>>MEN'S NAMES >>Aaron - ugly but hung like a horse, prone to belly button fluff. >>Adam - cute, funny, chicks dig him, well hung but very caring. >>Adrian - usually short and very horny, watches cartoons. >>Alan - shy but sensitive, gets screwed over by women. >> >>Alex - cute and short but a liar and a cheat. >>Amir - dirty, smelly, pecker is minuscule. >> >>Andrew - gay and has a small pecker. >>Antonio - has a great body and beautiful skin, and chicken brain. >>Anthony - great guy and kind to all girls, smells of wee. >>Arnold - loser. >>Arthur - hung like a slave and celibate. >>Barry - lights fires, pinches girls bottoms and is well hung. >>Ben - funny and can be real difficult to beat at games. >>Bob - quiet and unpopular, eats with his hands. >>Brad - thinks everyone likes him...but they don't. >>Brandon - good looking but uses girls. >>Brendan - quiet and sweet, gets beaten up all the time. >> >>Brett - world wide slut and really insensitive, women love him. >>Brian - mean and only thinks of himself, no he's not the Messiah he's >>just >> >>a >>very naughty boy. >>Bryan - sexy, but stupid - can't spell. >>Bronsen - annoying and never grows up - has a stupid name. >>Bruce - stinks bad and thinks everyone else's name is also Bruce. Bryce >>- >>fun to be with and will make you laugh, you'll kill him within a week. >>Calvin - immature in a naive way, drives a Gemini. >>Cameron - Australian. >>Carl - thinks he's funny...he's not, falls asleep during sex. >> >>Carson - fun to be around and really sensitive. >>Chad - cute, sensitive and very studly - only found in American movies, >>no >>real person has that name. >> >>Charles - can't trust him, eyes too close together. >>Chris - can't pull, will pay for women, but has a huge pecker and can >>use >>it >>too. >>Christian - very sexy and seductive. >>Clark - hilarious and always in trouble, problem with 'jailbait'. >>Cliff - very sweet and adores girls, but very superficial. >>Cole - nice, funny, and fun to be around. >> >>Colin - lies to women and blows up public buildings. >>Cory - funny but ugly, ends up running fashion magazines. >>Craig - tries to fit in - he never does. >>Damon - total loser in a sweaty sort of way. >>Dan - quiet but funny, but becomes easily addicted to narcotics. >> >>Dane - weird but can hold together a conversation with a mermaid. >>Daniel - enjoys root vegetables in every orifice. >>Darren - charming , but sleeps with men. >>Daryl - smells bad, has no real mates >>David - hotty and works out a lot, loves girls named Florence. >>Dave - extremely sexy, always funny, intelligent, stylish, trendsetter >>i.e. >>a wanker. >> >>Dean - full of himself and thinks with his dick. >>Dennis - either very nice to girls or a faggot. >>Derek - has a great sense of humour, and blow-up doll collection. >>Dominic - hilarious and will do anything to please. >>Don - dickhead. >>Doug - has a greasy face, drinking problem and farts. >> >>Drew - bad-arse loser who never shuts up. >>Duncan - hopeless ski bum, brains shot away long ago. >>Dylan - horny. bastard, who can't sing. >>Dwayne - cool guy to be around if you can handle his name. >>Eddie - wants too many chicks he'll never get cos he's an arsehole. >>Elliott - full of himself. >>Eric - shy. >> >>Evan - a little slow but sweet, sexy, and model mental patient. >>Frank - "different" - missing DNA - favours girls named Lucy. >>Fraser - sucks pigs dicks & swallows the lot. >>Gareth - sweet but dresses too good to be straight. >>Gary - drug addict but willing to share. >>Gavin - likes bondage, S&M with other men. >>Geoff - prefers golf to sex and war to peace. >> >>George - barman who drinks more than he serves. >>Glen - the sweetest guy - really down to earth. >>Greame - very hard to understand, likes group sex. >>Graham - will screw anything. >>Grant - HORNY! but so sweet and you can talk to him about anything. >>Greg - really sweet and feels sorry for himself. >> >>Harry - covers his back. >>Harvey - cute, but addicted to sex and/or drugs. >>Hathem - smooth, but very manipulative, not to be trusted around young >>girls. >>Haydn - tries hard. >>Howard - likes