It's time for the confessional, my child. Bare the truth.

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001

Answers

Elizabeth.

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001

Camille. Or Camielle. My family members spell it differently, all of them, so I feel like I'm a schizo or something whenever I get birthday cards in the mail. I hate it. Absolutely hate it. From Chamomile to Camel to Camilla to Camoflauge, the nicknames are endless. Plus one of my G-ma's likes to call me Cami. I'm like, "I have a name! A real one! Next you'll be calling me Buffy!"

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001

Elizabeth. Duh.

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001

My middle name is Beth, for those of you slow on the uptake.

No, not Elizabeth, just Beth. For a long time I haaaaated it, but it's sort of grown on me. When I asked my mom why not Elizabeth, (which is my grandmother's middle name, and why she picked "beth" in the first place) she said she thought all put together that it was too long. Ooookay.

But worst of all, my last name starts with an M. That's right folks, B.M. As a child, I was mortified, but luckily most kids had no idea what BM was. They all said toot or poopy. But thanks to my mom and her use of "correct" verbiage, I was scared everyone would make the B.M. connection.

You can laugh now.

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001

Get out!!! My middle name is Elizabeth too!

Does this mean I'm a member of the secret club? ;)

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001

Lynn. My secret club forms, uh, somewhere else.

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001

Craig

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001

Browning. My family has the tradition of using the maiden names of women as middle names. My middle name was also my mother's middle name before she was married, but it is actually my great- grandmother's maiden name. We're somehow distantly related to the poet(s), and three of my cousins have my middle name too. I hated having a last name as a middle name for a long time, but now I think it's cool, so I'll probably do it to my kids. Coincidentally, my initials are CBS, so when I was very little I used to tell other kids the network was named after me. And the other little kids believed me. Suckahs.

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001

ann.

how boring is that? not even anne. which really isn't much better.

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001

Lynn. WG, I'm in the club. So's my mom.

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001

Lynn. I'm in RL and WG's club. Yay!

HB, it's funny you mention your initials as BM. My sorority sister, Kara Beth Markham, feels your pain. She *did* get the BM jokes. Hee.

Also, I have a friend with the initials HAM. Poor girl.

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001

Lee. I like it.

When I became a famous movie actress, see, I was just going to go by Jessamyn Lee, because that would be much more glamorous-sounding than my own last name. I have the same middle name as my grandfather (Earl Lee) and my uncle (Earl Lee, Jr.) And if I'd been a boy? Jesse Lee, instead. I like the girl version better.

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001

Nicole

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001

My full name is Kathryn Colleen, my parents wanted to name me after "K.C. and the Sunshine Band" but they had some sort of dilemna with that, so they named me Kathryn Colleen, but have always called me K.C..

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001

Ohh Lord, I am going to let everyone see just how redneck my family and I really are....

My mother wanted to name me "Kirsten Beatrice" (ugh!) but my dad started throwing a fit at the hospital...He decided that I should be Tami Bea so that my name would FIT ON THE BACK OF ONE OF THOSE HAND TOOLED COWBOY BELTS. My mom luckily interjected and got him to agree to Tamara Bea, which over the years I have come to like. Oh yes, and this belt that I was to have gotten? Never seen it. I am hoping for Christmas, but we shall see.

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001

Hannah, actually, but I have been called by my middle name every day of my life. My first name is Mary, which is my mother's middle name, and her mother's first name, and on and on, and none of them actually go by it. It's just a family tradition.

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001

Wow, that's weird. In my school at least half the girls in my grade and the surrounding two had the same middle name as I do. I must be the oldster of the group or people in Ohio are spectacularly uncreative.

It's Marie, btw. And if we are confessing my first name is Sharon, Shae is a nickname. (Actually, Sha was the nickname, to rhyme with Jay for my brother Jason, but people would read it as "Shah" so I added the e.)

And because I never tire of telling this. .. my maiden name was Cox. So my name was Sharon Cox. And if you grow up in Ohio, land of displaced Appalachin coal miners, it's pronounced "Sharin." Say it with me now . . . Sharon Cox.

