Greetings one and all from my Fatherland. I'm over here on a family trip and have managed to extricate myself from my myriad aunties, uncles and cousins to find an internet cafe. Not sure which is sadder, that I'm nearly 30 and am on holiday with my mam and dad, or that I'm on holiday and can't last for a couple of weeks without my dose of Toon gossip.....

Thought I'd let you all know that I visited a temple yesterday and made an offering of a bowl of fruit which apparently entitled me to make a wish. I thought about world peace, but decided that I'd probably need a bigger bowl of fruit so settled for a toon win on Saturday (don't worry, I checked, you're allowed to tell people what you wished for). If it comes off I'm thinking about becoming a Bhuddist full time.

Also found an interesting little ritual involving setting light to a coconut and smashing it on a big stone. Seems that for every nut you smash you get to curse someone. After a very happy half an hour I was dragged off kicking and screaming, covered with coconut fragments shouting "one more, just one more, I haven't cracked one for Trelford Mills yet!!!". Mark Lawrenson, Alex Ferguson, TSM, Andreas Anderson, Lee Bower and my old Physics teacher weren't so lucky and can expect divine retribution to be heaped upon them any day now.

Anyway, it seems by the miracle of technology there's a good chance I might actually get to see the game as they're showing 1 live and 1 on tape delay here on Saturday. Otherwise I'm scuppered as the internet cafe shuts round about half time........

-- Anonymous, January 10, 2002

Answers

A (tropical) Paradise

-- Anonymous, January 10, 2002

Does it work with any type of nut? Actually, the thought of crushed nuts makes me feel uneasy...

Some friends of ours went to Sri Lanka last year (they won a C4 Cricket holiday for the final test match - we won, btw). They said it was fabulous, although plenty of poverty and that there is quite a hefty security presence. When it calms down again I'd like to go

-- Anonymous, January 10, 2002

Nice one, a bit jealous but that'll evaporate by the time 3pm Saturday arrives.

-- Anonymous, January 10, 2002

Al, hi mate, whereabouts are you in Sri Lanka, I worked there for about 9 months in 2000/2001?

If you're in Colombo (I'd be surprised if you're holidaying there?) the best place to watch the football (unless Manure are playing!) is in the London Town Pub at the Hilton - also good there (the Blue Elephant) for the ladies!

As you're on your hols., my guess is you're somewhere on the west coast, south of Colombo?

Enjoy it mate and, do yourself a favour, stay off the arrack! :-(

-- Anonymous, January 10, 2002

Wonderful place Al

Spent some time constructing the Victoria Dam up near Kandy... had the Kandy Dancers too.

Hikadua and Tricomalee were favourite haunts

Arrack and Coke brings back the memories

Have a good time

-- Anonymous, January 10, 2002

' had the kandy dancers too' ... how many of them was there bob you saucy get :-)

-- Anonymous, January 10, 2002

Have you been out on the ace yet? Do they play good darts? Have you unleashed any arrows? What about the ELS? Or is it muntersville? CAn't imagine there is much chrome in the Lanka. Wurd.

-- Anonymous, January 10, 2002

Yeah bob, I spent last (end of 2000) New Year's Eve in Hikkadua, a rave of the place.

Arrack & Coke? Well, maybe two or three, not a couple of bottles of the stuff that me and my driver once downed :-(

-- Anonymous, January 10, 2002

I heard you were on yer hols mate. When you back in Sydney town ? I hear beers with the lads calling

-- Anonymous, January 11, 2002

I'm in Kandy at the moment - not really a holiday (he says, typing a quick message before heading off to lounge by the pool) more of a family visit so location is largely determined by where the rellies are. We've spent some time in Colombo & Nuwara Eliya and will be going to Kattharagama & Dambulla before heading back to Colombo.

Security presence is relatively light at the moment, the current ceasefire is being observed whilst everyone waits to see if the new government lives up to it's promises. Last time I was here (10 years ago) we were stopped at roadblocks maybe a dozen times, this time we've only been stopped once.

As far as coming here on holiday goes, I wouldn't be put off by security side of things - so long as you stay South (and they won't let you go North anyway) it's fine. Hit Kandy & the beaches and you'll have a great time.

LT, back in Sydney a week on Monday (21st I think), looking forward to catching up.

-- Anonymous, January 13, 2002