Over a gynecologist's office: "Dr. Jones, at your cervix."

On a plumber's truck: "We repair what your husband fixed."

On the trucks of a local plumbing company in NE Pennsylvania: "Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber."

Pizza shop slogan: "7 days without pizza makes one weak."

Outside a muffler shop: "No appointment necessary. We hear you coming."

In a veterinarian's waiting room: "Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"

Door of a plastic surgeon's office: "We can help you pick your nose!"

On an electrician's truck: "Let us remove your shorts."

In a non-smoking area: "If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action."

On a maternity room door: "Push. Push. Push."

At an optometrist's office: "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."

In the front yard of a funeral home: "Drive carefully. We'll wait."

Outside a travel agency: "Please Go Away"

-- Anonymous, March 26, 2002

Answers

Pardon my naivety Ciara, but are they genuine ? They come across like they might be.

-- Anonymous, March 26, 2002

I've seen a few of them, so it's quite possible they're all real. There's a car repair chain here that used to have a slogan on their radio ads, "We'll brake, shock and exhaust you" :-)

-- Anonymous, March 26, 2002

Excellent Ciara! These could well be genuine - although the cervix one is a joke by Joan Rivers from more than 12 years ago.

-- Anonymous, March 26, 2002

Sign on an office wall.... Will all employee's wanting to attend their grandmothers funeral, Please inform management before 12'O clock on the day of the match.

-- Anonymous, March 26, 2002

I guess that would be by 12o'clock midnight during the World Cup? ;-)

-- Anonymous, March 26, 2002