There was much mocking.

Especially from those familiar with the "M R puppies" joke. Sharon M. Cox. Fuck feminism, I got rid of that name gladly.

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001

Kay.

I've always rather liked it. My best friend in eighth grade and I decided to call each other by our middle names because we thought they were so much cooler than our first names. Her last name was Fish. I suspect she gladly gave that one up when she was married.

I used to go by Missy, but when I was about fourteen, decided I didn't like it any more. The final straw was when I was introduced to a girl and she said "Missy? That's my horse's name!" I've seen someone who goes by Missy on this board, have you ever run across that? Does it bother you?

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001

Melissa - Ha! One of my friends and I did that too! To this day we still address each other as Beth and Michelle on cards and stuff.

Quite funny.

It's my theory that most girls born in the 1970s ended up with either Lynn, Anne, or Marie as a middle name. (And also clearly - Elizabeth.)

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001

Melissa Joy.

Most people call me Melissa or Miss now more than Missy.

For some reason, I have always had a close friend named Melissa/Missy. Different ones over my growing up years, but always one. I always chuckle when I write emails to my friend, Missy. I am sure it looks like I am writing to my alter-ego or something.

The only time I have truly hated being called Missy was when someone told me they had a dog named that. Nice!

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001

I can tell you now that the first WriterSpawn is getting Joseph or Josephine as a middle name, in honor of its late great-grandfather.

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001

My step-family name is Cox. I almost legally changed to Cox after divorcing, to avoid my maiden name, but "Robyn Cox" was too close to "Rubbin Cox".

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001

And well, it's exactly like robbin' cox.

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001

Good call, Robyn. Although I could get a divorce, you could change your name, and we could become lesbian lovers, robbin and sharin cocks.

Although how the lesbian lovers share the cocks after robbing them eludes me.

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001

I'm taking it you're not familiar with the girls with toys porn collection.

(I can't believe I just said that.)

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001

Gah! Not that I am. I just meant that.. if there was such a collection, they would be an example of robbin' and sharin' 'em. Or sometihng.....zzzzzzzzzzzzz.....dlskjaflkjask

I give up. I'm a dirty porn watcher.

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001

My family has the tradition of using the maiden names of women as middle names... Ours does too, on my mom's side, and for the girl babies. But my mother's maiden name, which was originally very very German, was changed when my very German grandfather hit the States - to a very plain Jane "American" surname. So, my mom decided to just skip this generation, figuring it was pointless.

On my dad's side, all the boy babies get the middle name "Jonce." I know, it's odd. I've never heard it anywhere outside our family.

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001

Robyn and little-a alison, I like Lynn fine. It's my first name (Jessica) that I'm really not all that fond of.

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001

Jo. Yes, I was BJ as a kid and much teasing ensued. Now, not only am I BJ, but also BM. but I love my middle name because my mom picked it and I miss her.

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001

Oh, I know what to do with the toys, I too have watched some dirty porn in my time. I was thinking actual stolen Lorena-Bobbitted cocks.

And, uh, now I realize that's just disgusting.

So, right, middle names. rog doesn't have one. Neither does my brother-in-law. My mom thinks it's really odd that both her daughters married men with only two names.

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001

I can't imagine not having a middle name.

Mine is Redmond, my grandmother's maiden name. I used to hate it - I could never go by my middle name and be a "grown up" when all the other girls did, but now that I'm older than that I kinda dig it.

My sister's middle name is Baldwin, and when she was in sixth grade and I was in third, her friends would bribe me to tell them. Constant source of embarrassment, that. Hah, I was such a rotten sister.

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001

Shae, if we were lesbian bandits, we could be robbin' cocks like mad. There are a world of bad names to go with Cox.

Mel Cox

Fanny Cox (Fanny goes well with very little)

Bea Cox

Anita Cox

Freida Cox (possibly my favorite)

Oma Cox

Wanda Cox

Ben T. Cox

The list is endless.

But Sharon Cox is just so very friendly.

