A contributor of this BBS...................

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

Answers

A Proposal...............perhaps?

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

Well it's not me, so there's only another 99 to eliminate.

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

uh uh... no me either

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

And if it's not Gus, that only leaves 97. Any takers?

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

And i only have one every ten years now...

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

I don't think we'll pursue that Gav. Maybe on another thread. So then there were 96.

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

Person is a male so count out Ciara, dougal, Jacko, Galaxy, Yellie, Steph, Lynda, Wendy, Screacher,

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

88 left then (or 87 if you include Screach)

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

Not me either. Did someone propose to Maureen - hence the previous post ;-)

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

This is not a wind up, other than not mentioning the name. It is up to the person concerned to announce it, if they want too that is!!

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

Bit late now Gus, cat's out of the bag. We'll pursue this to the biter end. 85.

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

Make that bitter.

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

I'll have a bitter too, thanks.

Must be one of the aussie gang. Perhaps Nigel's gone for option f and proposed to his manager?

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

Not necessarily Pete, my company operates in OZ, UK, France, Spain, US and occassionally Japan!

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

Hiro?

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

Not me, though it's our first wedding anniversary on the 25th

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

Howay man - give us a clue........say - which country?

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

Oh and my guess is Sting....

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

It's me! I'VE WON THE BLIDDY LOTTERY!! YYEESSSSSS!!!!

Erm, no I haven't actually. Count me out then :-(

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

So, it's not the two Andy's (could be a good name for a comedy double act - speak to Dan). That's 83 then.

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

Deffo not me - only 82 left.

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

...or me...

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

81 then

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

I'm off home. Hopefully the guilty party will unveil themselves by the time I log on again.

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

Don't tell me one of the wimmin has managed to reverse into a parking spot! Hat, coat, exit......Whoosh.

It's not me either.

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

Right, home now. That's us down to 80.

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

count me oot, couldn't win a raffle if I was the only bastad in it. 79 and counting, make that 78 since I have split personalities

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

Congratulations are due to Gus. He got it right - it's not me. (tho perhaps his perverse logic is, well just like him, perverse).

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

My missus has told me it's not me.

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

So thats only 77 left I think

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

It's not me so it must be Swifty in Barcelona... phoenix

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

Not me. Not Swift. We're both engaged already although, I hasten to add, not to each other. Big strapping lad and all that but, err...no thanks...

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

Hmmmm. Wedding anniversary was last week so not me. Kegsy?

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

Come on gus, it's 4am. here, and it certainly ain't me - spill the beans marra!?

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

Not me nope defo

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

That's 71. Come in Tokyo.

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

Come on Gus........give it up! I`m dying to know now! (:o)

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

well I don't even know where me local church is, so it couldn't be me ...

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

Not guilty.

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2002

Tokyo calling, sorry it's not me. Come on Gus, spit it oot

-- Anonymous, May 09, 2002

I know who it is. And I'm not telling either. It's not my place to say. Funny how word gets round. Ha ha.

-- Anonymous, May 09, 2002

Howay Nick there should be nae whispering in the back of the class with Gus. Spill the beans man the suspense is killing us ....

-- Anonymous, May 09, 2002

I don't expect Nick really knows, you know how he likes to be in every clique.

Some personality disorder I suppose, hes not a Makem is he?

-- Anonymous, May 09, 2002

Perth isn't too far for me to come over and administer a slap.

-- Anonymous, May 09, 2002

Well i've not had a shag for this year so it cannit be me.

-- Anonymous, May 09, 2002

67 left. And the day is young. Anyone out there got any suggestions or helpful chat up lines for Min?

-- Anonymous, May 09, 2002

Fancy a fuck pet? is usually a good ice breaker...

-- Anonymous, May 09, 2002

I was waiting for one of your classics Gav. 'Got any Geordie in you?' usually gets the same response.

-- Anonymous, May 09, 2002

Seems to me the only one left is wor ol mate Sting. Howay bonny lad spills the beans.

-- Anonymous, May 09, 2002

Found these yesterday. :o))

