Hmm. "The Private Side"

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Anyone seen the new additional club calendar, "The Private Side" that has portraits of twelve of our players (vaseline over the lens effect where necessary). It's interesting because it's about the first bit of marketing that I can remember that is so clearly targeted at the laydees......

-- Anonymous, November 08, 2001

Answers

Cue Official Statement saying, "We at NUFC believe that our female supporters can lust after players while keeping their credentials as knowledgeable football fans and this unique calendar offers them an opportunity to satisfy both aspects of their affection for NUFC".

-- Anonymous, November 08, 2001

**flips back to Mr. October and Mr. January 2001***

Ermmm....they think we aren't lusting after them in the normal calendar already?

So, is this new calendar worth the money? ;-)

-- Anonymous, November 08, 2001


I saw it advertised and I think Cort is on the front.

Interesting to see who else in there, those they think are good looking enough to get the girlies buying the calendar.

I suppose Bellamy isn't in there then?

'The Private Side' sounds like some dodgy porno site.

-- Anonymous, November 08, 2001


Bobby Robson is on the December page in a Spandex Santa outfit ;)

-- Anonymous, November 08, 2001

Just thinking..........are there really 12 of our players who would look good posing in the arty style of this calendar?

I've got to buy one!

-- Anonymous, November 08, 2001



They haven't actually gone on sale yet and they are apparently "limited editions" but I got e mailed some blurb with one or two of the pix. They m ay be going on sale this weekend, I guess... Ciara, I think they are £6.99 so it's probably worth it on general principles alone...

-- Anonymous, November 08, 2001

They should do one with some women in Newcastle tops, I'm sure that would sell well.

-- Anonymous, November 08, 2001

Paul, cue, SuperKev on about dogs...

-- Anonymous, November 08, 2001

Tops painted on would sell better.



-- Anonymous, November 08, 2001


Aye, tops painted on, and they could be gradually "painted off" as the year goes on...

They did that with a Match of the Day calendar, with top European club strips painted onto women with ample sized frontage. My mate had one, it came free with the magazine, it was only small 4 inch squares though.

What are the players' wives like? Surely a calendar could be made out of them? You could make a whole decade's worth out of Dyer's last 120 ex's.

-- Anonymous, November 08, 2001



wouldn't mind seeing Jordan fill out a B&W meownself..... 3: : P

-- Anonymous, November 08, 2001

Paul, your mate with the ample frontage he got free in a magazine, its not Gav is it?

-- Anonymous, November 08, 2001

Dougal or Steph, if it is limited could one of you pick one up for me? It's enough of a job finding the regular calendar after Christmas, so that one probably won't be available at all. Not sure there's 12 Toon players who float my boat in that sense anymore(with Gallacher and Big Dunc gone we're already down 2), but sure Shearer's gotta be in there so worth the price. :-D

-- Anonymous, November 08, 2001

Mrs gus would only like one if Steve Harpers in it, not that she is into that sort of thing.

-- Anonymous, November 08, 2001

Thinking about it, I imagine it would be:

Given

Barton-Hughes-Dabizas-Elliott

Solano-Dyer-Speed-Robert

Shearer-Cort

With Harper on the bench.

Given is the spitting image of a gay friend of mine who is also Irish and is the biggest queen bitch on the planet so I can never quite take him seriously although I guess he is relatively good-looking. Barton's flowing locks make him a candidate while Hughes speaks for himself. Dabs has sort of swarthy Greek looks and might photo well while I suppose Robbie Elliott would get the call of seniority at right back but Bernard is probably the better looking. In midfield, Solano could look soulful and Dyer has boyish athleticism. Speed used to model clothes for Top Shop so he'd know how to work the camera while Robert has that Gallic charm and apparently takes showers (allegedly unlike a former incumbent of the left wing who thought "Ze laydees, zey like zee musk"). Shearer just has to be there and Cort is better looking than Bellamy.

-- Anonymous, November 09, 2001



Sorry, everyone, I'm feeling a bit giddy and light-headed today: it must be the snow. Or maybe the Prozac is finally kicking in.

-- Anonymous, November 09, 2001

Sorry to disappoint Dougal but the dog reference from yesterday was aimed at the directors NOT the good womenfolk of Newcasle and its surrounds.

However I feel that it would be wrong of me to NOT mention Peter Beardsley in a thread about calenders.Is he on the 13th month?

-- Anonymous, November 09, 2001


Sorry, Kev: I seem to remember a few "dog" comments when you first came on but it may have been one of the people (Barbarian??) who were also here at the time.

Leave Pedro alone.

-- Anonymous, November 09, 2001


I cannot recall myself making an issue about the dog comments at all. Remember where I live.Therefore it would be against all the females in my area as well. But you have to admit,it is a very easy target.

-- Anonymous, November 09, 2001

Not really, Kev: they referred to women in the North East which may make it an easy target for supporters from other clubs, it's probably best left alone by your lot.

-- Anonymous, November 09, 2001

Dougal your description of Given's doppleganger has me ROTFL! You're assessment of our hunk potential is very good. We do seem to have enough for a calendar, though not all of them fit my personal preference. I do think we need to find a way to field 2 keepers however. I just can't leave Harper on the bench again after he was so unceremoniously dumped from teh 2001 calendar. I might swap him for Dyer. Ok, so Harps isn't normally a midfielder, but he's capable of scoring his share of goals(in training anyway!) and he'd give us a bit more height in the middle. ;-))

-- Anonymous, November 09, 2001

Ciara, Harper is apparently canny up front and is occasionally a nominated penalty-taker in Cup games so, on that basis, we can have him instead of Cort?

-- Anonymous, November 09, 2001

That could work. Actually I seem to remember reading somewhere that Harper did play as a forward in his earlier years.

-- Anonymous, November 09, 2001

Actually, Ciara, I have just remembered one of Donagh's (my Shay lookalike) bitchy comments. We were in Selfridges and he was looking at suits. This shop assistant was giving us a bit of attitude and said, "How much would sir like to spend?". Donagh replied, "Oh, about £600" to which the assistant replied with a sneering smirk and "Well, Sir, if you're on a budget, I suggest you try M&S" to which Donagh replied, "Lose the attitude, sweetie, you're a shop assistant". I was utterly gobsmacked. So, when Shay makes a great save, I always get images of him saying "Lose the attitude, sweetie, you're only a shit centre forward".

-- Anonymous, November 09, 2001

LOL!

-- Anonymous, November 09, 2001

Just though, Number 12 should really be Zidane for Susie's benefit. He suits black and white and maybe the usual calendar rumours about who's leaving would be replaced with rumours about who's joining. He's meant to be dead miserable at Real ;)

-- Anonymous, November 11, 2001

But would she want him on the bench or on pitch in the starting XI? ;-)

-- Anonymous, November 11, 2001

I think she'd want him in the starting line-up but I think we could over-rule her, then bring him on when everyone's knackered to re- ignite things ;)

-- Anonymous, November 11, 2001

The power of fresh legs late in the match can make all the difference. ;-)

-- Anonymous, November 11, 2001

Might make Dyer turn it on.

-- Anonymous, November 11, 2001

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