Cast your minds back to last week. Toon Down Under were playing in the seasons opener against last seasons champs. Despite going in at half time 3-0 down, we stormed back in the second half to win 4-3. Well, we just played the second game of the season. And here is the match report...

Summer in Sydney is akin in many ways to a winter down Kingston Park. Fortunately for us, temperature is not one of these similarities. However, rain had affected the pitch via a leak in the all-weather pitch. Hence there was a rug place on the gym floor to soak up the water. On arriving at the stadium/community centre we were greeted by hundreds of women (I counted at least 6). Hoping word of our heroic exploits of last week had reached female ears, it soon became clear that they were here to watch the team that played before us. Still, never mind. We had our own fanbase of Lady Tynedale, Father Tynedale, Brother Tynedale (aka Aders), ADK'sX and Claire. Our enemy this week was 'Daves Hedgehogs'. A motley crew of pirates, vagabonds and tax professionals. Our line-up was ADK (captain), Nick, Tynedale (gk), Muzza and Sting. The game itself was a tightly contested affair largely lacking in individual flair. The breakthrough came after a flowing move on the counter attack. Nick took the ball to the edge of their area and passed to Muzza on the right. Muzza shot and the ball struck something or other (maybe the goalie) and bobbled over the line. This is largely unfamiliar territory, we were leading 1-0. Half time saw the usual round of finger pointing and accusation. Out for the second half determined to 'keep it tight', 'close them down' and other generic calls to arms. Our opponents had to take some risks. Using their keeper outfield a bit more to overpower the geordie midfield. And on one of these Pav like dribbles up field disaster struck. Disaster for them - the fools. One of our boys tackled the keeper. Sting calmly side-stepped and struck the ball cleanly into the back of the empty net from near the halfway line. Hells teeth, we're 2-0 up. Guarding ourselves for a comeback of such magnitude that it hadn't been seen since we did one last week, we knuckled down to see the 3 points go the way of justice. Was a clean sheet a possibility? Well, no. Their best player managed to get a half yard on Muzza. Hell of a finish though. Shaken but not about to bottle it, we focussed on the task. 5 minutes left. The enemy, sensing a comeback, were advancing up field leaving space at the back. The ball was played deftly by someone and Nick ran on. With only the keeper to beat, he is foiled by good goal keeping. I say good goal keeping but the goal is only marginally wider than a human male. Some good possession and shame faced time wasting meant we made it to full time at 2-1. So we win again. Can anything stop us? Well, yes - there's always better teams, excess rain and syphilis. So off to the pub to celebrate. We are top of the league, say we are top of the league.

-- Anonymous, February 20, 2002

Answers

TIWYDU

-- Anonymous, February 20, 2002

Nice match report Nick. You managed to keep yourself out of it with great humility I felt

;O))

But haway man - it's a bit unfair telling the world about me syphilis problem still keeping me out the team don't you think ...

-- Anonymous, February 21, 2002

I suppose the rest of the team call you Jigsaw?

"Nick took the ball to the edge of their area and passed to Muzza"

"and Nick ran on. With only the keeper to beat, he is foiled"

or is it "Choker"?

-- Anonymous, February 21, 2002

In Nick's defence, he's right that the goal is only marginally bigger than the average sized man. Mind you, know as I come to think of it, they did have their skinniest player in goal........ Choker!!

-- Anonymous, February 23, 2002

don't bother this week - we were Cr*p! Beaten 4-3 ....too much of everything last night...and not even hair of the dog after the match, bloody terrible, we'll have to bring some new blood in!

-- Anonymous, February 25, 2002