This is the billing for the one and only MARK LAWRENSON!!!! He has a column in The Mirror and it's headed Mark Lawrenson - Football's No 1 Expert. LOL! No 2 expert I could believe - because he's shite! :-)

So what does Football's no 1 expert have to say in Tuesday's Mirror?

I think Arsenal will beat them (Deportivo) at Highbury because Wenger's side have the bit between their teeth...Deportivo are definitely not that good a side away from home

Well there you have it - straight from the horse's mouth arse.

-- Anonymous, March 12, 2002

Answers

Automated Pillock

-- Anonymous, March 12, 2002

I saw Lawrenson on Tyne Tees news last night but couldn't work out what he was doing (I was on the phone at the time). I don't know how he dare show his face in the NE after his stint at NUFC. Defensive coach - my arse!

-- Anonymous, March 13, 2002

I think he was in the area for some sort of coaching session. I wasn't on the phone, but still didn't get the full gist.

Probably coaching the inmates of Frankland, cos any audience other than captive might have been embarrassing.

-- Anonymous, March 13, 2002

When I saw the thread heading I thought it was referring to Screacher, or Minnesota Fats as I believe he is now hailed. Instead I find out it's some old bloke from the North with dodgy hair, badly fitting clothes, strange views on football (and NUFC in particular) and an odd accent. Then again....................

-- Anonymous, March 13, 2002

I once saw a tanker truck used on an island to clean out their chemical toilets. That had the logo "Number 1 in the Number 2 business". Maybe that's a better title for the Lawrenson column.

-- Anonymous, March 13, 2002