small-breasted women and pornography. >>Ian - really popular but knows all the girls want him...yeh right!!! >>Ivor - militant psychopath with homosexual tendencies. >> >>Jake - shy and sweet but a slut when drunk. >>Jamie - scum of the earth. >>James - built like a horse. >>Jay - very sweet when you get to know him well. >>Jeff - really ugly. >> >>Jerome - gay, but very unhappy. >>Jeremy - loud and thinks that he's all that he says he is. >>Jesse - unpopular and needs to move on. >>Jack - stupid but hot, always alright. >>Jim - sweet, has fantasies of love and affection. >>Joe - built like a bear, sexy but tends to lose his head. >>Joel - arse. >>John - has no friends or life - tends to kill small animals. >>Jolyon - absolute raving homosexual. >> >>Jonathon - think he's good - he's shit. >>Jordan - sexy but weird in bed. >>Jose - hot boy with a love of hermaphrodites. >>Josh - full of himself, fun. >> >>Junior - hotty and totally good at football. >>Justin - aggravating but lovable, insecure but successful. >>Kain - the sexiest guy alive but very stuck up. >>Kevin - always attracts really fit girlfriends also has a large penis, >>really nice to women. >>Keith - good person to talk to when you have a problem - his is worse. >>Kenneth - very, very...anything you want him to be. >>Kurt - can kick anyone's arse. >>Kyle - hornball who eats too many cornchips. >>Larry - cute but wannabe player with big arse. >> >>Laurey - short and funny looking. >>Lee - girl dressed up as a boy, total arse bandit. >>Lewis - lonely, sad git, bit of a tosser. >> >>Lyndon - can always be found in bed or in the pub. >>Liam - loud mouthed arsehole. >>Lorenzo - fine and dresses in stolen gold. >>Lucas - fat loser that dates other men. >>Luke - seems to be sweet. >>Malcolm - tall man who tends to lose his trousers. >>Mark - wished girls liked him for who he is not his great looks, mouthy >>bastard though. >>Matt - the fat boy of the class, likes sweets and is full of shit. >>Michael - very good looking but he'll do anything for a girl. >>Mick - always drunk, tendency for drug abuse. >> >>Mohammed - small penis >>Nathan - stupid as hell, and tends to make others feel dumb. >> >>Nick - nice - can't get past the missionary position though. >>Neil - sweet and will do anything in this world for you, great in bed. >>Oliver - likes men but is in denial. >>Oscar - loser. >>Owen - cute gay guy who is immature, and sings Welsh songs. >>Patrick - drunk, drunk, drunk. >>Paul - cool, calm and handsome, a quality only found in gays. >>Peter - cutie but very shy, makes women feel like virgins. >>Phillip - stupid idiot who wishes he were cool. >>Rhys - great lover but had his mind stolen by aliens a long, long time >>ago. >>Richard - can't see his feet as balls are too big >> >>Ricky - ugly shithead who everybody hates. >> >>Rikki - see above. >>Rob - constantly watches porn. >>Roy - total loser and computer genius. >>Rupert - arrogant twat who is crap in bed but thinks he is a stud. >>Russell - likes to play in the leaves which makes him an arsehole. >>Ryan - short but sexy body and even sexier mind. >>Sam - wannabe sex machine. >>Scott - has serious disabilities. >>Sean - has small testicles and no friends. >>Seth - so sweet to other people but is a traitor. >>Shane - thinks everybody wants to shag him - he's a virgin. >>Shannon - the most determined and persevering sweetie in the world. >>Shaun - bit of a hard bastard, thinks women love him. >> >> >>Simon - likes a night out with the lads and curries. Talks bollocks. >>Spencer - loves it right up there, normally with a toilet roll and a >>hamster >>Steve - popular and funny when looked at side-on. >>Stuart - droll guy with great arse and suicidal tendencies but great in >>bed. >>Tim - hot but a bit strange, can never tell where he is. >>Toby - best blow ever. >>Tom - cool but can be arrogant. >>Tony - hot, sweet, and totally fun to be around. >>Travis - fat and horny with the best XXX collection to be found. >>Trevor - sweet and funny but sometimes untrustworthy. >>Troy - cute and popular. >>Taylor - gay. >> >> >>Warren - cool, homosexual guy. >>Wesley - great