooms much before the arrival date. Besides, it's still fairly small.

When do you get into Chicago on Saturday Andy? You may be kidnapped, just a thought. Your hotel is right by an "El" stop so we will probably be seeing you sometime that day! Woo Hoo!

-- Anonymous, August 15, 2002

We are into O'Hare at 3:45 p.m., Gods willing. I'll talk to Kate about plans, expectations etc. I don't think it's out of the realm of possibility to imagine that one of the 2 nights I, or we, will be able to get away. Kate has never been too into the idea of hooking up the kids with babysitters in foreign cities, even when set up by trusted friends, so it'll probably be a me, as opposed to a we, but I'll try. I'd love to dance to gay-boy disco in a chic city like Chi- town, but it would have to be with someone of the opposite sex (most times) and hopefully with someone as sexy as my Lady K. Anyway. Maybe we'll run into you guys in the airport. Is Bruce coming to the reunion? Got kids melting down here. Gotta go.

-- Anonymous, August 15, 2002