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001

Joelle. after my grandpa (mom's dad). I sort've like it though I got a few "noel" jokes back in the day.

at least it's sort've unique.

-- Anonymous, December 06, 2001

I can't believe the 'r' key stuck...stupid sticky keyboard!!

-- Anonymous, December 06, 2001

It's "of"

-- Anonymous, December 06, 2001

Hee, MOC.

What do you all think of the reverse naming (eg my name is Alison Lynn, so my daughter's name would be Lynn Alison and my granddaughter's name would be Alison Lynn, etc) tradition? Admittedly, I don't like the sound of Lynn Alison at all, but I know there are some names that are switchable like that.

I've never met anyone who has participated in it, but it still intrigues me, nonetheless. I could have sworn someone mentioned this above, but I can't find the post for the life of me, now.

-- Anonymous, December 06, 2001

I had a friend whose family did something similar. He was Irish-Catholic and there were like 6 sons (no girls) and the names were like a chain. For example, (and I'm making these up because why in the world would I remember all of this guy's brothers' names??) his name was Brian Patrick, the brother below him was Patrick Michael, the brother below him was Michael Robert and on and on.

-- Anonymous, December 06, 2001

The reverse naming is interesting, I've never heard of that. But the chain naming would have made little, whiny, sensitive kid me be all "I'm not unique, they just wanted another HER!" Then again, it's better than naming all your kids, including the girls, George ala Mr. Foreman.

My sister gave her daughter the same middle name as her own - Donna Jeannine and Cara Jeannine. I kind of my like that, like juinor but cooler. Then again she also did it so her kids (Caleb Justin is the other) have the same initials which was really popular among kids I grew up with. One girl I knew had five siblings and they all had the initial SEG.

-- Anonymous, December 06, 2001

T's family has a cool thing going on in one branch of her family with the initials L.B. She'll have to tell it when she gets back from her jetsetting.

My middle name is Suzanne. It's all right, I guess. My father's family is big on the family name thing. Suzanne is the name of one of my aunts. I hope to continue the tradition myself. Particularly if I have a son, who I hope to name after my dad. He was named after his mother's father, and I think that goes back a few generations. I like that. If I were to have a daughter and name her what I want to name her, there would be much eyebrow raising for various boring reasons.

JoLo doesn't have a middle name, by the way. And, my brother only has a middle initial. Isn't that crazy?! It's K. Doesn't stand for anything! Hilarioius. Mother is still so mad about that. The bro is from her first marraige, and she claims the naming was the work of her evil inlaws and went on during her drug-induced post labor. He's even a ",Jr."

And the MOC's middle name is actually Allen (now I have ruined his mystique!), which is nice with Christopher. Not as good as Meat of Cheese, of course.

-- Anonymous, December 06, 2001

Al - A guy I work with only has a middle initial too. It's D. And he gets really mad if you put a period after it because he's like, it doesn't stand for anything so you can't abbreviate it. It's just D and that's all there is too it. He said he even made them reprint his diploma.

-- Anonymous, December 06, 2001

Craig for me, too.

-- Anonymous, December 06, 2001

Somewhere, Harry S Truman is smiling.

The Smoker's middle name is French. Somehow. I'm not sure how. There's a tradition that the firstborn male in every other generation receives the same name (first and middle), so he has the same name as his grandfather, and if we have a son and the son has a son, that kid gets that name too. Personally I'm hoping that SmokerBro and SmokerSis-in-Law's kids take care of this requirement.

-- Anonymous, December 06, 2001

And it's strange, I forgot to mention, but in my family, my siblings and I went my our middle names, all three of us, at our parents choice. It was a one-time tradition, I guess, since no previous generations did it, and I am the only one who reverted to my first name.

So yeah, when I go home to Texas? I am Craig.

-- Anonymous, December 06, 2001

When you come to Chao Camp, can I call you Craig? That would make me laugh.

-- Anonymous, December 06, 2001

You think only having a middle initial is bad? My friend's father and uncle only have initials, PERIOD. Her father's name is D.W., and her uncle's name is E.H. That's their names. On their birth certificates. So her dad's name in effect is Deedubya, her uncle's Ee-aich.

