Humor for Carl,Mailman : LUSENET : Current News - Homefront Preparations : One Thread

Subject: Pinnochio

One night, Pinnochio's girlfriend says to him, "This stinks. Every time we make love I get splinters."

So Pinnochio goes to Gepetto to ask his advice. Gepetto says, "Sandpaper, my boy, that's all you need."

A few days later Gepetto runs into Pinnochio and says, "So how are you doing with the girls now?"

Pinnochio says, "Who needs girls?"

-- Anonymous, January 28, 2002


Carl and Barefoot, I want a FULL report, what grade sandpaper works best for you?? LOL

-- Anonymous, January 29, 2002


I don't need a visual for this one. OUCH!

-- Anonymous, January 29, 2002

i dated a sandi for a short while...

-- Anonymous, January 29, 2002

Having sex on the beach can be a similar sensation, especialy if you forget the blanket....

-- Anonymous, January 29, 2002

I think that doggie style would be better at keeping the sand off.

It's more obvious from a distance as to what you are doing, though.

-- Anonymous, January 29, 2002

Hair Spray

A little boy and his grandfather are raking leaves in the yard. The little boy sees an earthworm trying to get back into its hole. He says, "Grandpa, I bet I can put that worm back in that hole." The grandfather replies, "I'll bet you five dollars you can't. It's too wiggly and limp to put back in that little hole." The little boy runs into the house and comes back out with a can of hair spray. He sprays the worm until it is straight and stiff as a board. Then he stuffs the worm back into the hole. The grandfather hands the little boy five dollars, grabs the hair spray and runs into the house. Thirty minutes later, the grandfather comes back out and hands the little boy another five dollars. The little boy says, "Grandpa, you already gave me five dollars." The grandfather replies, "I know. That's from your grandma." >

-- Anonymous, January 29, 2002

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