guy and easy to tolerate. >>Will - wishes he were popular. >>Zach - sweet and polite and adorable. >>Zahid - devious and sly. Not to be trusted. >>WOMEN'S NAMES >>Ada - blue haired, smells of wee. >>Aileen - laughs like a demented dog. likes tic tacs >>Alison - bra and pants are the same garment, looks better with the light >> >>off. >>Amanda - I.Q. tends to be smaller than bra size. Probably a good shag >>though. >> >>Amy - Devious, Likes being on top, never stays the night - Not to be >> >>trusted. >>Andrea - Small breasts, drinks pints. >>Angela - Vain, Hair style more important than oxygen. Usually found >>hanging >>around toilets. >>Annabelle - Doesn't wear knickers. >>Annette - She's BIG. >>Anne - Looks like a horse, can't drive. >>Barbara - Shags like a rabbit, not fussy about appearance. >>Belinda - Pleasing on the eye, usually has a couple of good points. >>Beryl - Repressed alcoholic. >>Beverley - Trapped in an eighties timewarp. >> >>Bianca - Ginger. >>Bridgette - Eats pizzas all day, smokes cigars. >> >>Britney - Falsely improved, no use to society. >>Camilla - replaces the word 'yes' with 'ya'. >>Carina - Looks like the back of a bus, doesn't swallow. >>Caroline - Lard arse, shaves her ears. >>Catherine - Attracted to the older man, needs ironing. >>Claire - Usually neurotic, gives good head, can have lesbian tendencies. >> >>Celine - Emits hideous noises, waste of DNA. >>Charlotte - Enjoys tea and cake, farts the national anthem. >>Cheryl - Can fit hand in mouth, eats glass. >>Christine - Likes men in uniform, never warm. >> >>Daisy - Virgin. >>Danni - Should make nice threesome with sibling. >>Davina - drug induced mental damage, should shave her neck. >> >>Dawn - Gets up early, smells of chips. >>Deborah - Bites the pillow, uses both hands. >>DeeDee - cannot understand why no-one else masturbates in Ikea. >>Denise - Sits on cats eyes, wears too much make up. >>Diane - Enjoys company of animals. Deep as a puddle. Adds nothing to >>society. >>Donna - 70's throw back, likes cabbage. >>Doris - Purple haired, stinks of wee. >>Elaine - Rides side saddle, drinks meths. >>Elizabeth - Born to perform, hates chickens. >> >>Ellie - Far too attractive for the swear words that come out of her >>mouth. >>Emily - Wears odd socks, can have lesbian tendencies. >>Emma - Gullible and easily swayed by a good looker! >> >>Estelle - Likes wombles, eats grass. >>Esther - Plump with sagging breasts, normally heavily tattooed. >>Faith - Legs meet at knees, can't shag standing up. >>Faye - Wears wellies, can't swim. >>Felicity - She'll stab you with her nipples, plays darts. >>Fiona - Female mud wrestler, gives head. >>Gail - Farts a lot, drinks Guinness. >>Gayleen - Big tall woman who talks shite all day. >>Gaynor - Lesbian. >> >>Geraldine - Too posh for her own good, likes flying. >>Gillian - Dyes her hair green, likes clubbing. >>Gina - Eternal mother, eats nappies. >>Glenda - Eats children, hates smoking. >>Georgina - Wants to be a man. >> >>Gwyneth - Blubs a lot, wees in the bath. >>Hannah - Needs to be naked at all times, eats kebabs. >>Heather - Shags like a freight train, a screamer. >>Helen - Hangs around with the wrong crowd, Kinky in bed, loves porn. >>Heidi - The hills are alive with the sound of music, likes gherkins. >>Hilary - Frigid. >>Holly - Prickly to the touch, seasonal shagmeister. >>Imogen - Drinks tequila from the bottle, wets the bed. >> >>Ingrid - Right wing Nazi tendencies, never smiles. >>Jackie - Heroin addict, sold her child. >>Janet - Massive over bite, no neck. >>Jane - Babe, I'd drink her bath water. >>Jasmin - Smells of sewers, eats the heads off rats. >>Jemma - Does anal, wears too much eye make-up. >> >>Jennifer - Huge breasts, should shave her legs more often. >>Jessica - Virgin, always will be. >>Joanne - Moans in her sleep, cant cook, moans when she wakes up! >>Judith - Big eyes, big tits >>Judy - Huge tits, married to an arse. >>Julia - Innocent face, don't trust her, she'll steal your wallet in five >> >> >>minutes >>Justine- Massive tits, likes hanging around men's toilets. >>Julie - Jabba the Hutt's sister, constantly pregnant. >>Karen - Huge tits, shags like a rabbit. >>Kate - see Catherine. >>Kelly - smells of cheese, slobbers when kissing. >>Kimberley - wants to be a bloke, drinks like a bloke, farts like a >> >>bloke, >>wears a wig. >>Kirsty - Eats live moles, can't dance. >>Kylie - Can't sing but who cares. >>Lana - Hated by her parents, accidental pregnancy. >>Lara - Action packed, never seen naked. >> >>Laura - Likes Max power magazine, can't drive. >>Lauren - Pert breasts, seldom ventures out at night. >>Leah - Likes outdoor sex, wees standing up. >>Lena - Eats food then throws up, rapidly shrinking. >>Leslie - Likes bondage, hates men. >>Linda - Teenage bride, can swallow oranges whole. >>Lindsey - Likes doggy style, doesn't do housework. >>Lisa - Will take all your money and run, gets turned on by porn. >> >>Liz - Long legged and brainey. >>Lorraine - Constantly whinges, will strip for a packet of jellybabies >>Louise/a - Likes to get around, saggy tits. >>Lucy - Strange dancer, wants to marry her dad. >>Madeline - Drives like a bloke, likes tractors. >> >>Maggie - Trainspotter, likes plaid. >>Margaret - Lovely mother, very generous. >>Maria - Bangs like a barn door. >>Marie - Life sapping dominatrix. Likes men to do DIY. >>Marina - No get up and go, rusty underwear. >>Marolyn - Eats like a horse, out stays her welcome. >>Martina - Ugly lesbian. >>Martine - Can't act, can't sing, nice tits. >>Matilda - Likes dancing, mainly the waltz. >> >>Meg - Cheesy smell, should be spelt with an S. >>Melanie - Can hold 2 bar vacuum orally indefinitely. >>Melissa - Eats dogs, been in prison 6 times for burglary. >>Meryl - Dances like an ape, doesn't realise. >> >>Michaela - Likes animals, should make a video with them. >>Michelle - Wears white stilettos, dances round her handbag. >>Marsha - Big butt, small brain. >>Monica - Doesn't swallow, should have. >>Naomi - Wannabe diva, more of a diver. >>Nancy - White hair, remembers tanners. >>Natalie - Eats with her mouth open, farts the Nokia phone tune. >>Natasha - Had seven kids before age 17, needs ironing. >>Nell - Hasn't realised WWII has ended, lives in Kent. >>Nicola - Slapper, alcoholic in denial. >> >>Nina - Stuffs her bra with tissues, been single for years. >>Olga - You can park a bike in her arse crack, excessive facial hair. >>Olivia - Neutron bomb. >> >>Pamela - Gives amazing head, made of plastic. >>Pat - Butt ugly lesbian. >>Paula - Transvestite merchant banker from Basildon. >>Penelope - Pitstop queen, likes men to be stiff. >>Phillippa - Forest forager, likes wild boar. >>Priscilla - likes painting with oils, Duckhams mainly. >>Rachel - Amazing gravity defying breasts, can grip a tenner in her >>arsecheeks. >>Rebecca - Hairy armpits, orgasms without contact. >>Rose - Can be prickly, good head giver. >>Rula - She measures up well. >> >>Sadie - Stand up if you're slim, please stand up. >>Sally - Drives a Mustang, fights in pubs. >> >>Samantha - Loves her brother, has 4 deformed children. >>Sandra - Shags donkeys for fun, bow legged. >>Sarah - Likes pressed flowers and body piercing. >>Selina - Doesn't wear pants, heavy laundry bills. >>Sharon - Shags like a locomotive, yo-yo knickers. >>Shirley - Can swallow a Curly Whirly whole, likes bananas. >>Sian - Does mean sheep impression, hates mint sauce. >>Simone - Used to be a shotputter from Cardiff. >>Sonya - Dirty lady of the night. Often referred to as a "carrier" >>Sophie - Brothel madam, wears a wrinkly corset. >>Stacey - Likes cut off jeans and arseless Speedo's. >>Steffi - Closet lesbian, maintains heterosexual relationship for effect. >> >> >> >>Stephanie - Eats Muppets, wears Brogues. >>Sue/Susanne - should shave more often, wears Denim aftershave. >>Tanya - Hot minx, too short. >>Tara - Upper class slapper, needs extra chemicals. >>Tina - Face like a smacked arse, should eat less. >>Tori - Lives in a hedge, can't water ski. >>Tracy - Easily swayed by alcohol. Mostly seen without underwear. Loves >>kittens. >>Tracey - Lesbian. >>Ursula - Likes puppies, in curry. >>Vicky- Likes Yoga. And Women. >>Wendy - Possibly a man. >>Zoe - Talentless rock chick. Prepared to use sex as a weapon. >>