AUSTIN POWERS PICK-UP LINES

1. I wish you were a door so I could slam you all day long. 2. (Lick finger and wipe on her shirt)....Let's get you out of these wet clothes. 3. Nice legs...what time do they open? 4. Do you work for UPS? I thought I saw you checking out my package. 5. You've got 206 bones in your body, want one more? 6. Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money? 7. I may not be the best looking guy in here, but I'm the only one talking to you. 8. I'm a bird watcher and I'm looking for a Big Breasted Bed Thrasher,have you seen one? 9. I'm fighting the urge to make you the happiest woman on Earth tonight. 10. Wanna play army? I'll lay down and you can blow the hell outta me. 11. I wish you were a Pony Carousel outside Superdrug, so I could ride you all day long for a quarter. 12. Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a braille name tag. 13. I'd really like to see how you look when I'm naked. 14. Is that a ladder in your stockings or the stairway to heaven? 15. You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away. 16. You must be the limp doctor because I've got a stiffy. 17. I'd walk a million miles for one of your smiles, and even farther for that thing you do with your tongue. 18. If it's true that we are what we eat, then I could be you by morning. 19. You know, if I were you, I'd have sex with me. 20. You. Me. Whipped cream. Handcuffs. Any questions? 21. F@# me if I'm wrong, but is your name Helga Titsbottom? 22. Those clothes would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor. 23. My name is Austin ... remember that, you'll be screaming it later. 24. Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again? 25. Hi, I'm Mr. Right. Someone said you were looking for me. 26. My friend wants to know if YOU think I'M cute." 27. Hi, the voices in my head told me to come over and talk to you. 28. My name isn't Elmo, but you can tickle me anytime you want to. 29. I know milk does a body good, but DAMN, how much have you been drinking? 30. If you were the last woman and I was the last man on earth, I bet we could do it in public. 31. Wanna come over for some pizza and sex? No? Why, don't you like pizza? 32. Baby, I'm an American Express lover...you shouldn't go home without me. 33. Do you sleep on your stomach? no..........? Can I??? 34. Do you wash your pants in Windex because I can see myself in them. 35. I lost my puppy, can you help me find him? I think he went into this cheap motel room.

-- Anonymous, May 09, 2002

Well, if Min uses any of that lot, he's fu..ed. Oh yea, forgot, that's the whole point.

-- Anonymous, May 09, 2002

I quite like no. 24 as it happens :-) Not too offensive and might raise a smile if properly delivered. Or am I deluding myself, ladies? ;-)

-- Anonymous, May 09, 2002

I actually quite like a few of them ! none of them would work though

-- Anonymous, May 09, 2002

Sorry Mysterious, I hope you manage some sleep tonight.

I really feel it is up to the individual to actually announce it. Maybe the parents have not been told or summat, I am sure the bbs will be the third to know.

-- Anonymous, May 09, 2002

just been reminded that its deffo not me

-- Anonymous, May 09, 2002

Who told you that Syme, the other half of your split personality?

-- Anonymous, May 10, 2002

C'mon sort this thing out now.

-- Anonymous, May 10, 2002

Who's impersonating me?! And telling lies as well eh?!

Get yer filthy mits off my name! I bet it was mackem Raphael

the real min

-- Anonymous, May 10, 2002

Still 67 though. So you've had a shag this year then, have you Min? Care to elaborate?

-- Anonymous, May 10, 2002

...or should that not be m*******ate?

;-)

-- Anonymous, May 10, 2002

Am I missing something or did the person to be congratulated wish to remain anonymous?

-- Anonymous, May 14, 2002

Appears that way.

-- Anonymous, May 14, 2002

Choshi calling, it`s not me either. My students keep asking me if I`m going to find a Japanese girlfriend out here - on reflection that seems improbable in Choshi:

According to City Hall there are approximately 40,000 women in Choshi. Around 75% are either too old or too young for me (please keep your smutty remarks about Japanese school girls to yourself at this point) leaving 10,000. Of those around 60% are married, leaving 4,000. About half of the remainder have boyfriends leaving 2,000. Typically I reckon I find about 1 in 4 to be worth a second look, leaving 500. Assuming (very optimistically) that the same applies for women thinking the same about me, I`m down to 125. I speak hardly any Japanese so in order for any of the above chat-up lines to work I need to find a woman who speaks sufficient English. This narrows it down to only about 5% of the population, leaving me with 6 people. Any suggestions?

-- Anonymous, May 14, 2002

Buy a bigger futon!

;7)

-- Anonymous, May 15, 2002

Two pieces of liver in a jar are meant to be "just like the real thing"...

-- Anonymous, May 15, 2002

Wait till I'm over there. They'll be shagging you just so you introduce them to me.

-- Anonymous, May 15, 2002

6 lasses should be enough, you greedy get Andy !!

-- Anonymous, May 15, 2002

You don't need to speak any Japanese and they don't need to speak any English, so you should be alright.

You could always practise your Japanese skills using body parts -

Andy: kore wa nan desu kaJapanese girl: yubi desu
Andy: ah so

See it's easy

-- Anonymous, May 15, 2002

Sorry, I was being a bit too bold

-- Anonymous, May 15, 2002

I'm going to rely on the old 'sucky sucky' line. Can't fail, can it?

-- Anonymous, May 15, 2002