Dear Exalted Idiots,

I was flatulating with my friends one day and I noticed that only mine seemed to smell pleasant. Then I applied this to a much broader scale and realized that this holds true for every single person. Oh great holders of wisdom--how do you explain such a phenomena?

-- Justin Heinrichsen Vashmoisska III (skliaj@rpi.edu), November 10, 2001

Answers

Back whe' I came from, erryone spoke in Flatulese. O'viously dese people you are frien's with don't be speakin' the same dialec' as you wit' da Flatulese. Make yo'self a tuna and cheese, spark up a menthol, and curl up wit' yo' kittens to some Game Show Network. You'll be glad ya did!

Love always, smooches, and a stogie, Latwanda

-- Latwanda Ezmerelda Boutros-Boutros Bushika Smith (asklatwanda@sheeridiocy.net), December 05, 2001.