Yeah, I don't know. The worst part is, the letters don't even stand for anything.

I thought all boys were to be given the middle names Michael or Allen? I am pretty sure that's a national requirement, right?

I have a friend who also inexplicably goes by his middle name with his family. I know him as Richard, but whenever he tells stories about his neices and nephews he is always "Uncle Eric." It's really bizarre to find that somebody you THOUGHT you knew well has this whole other name and persona, almost like an alternate identity.

-- Anonymous, December 06, 2001

You think only having a middle initial is bad? My friend's father and uncle only have initials, PERIOD. Her father's name is D.W., and her uncle's name is E.H. That's their names. On their birth certificates. So her dad's name in effect is Deedubya, her uncle's Ee- aich.

That is the kind of story that makes life worth living.

Hannah, I cannot believe you know someone with the name of "D" - what sort of craziness is THAT?

-- Anonymous, December 06, 2001

I'm outing my brother here for all of the world, but I can't help it. His name is Guy. Yes, Guy. A wonderful, beautiful name that I happen to adore, but my brother thinks he's been cursed. (My great-grandfather's name was Walter but for some reason he went by Guy. My brother's favorite joke is that it's a good thing my dad's grandfather's nickname wasn't Skippy.) So here's the thing, right? His middle name is Hunter (my mom's grandfather's middle name) and he LOVES his middle name. And the kid's moved like 27 times since he graduated high school and so we're always like, just frickin' start going by Hunter already, and he's like, Siiiiiiigh - it's too LATE people! I'm 28!

And I always wanted to name my child, boy or girl, Hunter after my brother and my Papa's father, but now it's all trendy and I can't. Why do people have to steal my family names?

-- Anonymous, December 06, 2001

I'm sorry but if I knew a kid named Guy Hunter when I was young I would have been THRILLED that someone else had a name more worthy of mocking then mine. Guy Hunter, heh.

My grandfather's name was Doctor Clarence Morris. His first name was Doctor. I don't know why other than crazy Appalachin mountain people and their crazy ways. He went by Clarence.

I really want to name a boy Richard Charles as it's after both our fathers (his dad was Richard Charles, my dad is Charles Edward). But I want to call him Charlie to save him all the dick stuff from Richard. Turns out my father hates Charlie and Chuck and I think Charles is a bit much to saddle a little baby with so who knows what we'll do now.

rog is all into initials spelling a word. He wants to give himself a middle name that starts with O so his initials spell rog. So we discussed Olivia as a girl's name which led to naming her Olivia Rname so her initials are org and we can register org.org for her. This amuses me far too much and I'm probably just mean enough to do it to a kid.

-- Anonymous, December 06, 2001

You know what? Until just NOW I never even saw the "guy hunter" thing. You're a mind warper!

My dad's name is Dick. He doesn't even pretend to go by Rich or Richard. I hate the name Dick. HATE it. Awful.

-- Anonymous, December 06, 2001

SmokerDad's first name: Merlin.

Now I ask you: how could you not want a Merlin as your daddy- in-law?

-- Anonymous, December 06, 2001

Is Smoker's Dad Merlin Olsen?!?!

Maybe you guys can answer me this: why would a family wait until they have their SECOND son to name him after the father? Their second son is the Junior. Is it me, or are my in-laws crazy?

I love how the guy's name is Doctor. Who needs medical school, right? ;) If he did become an MD, his name would be "Doctor Doctor." That's like straight out of Airplane. I have heard of people named Judge (as in Reinhold) but never Doctor. Speaking of Junior, my dad's cousin is married to a man whose name is Junior. On his birth certificate. Apparently they didn't want to cause any undue confusion by having the same names, so they skipped all that mess and went right for the Junior.

-- Anonymous, December 06, 2001

I used to work for Richard Weiner. He went by Dik.

-- Anonymous, December 06, 2001

Can I tell you a true tale of parents setting up a child to have low self esteem? My mother is one of five children. In order, from oldest to youngest, their names are... Judy, Jerry, Janet, Barbara and Jack.

