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Thursday next is National Poetry Day
Where the scholars and writers come out to play
But where do our little group's efforts fit in?
'Twixt a bottle o'dog and large double gin!Yet fret not, far away Ciara and closer Softie
For there is time yet to express your poetry
In verses of some lengthy and some writ in prose
So long as it makes sense and eventually in the end not too long to ensure it flowsSo come forth young scribes and share your talents
For the great and the good we will find some balance
Fair better, or worse, we'll all need some hints
To find out how best to wind up the chimps ;-)A clarion call, a cry o'er depths comes
Give your best, my fine Mags, a poem for makems!
-- Anonymous, October 01, 2001
http://www.poetrysoc. com/npd/npdindex.htm
-- Anonymous, October 01, 2001
there once was a man from Nantucket....
-- Anonymous, October 01, 2001
(Yer have to say it out loud ter get it)There was a young man from Strathclyde
Who fell down a toilet and died
He had a young brother
WHo fell down another
And now they're interred side by side
-- Anonymous, October 01, 2001
There was a young girl from DevizesHad breasts of two different sizes
One was so small
There was nothing at all
And the other was big and won prizes
-- Anonymous, October 01, 2001
When Lady Low-Bodice swoonsHer bosoms pop out like balloons
The butler stands by
Ne'er a gleam in his eye
And ladles them back with warmed spoons.
-- Anonymous, October 01, 2001
There was a young Vampire called mabel,
Whos periods were exceptionally unstable,
One night at full moon,
She pulled out a spoon,
and drank herself under the table. sorry !!!!
-- Anonymous, October 02, 2001
Nymphomaniacal Jill used dynamite to give her a thrill they found her vagina in North Carolina and bits of her tits in Brasil
-- Anonymous, October 02, 2001
She stood on the bridge at midnight,
Her lips, were all a quiver,
she gave a cough
Her tits fell off , and floated down the river.
-- Anonymous, October 02, 2001
I hoped for something a little more intellectual...but,There was a young lady from Ealing
Who claimed to have no sexual feeling
'Till a cynic, called Boris,
Just touched her clitoris
And she had to be scraped from the ceiling
-- Anonymous, October 02, 2001
There was a young woman called Blod Dreamt she was having an affair with god But it wasn't the almighty who lifted her nightie, It was Roger the lodger, the sod.
-- Anonymous, October 02, 2001
There was a young man from Cape Horn
Who wished he'd never been born
He wouldn't have been if his old man had seen
The end of the condom was torn.
-- Anonymous, October 05, 2001
A old lady from Ashington's car
Hit some ice and ran into a kerb.
The car was ok, but there was hell to pay
Cos his burb a jurb week was curtailed prematurely.
-- Anonymous, October 05, 2001
There was a man from BelgraveWho kept a dead whore in a cave.
He said, "I admit
I'm a bit of a shit,
But think of the money I save!"
-- Anonymous, October 06, 2001
There was a young fella from Buckingham Who stood on the bridge down at Uppingham Watching the stunts Of the c*nts in the punts And the tricks if the pr!cks that were f***in' 'em
-- Anonymous, October 06, 2001
...... hardly a literary extravanganza, then!
Good chuckle mind.
-- Anonymous, October 06, 2001
I disagree Clarky. Surely these are among the finest examples of iambic pentameter in the language?
-- Anonymous, October 06, 2001
Iambic PentameterWasn't he one of the greek back seventeen who was substituted ?
-- Anonymous, October 06, 2001
There once was a man called Pete Saul who had a rectangular ball. The square of its weight was his penis plus eight, minus half of three fifths of fuck all
-- Anonymous, October 06, 2001
do not read this oneThere was a young lady called hitchin
sat scratching her c**t in the kitchen
her mother said 'Rose
its the pox I suppose'
She said 'b****x get on with your knitting'
-- Anonymous, October 06, 2001
Deep from the crypt at St Giles
Came a cry that echoed for miles.
"Oh goodness gracious!"
Said Father Ignatious.
Has the Bishop forgotten the Vicar has piles?
-- Anonymous, October 07, 2001