Got to feel sorry for them. Check out this link from RTG ((ironic title, they've almost gone). Made me laugh, a bit. Somebody needs to hide the sharp knives. Sorry, not a techy, can't do the link thingy, and too lazy (thick) to learn, so cut and paste it is. http://www.readytogo.net/news/1074.html

-- Anonymous, April 25, 2002

Answers

APoplectic

-- Anonymous, April 25, 2002

Don't bother going on...it just winds them up and they come on here making up all sorts of accusations....

-- Anonymous, April 25, 2002

Well it was your daft lot that said "RTG, what's that? sounds painful", "I never go on there" etc etc when we already know a couple of you post there regularly.

That article was penned by my comrade "superkev™" and I couldn't have put it better my self.

ML³

-- Anonymous, April 25, 2002

Gav, you only need look. Don't bother to post.

-- Anonymous, April 25, 2002

ML3, agree, very funny, hence my suggestion that our lot take a look. If the situation was reversed, which it was a couple of years back, we would have penned a similar article, and thought it equally funny. In no way is this the start of yet another boring 'tit for tat' thread

-- Anonymous, April 25, 2002

LoL. I take it aal back - there is human life on Whereside. Nice that you can laugh at yourselves.

2-1, anyone?

-- Anonymous, April 25, 2002

Are we talking about the A-Z thing? I couldn't be arsed to read it - very boring and if indeed it's author was SK and he wants to accuse me of writing cures for insomnia then I'm prepared to take him on in any objective challenge of writing talent he cares to nominate.

Well it was your daft lot that said "RTG, what's that? sounds painful", "I never go on there" etc etc when we already know a couple of you post there regularly.

Can you not see the illogicality in what you say there ML3? Maybe ONE or TWO of our "daft lot" (several of whom have Oxford and Cambridge degrees to my certain knowledge) made that comment. They would almost certainly NOT be the ones who allegedly do post there regularly. When you try to generalise about such a large body of people as the Mags then you will just write unsupportable nonsense. You KNOW that there are some brilliant Magpie fans and some complete tossers, in the same way as I know that Mackems contain all sorts as well.

That article was penned by my comrade "superkev™" and I couldn't have put it better my self.

You underestimate yourself considerably ML3. You have far more wit, intelligence and usually good grace than the author of that whinge.

-- Anonymous, April 25, 2002

The most butt-clenchingly embarrassing whinge I read this season was in the fan's panel in the Sunday Sun after the 1-0 at the SOL. The ungracious prat wrote something to the effect that if this was a team challenging for the Premier title then it didn't say much for the standard of the Premiership. It struck me as being slightly self condemnatory to be downgrading the quality of a competition his team were barely good enough to stay in.

-- Anonymous, April 25, 2002

Need a light jonno..........lol. Can someone just not do a cut n' paste job?? I am afraid to go on there in case I get hijacked.

-- Anonymous, April 25, 2002

I don't know if any of you tune into The 3 Legends on the Radiogram at six o'clock sharp. But the number of Newcastle fans ringing up to criticise Cort, and to a lesser extent Robert (!) is unbelievable. And the piece de resistance, "Bobby is tactically naive". Christ on a bike, I'd take all three off your hands for fifty pence and a king benker.

Oxford and Cambridge are for puffs Jonno. (London meself). ;o)

ML³

-- Anonymous, April 25, 2002

And Jonno, being educated doesn't mean you can't be daft in the affectionate northeastern sense. Don't know about you mate, but a "daft caper" in my house doesn't involve ignorant pickled flower buds of mediterranean origin...;O}

-- Anonymous, April 25, 2002

That might well be so but they're still intelligent puffs ML3. :-) Good to see you with a smile on your face again.

The higher we are and the lower you are, the nearer the wheel is to starting to turn again.

-- Anonymous, April 25, 2002

Syme, Cut & Paste version, as requested. PLEASE, don't anyone moan about me pasting it here. I you don't want to read it, close your eyes now....................The Foulmouthed View of Sunderland's 2001- 2002 Season

22 April, 2002 As the end of this magnificent season draws near is there a better way of remembering it than to have a foulmouthed rant? And by placing it in a tired old A to Z format hopefully the anger, venom and general annoyance can be displayed in all of its glory.

Let's not forget though that this is listed under controversial and that I am writing this after spending 2 days and £140 watching us getting shagged off West Ham United!

So with out any further ado I give you - oh don't read any further if you are of a nervous disposition.

THE FOULMOUTHED REVIEW OF SEASON 2001-02.

A is for Absolute shite. 85% of home games and 90% of away games can be filed in here. You can stick our Swiss fullback in here as well (or up your Haas if you so desire!)

B is for Bastardssssssssssssssssssssssss!!!!!! February the 24th and some big nosed, greasy Greek twat scabs a goal at the ssol. Then takes off his shirt to reveal a reject from Franks Factory Carpets! 'I hate Greek centre-half's me!!'

C is for Comedy. As in comedy fucking defending! See also clowns, crap and catastrophic.

D is for Delightful football. What this has to do with Sunderland is anyone's fucking guess!

E is for Europe. That was supposedly our target. Looks like Benidorm again this year. Instead of Real, Inter and Barca we get sunburn, cheap lager and the shits!

F is for form. The only form shown this season is by the lovely ladies in Idols pre-match. It could be said though that there is a link between the aforementioned lovelies and Sunderland football club. Both heavily reliant on tits.

G is for Gits. Tune into Century FM at 6 o'clock, Monday to Friday and it will all become apparent.

