Heloo people of the catholic forum.

I heard once of a woman I knew who sung I will always love you..by witney houston in a funeral. she did this just before the priest was going to say mass.

I think this is not good because not only can it be distracting for the priest and to the mourners, but most of these love songs these days when they sing about love are actually talkin about sex..am I right.

I know that maybe the mourners would have ALL AGREED to this song being done..therefore they shouldnt worry about being distracted...but my point is, is this unholy...inapropriate...or dissrispectull?

Yours with PEACE AND LOVE

Dom

-- Dominic (domngel@hotmail.com), April 24, 2002

Answers

You are right on target Dom...love is very sinful and should not be tolerated. God forbid anyone should be distracted by love...it would be disgusting. Let the mourners remember their departed without love..it is the Catholic thing to do.

And sex...oy vey...don't mention that word here, people may get bad thoughts. Sex as an expression of love...should never be sung about, talked about or even thought about. If we suppress it enough it will only raise its ugly head in perverts. I bet that woman who sang "I will always love you to her husband" is burning in hell right now.

No love, just peace.

-- Joan Storey (godessss@mindspring.com), April 24, 2002.

Hi Dominic,

Is the song unholy when sung at a funeral? My personal opinion: no.

Is the song inappropriate when sung at a funeral? Well, the lyrics clearly speak of a couple that is breaking up because they aren't "good" together. I don't think it's a very complimentary song to be sung. Here are some of the lyrics:

First verse:

If I should stay.....I would only be in your way. So, I'll go but I know I'll think of you every step of the way.

Second verse:

Bittersweet memories, That is all I'm taking with me. So goodbye, please don't cry. We both know I'm not what you, you need. And I will always love you.

Third verse:

I hope life treats you kind and I hope you have all you dreamed of And I wish to you joy and happiness.

Is the song disrespectful when sung at a funeral? In my opinion, they're only disrespectful to the deceased person.

My $0.02,

Mateo

-- (MattElFeo@netscape.net), April 24, 2002.

You must not have had a relationship in your life Mateo. The song could very well have been 'THEIR SONG"...the words may have less basis in reality ...but it was their song. Bottom line is its none of anyone elses business what and how the grieved wish to do to tribute or morn. That's the problem with fundamentalists they want everyone to follow their way.

-- Joan Storey (godessss@mindspring.com), April 24, 2002.

Yet Ms Storey cannot grasp at what it may do to others who do not know that fact and it could trigger much anger among siblings and others. As usual she cannot use good reasoning.

-- Fred Bishop (fcbishop@globaleyes.net), April 24, 2002.

Sister Bleed Baby Bleed is in favor of trivializing everything.

She trivializes the Catholic faith. She trivializes the fetus about to die by abortion. She trivializes morality, and now she trivializes even good taste in burial services. What can we expect? Her taste is trivial, and those who live in banality and die with banality are ''cool'' to the Sister.

Love itself is trivialized to start with, by her logic. Love in marriage must not be too anxious to bring forth life. Not when death makes love more convenient for the ''health of the mother.'' Pregnancy is just a disease, to Sister Joan. The most trivial of things is a living baby. Why shouldn't she appreciate trivial music at a funeral?

-- eugene c. chavez (chavezec@pacbell.net), April 24, 2002.

Joan, first I put a few questions to you. Are you mental? Have you been diagnosed as having a psychological disorder? Could I refer you to a therapist in your area?

Secondly, please get bent, and kindly sod off. Your open mike night is spent. And don't let the door hit your arse on the way out.

-- Melissa (holy_rhodes@earthlink.net), April 24, 2002.

Completely OFF TOPIC

This song is I thought , original sung by Dolly Parton !! __ Or am I completely wrong , in that case , I'm sorry !!

Greets from a non believer:

-- Laurent LUG. (my__way_@hotmail.com), April 24, 2002.

ALSO completely off topic

Laurent

Yes, Ms Parton originally recorded the song. In fact, she wrote it!

(Still reading the forum, though lying low during the latest unpleasantness)

-- cathy in slovenia (crossways@addall.com), April 25, 2002.

Joan, careful how you phrase things: 'sex is an expression of love...' Better say 'some sex is an expression of love'; otherwise, you would have to include what's happened with this problem of pedophilia as being a form of love. Reductio.

A case in point to make it a little more understandable why some tend to blame the sexual revolution for the current preist scandal.

The sexual revolution, in case you aren't familiar with it, is when Baby Boomers, in a sudden burst of genius insight, were the first in history to unveil the existence of the previously unknown sexual side of the human being. Before then or course, no one knew anything of such matters.

-- Emerald (emerald1@cox.net), April 25, 2002.

Melissa,

Joan, first I put a few questions to you. Are you mental?

I thought this was hilarious. When I was a boy I was taught not to be disrespectful to women, but sometimes *someone* ought to do it!

Frank

-- Someone (ChimingIn@twocents.cam), April 25, 2002.

Thanks, Frank. Happy to give you a giggle. I admit to being a devout, practicing Catholic with a bitch complex. Count on me to call a spade a spade.

-- Melissa (holy_rhodes@earthlink.net), April 25, 2002.

Joan says: That's the problem with fundamentalists they want everyone to follow their way.

Yeah and that's the problem with godde loving-psycho babbling-thinks they're a Catholic but they're not-feminists, too.

-- Jackiea (sorry@dontlikespam.com), April 25, 2002.

Jackiea, I'm pleased. Is it likely that my caustic nature has rubbed off on you? Kudos.

-- Melissa (holy_rhodes@earthlink.net), April 26, 2002.