Yep, my mother's the Barbara and she's not even the youngest. Sing with me here...one of these things is not like the other..

-- Anonymous, December 06, 2001

Oh, Catherine. So sad.

I mean, I laughed, but it's still sad. Don't tell your mom.

-- Anonymous, December 06, 2001

I love this thread.

There is all kinds of family-name craziness in my clan. My parents are Betty Jo and Ronald Wayne. They go by Jo and Wayne. I have 3 siblings. We are John Keith, Jeffrey Wayne, Julie Kristine, and (get this) Jennifer Jo.

John Keith and I have matching initials. When he was little, my mother was a complete freak about his name. No one was allowed to call him Johnny or John-John or anything other that John. I'm just glad they had the sense not to name him John Wayne, they went with Keith, after my uncle, instead. And, that uncle has two sons: David Keith and Daniel Wayne.

I was supposed to be named Jennifer, because my mom loves that name, but her sister had a daughter about six months before I was born and named her Jennifer. My name was stolen! Personally, I like Julie better.

And as far as my name, my mom wanted it to be Julie Christine, but she was drugged out from having me and Dad filled out the paperwork and spelled it wrong, Kristine. In college my friends started calling me Julie-Kay and it stuck, which is ok with me.

My poor sister has been called Jenny-Jo by most of the family for most of her life. In high school she started going by Jo, which is what all her friends still call her, so both mom and sister are Jo. Neither of them resemble Nancy McKeon, though.

I'm just glad I wasn't named Julie Jo.

-- Anonymous, December 06, 2001

Catherine, that is so mean. Your poor Mom.

What I don't get is when people just apparently give up. My brother- in-law is the youngest of 6. They all have middle names but him, like they couldn't be bothered to come up with just ONE more name.

(With rog he was just Baby Boy Gleason for a few weeks because he wasn't expected to live and then they had to come up with a name for some official thing and weren't prepared. That I can understand.)

-- Anonymous, December 06, 2001

Man, this is cracking me up.

Catherine, if I was your mom, I'd be glad I wasn't one of the J names. I don't know why people think that letter thing is so cute, 'cause it ain't.

Of course, this opinion comes to you straight from someone who wants to saddle a child with the name Martha.

My parent's next door neighboor: Richard Head. And, he's a realtor, so it's on signs all over B'ham.

-- Anonymous, December 06, 2001

Yeah, J names.

My brother and sister: John and Jamie.

My brother's kids: Justin, Jordan, Joshua. My sister's kid: Jennifer.

When I was pregnant, my sister-in-law was brainstorming names. First one out of her mouth: Jonah. No 'J' names, I said. I almost succeeded, my son's name is Matthew, but his middle name is John. But for a good reason, it's his great-grandfather's name.

-- Anonymous, December 06, 2001

I have some cousins who gave all their kids G names. Glen, Ginger, Gene, and Gail. Not cute!

Speaking of G names, my friend Brandon's middle name is Gig. That cracks me up. I can see him now. "hey baby, this Gig is UP!"

IN Conway, there was a realtor named Dick Longing. Yep that's how it was spelled and how it showed up on the signs. Stealing those signs and putting them in dorm rooms became quite the coup in Arkansas.

-- Anonymous, December 06, 2001

Craig for me, too.

I just like that, as a Michael Craig, my first two initials are MC. So I could really become a rapper, call myself MC B-----, and not be making anything up.

Actually, that's not such a bad idea.

-- Anonymous, December 06, 2001

Hannah, I never before thought about the homoerotic connotations of your brother's name. Huh.

My middle name is Lynn. I have four younger sisters who have very cool middle names that come from women in our family - Bonnabel, my maternal grandmother's maiden name, Maxey, my paternal grandmother's maiden name, Duke, my paternal great-grandmother's maiden name, and Lacey, my mother's maiden name. It's like after two kids (my brother's middle name is Gary), my parents all of a sudden put some thought into their children's middle names.

