Not fucking reading it.

Got to this part of the opening paragraph

...there will be those who rush to praise them too extravagantly for this superficially impressive result.

...and thought 'they can go and fuck themselves on a rusty gatepost, the fuckers.'

They can fuck right off.

-- Anonymous, March 30, 2002

Answers

Anti-Toonalleggedfuckingnewspaper.

-- Anonymous, March 30, 2002

See the Dyer Think Sven Was Impressed? thread.

-- Anonymous, March 30, 2002

Oh let them write what they like....they only show themselves up as total idiots. Anyway, you know the score - the papers talk you up, then take great pleasure in shooting you down. Don`t let the Guardian spoil a wonderful victory for you.(:o)

-- Anonymous, March 30, 2002

Aye, just saw it thanks. Stiil, I needed to start a sweary one alongside. I hate sports writers who's fucking agendas are so transparent.

-- Anonymous, March 30, 2002

Glad to see everyone had the same response as me when I read it this morning. Every match report I have seen except the Guardian's is positive. God - we can only beat who we have to play. If Man U had won 6-2 we would have heard all about their fantastic counter attacking style and ability to win games after going behind.

-- Anonymous, March 30, 2002

I'll just re-re-post this one penned by the same tosser before the season started. I think it should be read as often as possible:

Big spending doesn't always mean wise buys. Watch out for another Newcastle fuel another bout of wishful thinking Newcastle United 1 Lokeren 0 (Newcastle won 5-0 on aggregate)

Michael Walker at St James' Park Monday July 23, 2001 The Guardian

'The notion that those who follow Newcastle United inhabit a parallel universe in which the reality of their club's situation is always confused with a new dawn was strengthened on Saturday night. The simple fact that nearly 30,000 people turned up for a second leg after the first had been won 4-0 in Belgium is in itself perverse evidence of the confusion. Clubs of the stature of Valencia and Juventus have appeared in the InterToto Cup in the past three seasons yet this was a record turnout for the tournament, in what was only was the third round of five.

This again reinforced the idea that Newcastle in 2001, perhaps more than any other club in England, are the sum of their fans' wishful thinking. "An absolutely fabulous crowd," said the manager Bobby Robson. "It's a unique area up here. I adore the crowd. That's what this club is all about."

All well and good. Except that there is not much more.

Take away Alan Shearer, and injury may do so until September, and take away Kieron Dyer, and Leeds United may do so by Christmas, and what is left is a playing staff without the capability to challenge for anything more than mid-table safety. Only the stone-hearted would not feel sympathy for Robson.

Anywhere else this would be the cause of profound agitation. But the hierarchy trampled quickly on reports last week that there had been a form of supporter backlash in the shape of abnormally slow season- ticket sales, and the crowd on Saturday suggested that a disproportionate amount of optimism was derived from the first-leg result. Maybe they are waiting until Manchester United and Liverpool arrive in September before crying "Sack the board".

Or maybe they will be doing so by midweek. On Wednesday night Newcastle play 1860 Munich in the Olympic stadium in the next round. Presumably the Germans will offer more questions than their Belgian counterparts, even if 1860 finished 11th in the Bundesliga, 19 points behind their neighbours Bayern.

Victory over two legs would leave Newcastle in one of the InterToto's three finals, but that cannot be guaranteed after this performance. Sluggish, somewhat understandably, against dismal opponents, a contest that petered in was won courtesy of the £6m Craig Bellamy's first goal in black and white, a close-range finish on the hour.

Still, the majority trooped off happy to have witnessed a win and a clean sheet. For the neutral the concern is that these people will soon have their faith, self-perpetuated by their sheer numbers, exposed as an illusion. This could be a long season at Newcastle. And not just because it started in July.'

-- Anonymous, March 30, 2002

A satisfying read!

-- Anonymous, March 30, 2002

Amusing read, Shagspeare. :-)

-- Anonymous, March 30, 2002