Oh no, Melissa dear. :) I've always been a snarky girl. Just don't always show it.

PS~I'm a child of the 80's, too. Shhhhhhhhhhhhh.......hehe

-- Jackiea (sorry@dontlikespam.com), April 26, 2002.

I'm well chuffed to see this side of you, Jackiea, you cheeky monkey. Nice to have a kindred spirit! On the eighties, and the snark, as well!

-- Melissa (holy_rhodes@earthlink.net), April 26, 2002.

We have more in common than that, Melissa. :) My grandmother's family is from England on my father's side. My grandmother's family on my mother's side is from France.

Which might explain that odd little English lilt that sometimes creeps in my voice. Hmmmmmmmmm.........

Cheeky little monkey....LOL. You know what still boggles my mind, though? Fag. I just don't get how that one is cigarette. ???

-- Jackiea (sorry@dontlikespam.com), April 26, 2002.

Granted, Jackiea. Fag=cigarette. Better than that, how does the British "fanny" equal the American female genitalia?

Perhaps, with our parallel heritage, we should cross the pond and spend a quid one day? You know, good ole Blighty? Flavorless nosh, brilliant adventures? LOL!

-- Melissa (holy_rhodes@earthlink.net), April 27, 2002.

Etymology time

fag (Brit slang for cigarette) is short for "fag end," which means "the frayed end of a length of cloth or rope" (resembling a cigarette to some, I reckon). Comes from Middle English fagge, meaning broken thread in cloth or something that hangs loose [like a smoking fag?]

fanny (meaning rump or otherwise) takes its meanings from the fact that it is the nickname for the woman's name, Frances.

-- (!@!.!), April 27, 2002.

Jmj

Hi, Dom. You asked, "Is singing 'I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU' in a funeral inappropriate?"

This is an easy one to answer, and we don't even have to look at the lyrics, composer, recording artists, etc..

Between 1985 and 1995, the Vatican issued a document [sorry, don't have a link] that explained a variety of things about music played/sung in Catholic churches -- whether admission could be charged for concerts [no, only voluntary donations], protecting the Blessed Sacrament from desecration, etc., etc..

A major item that was covered was the kinds of music that are permissible and impermissible to play/sing in a Catholic church. The rule goes like this:
(1) Permissible = sacred music and religious music. The first is music written to follow the actual texts of the Mass (Kyrie, Gloria, Responsorial Psalms, etc.). The second is music (especially hymns, chants, and instrumental works) that were directly inspired by sacred things/people (Bible, sacraments, saints).
(2) Impermissible = the rest -- i.e., secular music, including non-religious opera, non-religious classical, popular (top 40), jazz, etc..

I assume that the song you mentioned was a pop hit [I have never heard of it], and the lyrics rendered above seem secular, so the song cannot be sung in a Catholic church.

God bless you.
John

-- (jfgecik@hotmail.com), April 27, 2002.

Thank you (jfgecik@hotmail.com

But i must say that i am disciusted and appauled at Joan Storey (godessss@mindspring.com), answer.

You said: I bet that woman who sang "I will always love you to her husband" is burning in hell right now.

Only God knows who go to hell. you have no right to judge like that.

-- Dominic (domngel@hotmail.com), April 29, 2002.

Dom.
You have quoted Joan's heavy-handed attempt at irony. We cut her a lot of slack, because without these hammy little remarks, she would be without any response at all. Listen to how she sounds:

''You're on target Dom. Love is very sinful and should not be tolerated. God forbid anyone should be distracted by love. It would be disgusting. Let the mourners remember their departed without love. It is the Catholic thing to do.''

Are Catholics turned off by love lyrics? --Is it Catholic ''not'' to love those who are taken from us into God's presence?

Just consider: --Our departed relatives are eulogised in church; with help from the priest, and we offer the Rosary on their behalf, praying in community for the blessed repose of their souls. With floral offerings and condolences for the friends and family of the departed. We may shed tears, and we definitely pray for them, and yes, music can be provided in a solemn manner, while in church. Not POP music, but holy and inspiring music.

If any other kind has a place, it might be at the gravesite; and at home. There can't be anything wrong with it there. But in church; in the holy presence of Our Lord; we preserve some semblence of dignity and solemnity. It's a great occasion, when a soul goes to meet his/her Creator. To bring it down to the level of a ''music video''; an MTV production, or a barn dance, in the confines of God's house--

Yes; sure there are people of no taste or sensitivity. They would like to ignore God altogether; and ''celebrate'' in a pagan manner. However, good Catholics left that behind when they accepted the Holy Gospel. We became children of God, in Holy Baptism. We have faith; not in MTV and the current ''superstars''. In GOD-- and we pray for His mercy and forgiveness; for that good soul we lay to rest in Him.

If that's not love, and if we are ''distracted'' because we leave room for God, and would rather Whitney Huston and Barbra Streisand and ''Cher'' take their act to the lounge bar, the ''happy hour'' where we can drink beer, nosh, and listen to them THERE?

NOT in the House of God-- Who has a divine right to our respect, an attitude of spiritual recollection??? A HEALTHY and WHOLESOME break from the everyday banality of this weird society we're part of?

That's not LOVE? Then what IS? It's unhealthy people with no sense of propriety who love vulgarity. That's ''love'' to people of Joan's disposition. Vulgarity is LOVE.

-- eugene c. chavez (chavezec@pacbell.net), April 29, 2002.

I played 'I will always love you" at my daughter's funeral. The only thing I have to say to you sweetheart is get a life people like you make me sick.

-- penny bell (bellpenny@hotmail.com), March 30, 2004.