Yahoo.com Oct 16, 2001

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Prostitutes Blast Soccer Coach for Team Slur

BERLIN (Reuters) - German sex workers lashed out at Energie Cottbus's team coach Eduard Geyer for comparing his under-performing players to prostitutes in Hamburg's notorious St. Pauli red-light district, Bild newspaper said on Tuesday.

``There are players whose view of performance is like the whores of St. Pauli,'' Geyer said after a recent loss. ``All they do is smoke cigarettes, drink too much and sleep around.''

Prostitutes in St. Pauli told Bild that Geyer had not only insulted their profession -- but he didn't have a clue as to how hard they actually work.

``Geyer should send his boys over here to see how hard we work,'' said Vanessa, a 21-year-old prostitute. ``They could learn a thing or two from us. I work 12 to 14 hours every day -- sometimes two weeks straight without a day off.''

She said she doesn't drink alcohol and stays fit through regular weight training -- and by eating lots of fruit.

Kalle Schwensen, a well-known community figure in St. Pauli, added: ``If Geyer's team were in as good condition as the whores on St. Pauli they'd be in first place in the Bundesliga.''

Another prostitute named Lady Gina, 35, said that she would be happy to put Geyer's team through her training program.

``Our job is a lot harder than theirs,'' she said.

-- (Helmut@Hamburg.DE), October 17, 2001

Answers

What's the smelliest thing in the world?

An anchovie's pussy.

-- (Gunter@hure.garten), October 17, 2001.

When would "Vanessa" have time to weight train?

-- David L (bumpkin@dnet.net), October 17, 2001.

Depending on the night, I imagine she could be hefting or supporting quite a bit of weight.

-- Jack Booted Thug (governmentconspiracy@NWO.com), October 17, 2001.

Those ho's make a good beer.

-- (Roland@hatemail.com), October 18, 2001.