-- Anonymous, January 17, 2002

Answers

Sorry about the format!

-- Anonymous, January 17, 2002

pretty close that mind, of course its all bollox though. I am sure screacher will be happy with his.

-- Anonymous, January 17, 2002

Not sure about the last bit of mine like :)

-- Anonymous, January 17, 2002

One of my ex's is named Sean. Half of that descrip is accurate. ;-)

-- Anonymous, January 17, 2002

Does anyone know any karen's? No offense to the young ladies in attendance.

-- Anonymous, January 17, 2002

.... does he have any mates, ciara? ;o{]

-- Anonymous, January 17, 2002

Not impressed, hic :-(

Where are these from?

Oh and I quite like Del boy's ;7)

-- Anonymous, January 17, 2002

I'll say no more, Clarky. ;-)

-- Anonymous, January 17, 2002

I used to go out with a karen , she was vey petit no breasts at all. Nice all the same. My wife is rachel very true - bar the gravity bit :- )

-- Anonymous, January 17, 2002

And to think I used to fancy the pants off Gwyneth Paltrow

:((

-- Anonymous, January 17, 2002

Nowt wrong with the missionary position.

-- Anonymous, January 17, 2002

i didn't find elena in there

-- Anonymous, January 18, 2002

So you can swallow whole oranges can you Dougs ;)) Of course it's a load of bollox...I'm not keen on bondage at all ;)))

-- Anonymous, January 18, 2002

Line up those virgins!..;-)

-- Anonymous, January 18, 2002

Get in the queue Mr. Miller!

-- Anonymous, January 18, 2002

My wife will refute both points on my behalf, she said so before. There's a Karen sits just outside my door and I can vouch for the tit's (looking only). Wouldn't mind investigating the second part.

-- Anonymous, January 18, 2002

Gav, what, you mean most people can't swallow oranges whole? That'll account for the funny look I got at lunchtime yesterday...

-- Anonymous, January 18, 2002

Poor Rik ;-)Mind, dunno why I feel sorry for him - I´m just off to kill mesel

-- Anonymous, January 18, 2002

I can think of worse things to smell like than wee (c:

-- Anonymous, January 19, 2002