I know someone is going to say, "well they get paid enough" but this is still nice:

HOSPITALISED CHILDREN DELIGHTED TO SEE UNITED PLAYERS The Newcastle United first team squad put their preparations for their top of the table clash at Leeds United on Saturday on hold yesterday afternoon when, as part of their commitment to the Fleming Children's Trust, the Charity of which the Club are Patrons, they visited the three main Newcastle based hospitals to bring Christmas cheer to a large number of North East children.

Newcastle players visit children's wards as part of their commitment to the Fleming Children's Trust, a charity of which the Club is patrons. The Fleming Children's Trust is dedicated to providing care and support for children in hospital as well as after care support too in the General, RVI and Freeman Hospitals in Newcastle. The Trust also cares for the families of the children who stay with them in hospital. The Patronage by Newcastle United is particularly appropriate and fitting given the home of the Magpies is in the regional centre of the North East of England and The Fleming Children's Trust is the regional centre for specialist care for sick children. Thirty players were involved, split into three groups of 10 each, and they dutifully made their way, courtesy of three mini buses (two of which were donated to the Club last month by Commercial vehicle rental group Northgate plc and one of its subsidiary companies Caledonian Self Drive Limited, and an additional one was provided by Northgate especially for this occasion) to their respective hospitals: the General, Freeman and The Royal Victoria Infirmary. The purpose of the visits, which are an annual pilgrimage for the players, is to brighten up the lives of sick children in the three hospitals, not just by their very presence which always goes down a treat, but by delivering goodie bags of sweets, toys, and Newcastle United merchandise. Four children's wards were visited at both the General and Freeman Hospitals whilst at the RVI, the players managed to make their way around eight wards. United's Welsh International midfielder Gary Speed was one of those at the RVI and he said: "We have all had a marvellous time. All the players really enjoy these visits and to see the joy on the children's faces when we come into the wards is something special. Bringing some cheer into the lives of the sick children, and giving them a nice selection of presents, has been a tremendously rewarding experience for us."

-- Anonymous, December 21, 2001

Answers

In fairness, though, fancy waking up with a fever to find Clarence sitting on your bed.

-- Anonymous, December 21, 2001

Ah but if it was Shearer..........or in your case Hughes.

-- Anonymous, December 21, 2001

True but my luck would probably dictate a Marcelino/Bassedas/Acuna combo ;)

-- Anonymous, December 21, 2001

how big's your bed Dougal ??

-- Anonymous, December 21, 2001

Plenty big enough for you Loony I'd guess. But of course, you know what they say about..................

Helluva chat-up line mind. Must remember that one over Christmas ;-)

-- Anonymous, December 21, 2001