Of course, I'm the only one of the six of us who has a baby book, so there you go. And I'm dropping my middle name in May, anyway.

-- Anonymous, December 06, 2001

I love 'names' threads....I have 2 middle names sort of, one being the one my parents gave me, and the other my mother's maiden name and which got tacked in there during sorority rush, neither of which are fit for public consumption, and I will likely give my kids two middle names as well, which bodes well for my future daughter, because if I decide to name her after my own mother and grandmothers, her initials will be S.H.I.T. With a last name that ends in T, my husband and I love to come up with name combos for the spawn that spell out horrible things.

-- Anonymous, December 06, 2001

Now, Kristin, you are not playing in the spirit of the confessional thread if you tease us by telling us that you have middle names, but won't share them.

I move that Kristin ponies up - do I have a second?

-- Anonymous, December 07, 2001

Second.

Hannah, I never before thought about the homoerotic connotations of your brother's name. Huh.

And T, we shall neve speak of this again.

-- Anonymous, December 07, 2001

I knew a family that gave all the boys "T" names after the father, and the girls "C" names after the mother. Except the T names they chose were Travis, Trevor, and Tevis.

And the C name they chose was Cinnamon.

-- Anonymous, December 07, 2001

Oh man, that's bad. Was the mom's name Candy? You can't even WORK with Cinnamon. Like, unless you totally change it and go by Cindy. And even then....

-- Anonymous, December 07, 2001

One of my friends clients (in our law students clinic) was a hooker whose real name was Candace Kane. She went by Candy.

-- Anonymous, December 07, 2001

I move that Kristin ponies up - do I have a second?

Yes, yes you do.

-- Anonymous, December 07, 2001

I don't have a middle name.

-- Anonymous, December 09, 2001

HB, the mom's name WAS Candy. What are you, psychic?

-- Anonymous, December 09, 2001

Hey smerch - am I the only one here who doesn't know you?

-- Anonymous, December 09, 2001

Nah, I just came across this site when I was looking for a mathematics forum. I'm not a regular here.

-- Anonymous, December 10, 2001

And were you totally disappointed? We can start a thread on differential equations if you want.

-- Anonymous, December 10, 2001

Hey, I almost got an A in differential equations! And I still have my Calculus textbook.

What thread was this again?

-- Anonymous, December 10, 2001

Back to the topic... :)

My middle name is Mae. I remember beind super disappointed when I found out that you don't spell it like the month, because all the cool girls in my school were named things like April and Spring, and I thought (in my seven year old mind) that having a middle name spelled like a month would help to make me popular.

Now, I love the way that it's spelled. I am named after my great- grandmother, who raised my mother and took care of me for the first few years of my life. She died when I was five, and I'm glad that I have that part of her.

-- Anonymous, January 01, 2002

Leigha, not only is that sweet because it's about family, but also, you are from the A-town, so, you rock.

And, because i promised: Jan, 1, 2002, 5:42 am CST
Merry New Year's, yall!

-- Anonymous, January 01, 2002

I've gotta stop reading these archives, too many good topics!!! Anywho, my middle name is Hallie which I love because it's part of a story. My mom was born with a hole between the two sides of her heart and at the time open heart surgery was a very chancy thing. It wasn't until her early 20s that she had corrective surgery. She needed a heart-lung machine and everything. Yowch. Her two doctors were Dr. Kay and Dr. Zimmerman. My mom decided to name me after the two docs but Zimmerman was a bit of a mouthful so I ended up Kay Hallie. My mum thought Hallie was a French feminine form of Henry (Dr. Zimm's first name). Turns out it's not, but I love the name, and the history behind it. To add to the goodness, my first name can be written in Japanese with a character that means 'blessed.' Not too shabby, ne?

-- Anonymous, March 14, 2002

My middle name is Elizabeth, after my grandmother. However, nicely combined with Dawn (after my father Don, don't ask me how you get Dawn rather than Donna from Don) and my last initial of D, you get the lovely initials of DED...yep, dead. Really thought that one out didn't they?

-- Anonymous, March 14, 2002