I was raised in the country and have always been a very solitary person. Now I find myself living in the city, in a dorm, with a roommate. I know some off you folks live in the city. How do handle it?! I'm really at my wits end! So many people, all the time! Does anyone have any tips for keeping things natural in the city? Thanks!

-- Elizabeth in WV (lividia66@aol.com), October 09, 2001

Answers

read,, read read,, and get a plant or 2, something from home,, cant hurt

-- stan (sopal@net-port.com), October 09, 2001.

Seek out places where you can be alone. It is possible to be "alone" even when surrounded by people. Perhaps you seek a quiet spot. Try the library where you can relax and read magazines or do homework. Everyone needs time alone and as I remember the only time you have alone in your room is when your roommate is at class or gone for the week-end, etc.. And give yourself time. You will adjust somewhat.

-- conniein nm (karrelandconnie@msn.com), October 09, 2001.

I would agree with Stan. Read, Read, Read. You are in the perfect place to find material on country living. Look in the yellow pages for used book stores. You can find all kinds of used books at a good price by going to used book store, yard sales and flea markets. Look also in thrift stores. Believe me - they are out there. Start building a collection of resource material. Check out the local library - they sometimes have used book sales. I just attended one in my area and got a bag full of books for only $16. All of them were on homesteading issues. (Gardening, wood stoves, berry growing, ect.) Don't overlook antique stores either. You know they used to teach agriculture in schools and you can still find some of the old school books out there. (These are great and full of information.)

You can also grow sprouts right where you live. It takes little space and it's good food. That keeps your hands involved in growing something.

For years I was a "want-a-be". It was during that time that I did a lot of reading - living in apartments and moveing every few years. That was a time to build a resource library.

Hope this helps.

-- Tom S. (trdsshepard@yahoo.com), October 09, 2001.

Lock yourself in the bathroom!

-- Ardie from WI (ardie54965@hotmail.com), October 09, 2001.

If all the people bother you, one thing that helps is to walk around with your headphones on (don't turn on the walkman, or have it on very low for safety reasons) and if you're sitting down, keep yourself busy with a book. Use your body language to indicate that you'd rather be by yourself.

-- GT (nospam@nospam.com), October 09, 2001.

Many cities have small garden plots that they rent for small sums to gardeners. I would think that would be a nice way to get back in touch with the earth. Even though it's fall, you can still plant overwintered crops and prepare the ground for planting next spring.

-- Laura Rae Jensen (lrjensen@nwlink.com), October 10, 2001.

You may want to link up with birders, native plant/wildflower lovers, and/or star gazers. They know all the quiet, undisturbed, unpolluted places around you. Garden clubs are nice retreats.

-- paul (primrose@centex.net), October 10, 2001.

Elizabeth -- I found the same thing when I moved to Toronto under similar circumstances. Too many people, too much noise, and not enough trees!

I ended up living there for 9 years, and I survived. There were only two things I had to do.

1 -- Take refuge in the library. The library is a place where quiet and solitude is expected. Anyone bugs you there -- just tell them "I'm sorry -- I have an exam next week that I have to study for. Could we talk later?"

2 -- Appreciate the city for what it is. Gather experiences, even if they are only to reinforce to yourself what is really important.

Good luck!

-- Tracy (trimmer31@hotmail.com), October 10, 2001.

On the headphones idea, you can get tapes (and probably CD's) of nature sounds, such as a meadow with birdsong, or a babbling brook. Listening to them can help a lot!

-- Joy F [in So. Wisconsin] (CatFlunky@excite.com), October 10, 2001.

There are several not for profit parks/land reservations etc and county run working farms here in Southern NY that are desperate for volunteers, perhaps you could find a similar org. in your area to vist/volunteer, nice way pass the time as you like and meet people of the the same interest.

-- Kathy (catfish201@hotmail.com), October 10, 2001.

1). Use the time in the city to build towards a goal. Save like crazy, spend as little as possible. If there are things you feel you need, then try to save so you can pay cash for them, preferably second-hand. You can, for instance, buy "demonstrator" cars which are near-new, still carry new-car warranty, but have already take the big price drop that a new car takes when you drive it off the lot. If you can't get what you need (NOTE - wants don't count, only needs) without a loan, then try to pay the loan off as fast as possible - this means most of your payments are going on principle, rather than being wasted on interest.

2). The above ideas about growing things are worthwhile. A couple of pots of herbs, plus some sprouts, is easy, tasty, and keeps you in touch with real things.

3). Try to stay in touch with your roots. Get someone at home to package up the small-town-and-district newspapers every fortnight or so and send them to you. They should probably include a letter as well. You'd be surprised how much those newspapers mean to you, and how much big-city tension just seeps away while you're reading them.

4). Libraries - yes. They're fairly heavy establishments, and worth their weight in gold - at least. While you can't be alone at home, and you can't be alone in the library, you can be more-or-less anonymous and unpressured in the library. Presumably if you're in a dorm then you're studying - just spending a couple of hours a night every night in a local library can take care of most of your studying, and the simple discipline of just going out and doing it is better than hoping you'll get it done in the privacy of your own home.

-- Don Armstrong (darmst@yahoo.com.au), October 11, 2001.

Does your dorm have a flat roof? Maybe a fold up chair and unbrella, maybe the house mother (if they still have them) is from the country also.....

-- mitch hearn (moopups@citlink.net), October 11, 2001.

I moved to the city three years ago. I had been living on 40 remote acres, surrounded by very large parcels, 80-600 acres, and had gotten used to the solitude. I moved into a mobile home park and can hear the freeway. It's amazing what a person will become accustomed to. If you stay long enough anywhere I believe you will end up assimilating. At first I couldn't stand the noise, the fire and police sirens, the cars and the press of traffic. Even the lights of the city, all this just really grieved me. I even remember how I noticed how everyones car was just so clean, my car had always been dusty from the dirt road. When I used to visit the city, I used to wonder: "what do all these city people do?" I always enjoyed the quiet walks, the privacy, and my dogs and chickens and petting my horses and gardening and the really "wildness" of my place. Hearing coyotes at night and watching hawks fly during the day. I could go for a walk, at least 8 hours and never see another person, of course I could make a point of going to the neighbors, they were only 1/2 mile away. Now in the city, you do other things, I walk the local river and around my neighborhood,going to the library, and I end up staying inside a whole lot more, and now it doesn't bother me as much to see people so close. I think people in the city have blinders on, you know people are there but you just don't see, not like you would if they were comming down the gravel driveway back at the Ranch.

-- EZ (angelgirly2@hotmail.com), October 14, 2001.

I used to live in Manhattan, NYC. To keep my sanity, I walked almost daily in Central Park with my field guides and identified birds and plants. I became an 'urban naturalist.' I went to the Natural History Museum quite often and the Central Park Zoo every day at lunchtime. I also read a lot about the country.

-- amy (acook@in4web.com), October 14, 2001.