H is for Haircuts. For example- if Kevin Kilbane was a haircut he would be David Hasselhoff's mullet! Or maybe Charlie Dimmocks pubic hair!

I is for Ignorant moronic tosspot. See also Supermac.

J is for Jobs for the boys. Adrian Heath anyone? What other club employs a shortarse twat who’s only responsibility seems to be getting the ball from the opposition dugout and trying to start a rumble with them?

K is for Kingklip. This is a fish, which is native to South African waters, and it is rumoured to have more football ability than over 60% of the players at the Stadium of Fucking light!

L is for Leicester City. A club with wank fans and wank players. And they beat us!!! Cringe!!!

M is for Manchester United. As I write probable ex-champions but still the bench mark that all English football teams should measure themselves against. Supported by the most arrogant, self-centred bunch of titwanks that you will ever meet. Quite good at football though.

N is for Newcastle united. Second only to Manchester United in the fans stakes but nowhere near them when looking at their trophy cabinet. However this will not be apparent to you as one of their fuckwitted fans is bending your ear in the pub. He will have you believe that they have won everything in the game and nearly everything outside the game as well. Crufts, Miss world, Pop Idol and The Generation Game are just a few examples of what they claim to have won. Bizarrely though when questioned about his attendance the fuckwitt will shy away and say that he used to go but blah, blah, blah.

O is for Optimism. On a balmy Glasgow evening last July, up to 5000 of us had a little of it. But, as per-fucking-usual, we managed to find a cloud when a silver lining was on order.

P is for Premier league only fans. 29,000 against West Brom in the FA cup, were you there? Or are you too good for a lowly cup match against lower league opposition?

Q is for Queasy. How 46,000 fans feel at 4-50 pm most Saturdays. Well 46,000 would if approximately 25,000 didn’t fuck off 10 minutes before the end. I mean what’s is the hurry? Surely you can’t all be going for the same bus!

R is for Relegation. Yes our old friend is back. However we, at the time of writing, have not answered the door to him. But is that a foot I can see in the door? Better not be or several members of the Sunderland hierarchy will have their balls cut off and poked up their arses with a red hot poker.

S is for Substitutes. These are the blokes who run up and down the touchline for 40 minutes and go on after the opposition have went 2 goals into the lead. After all of this warm-up they are usually fucked and have no impact on the game. Either that or they are just shite!

T is for Trip. This is the major part of Stan Vargas game. Picture the scene-Ryan Giggs is running towards you at high speed, do you A) Try to force him towards the touchline or b) Trip him up and look like a right twat and then pretend not to understand English?

U is for Underpants. A new pair is required every time any opposition player crosses the halfway line. The sight of our centre-half's playing the offside trap whilst our fullbacks are 20 yards behind then guarantee contractions around the anus at regular intervals.

V is for virtuoso. One blessed with great skill. Maybe one or two at Sunderland but most of the playing talent stink like a tramps knickers on a hot day. Indeed on performances in London this season stink like a tramps knickers after a vindaloo. And 6 pints of Guinness. And a pickled egg.

W is for 'Why the fuck do I bother?' A popular thought amongst the travelling red and whites after yet another humping by a team with crap fans. However these fans should be treat with utmost respect as they get off their arses and go and make some noise all over the country. If I had a hat I would tip it to these lads and lasses.

X is for Xmas. Traditionally the time when our season goes tits up. This season it appears that it came early. Around about August last year! And the present for us was a great big bag full of shit!

Y is for Young talent. Do we have any? Ben Clark is highly thought of in many circles yet we have more chance of seeing Michael Barrymore hosting a game show set in a swimming pool then actually seeing him play for the 1st team.

Z is for Zombie. A person who appears lifeless. Can be seen in the home team dugout at the ssol on match days. Usually dress in an ill- fitting tracksuit and have hair like a CIU committeeman from the early 60's.

So there you have it. A foulmouthed , non-factual review of a season from hell. If you feel you have wasted a few minutes of your life reading this then just think how long you have spent thinking similar thoughts to some of the above. Sunderland football club-Don't you just love 'em.

-- Anonymous, April 25, 2002

Cheers for that, amusing really if you think about it, I am sure it would have been done by a geordie if the roles were reversed. Still just as bobby says "Few things are more important than football"

-- Anonymous, April 25, 2002

Well if nothing else Jonno it shows that I have a sense of humour and that I amnot so far up my own arse that I can see my own tonsils.

You just stick to your pathetic attempts to woo Suzy Brown eh?

-- Anonymous, April 25, 2002

This looks like waking up to reality to me.

The penny's dropped that somebody's season has turned to sh1t and it's time to take the 'there's always next season' attitude.

For what it's worth SK and ML3 (can't be ar5ed to shrink the 3) you're safe, even if you don't take another point.

-- Anonymous, April 25, 2002

Nice to see they dedicate the most words to NUFC.

-- Anonymous, April 25, 2002

Excuse me like Pual but I think that Sunderland get the most words.

-- Anonymous, April 26, 2002

Out of all the topics for each letter, the N is easily the biggest one.

N is for NUFC so out of all the topics, NUFC has had the most time spent on writing it. Just a passing comment :)

-- Anonymous, April 26, 2002

Aye. But I think SK was comparing the NUFC words with the whole. Eee, bliddy hell..............I bet Henry Kissinger had an easier job bring the two sides together.

-- Anonymous, April 27, 2002

yeah - he could fuse them together with napalm

-- Anonymous, April 27, 2002