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Darn - no picture.......

Authorities can't do anything about 7-foot phallic carving Thursday, September 20, 2001

THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

LACEY -- A 7-foot phallic carving made from a tree stump is drawing plenty of complaints, but authorities say there's nothing they can do about it.

Two American flags fly from the top of the carving in the driveway at the home rented by Jean Paul "J.P." Parshall on Union Mills road about five miles east of the state Capitol in Olympia and 45 miles south of Seattle.

"It's not like there's a law against what he's got," Thurston County sheriff's Capt. Dan Kimball said. "People have the right to have poor taste."

To Alexia Sandifer, who takes her 6-year-old daughter to school along the road, the flags add insult to injury.

"To me, that's just not something a 6-year-old needs to view." Sandifer said. "Go put it in a carving show, not where children can see it."

Parshall, 25, a builder at J&M Steel who carved the phallus in a week during the summer, said the flags are a gesture of support for the nation.

"The landlord wanted to take the tree down. I was sitting there one day and thinking, 'I know what I can make out of that.' I told him to leave a 7- or 8-foot section," he said. "I get all kinds of amusement out of that thing."

Young people driving by honk and whistle, and on one recent morning an older couple got out of their car to salute the carving, Parshall said.

He said he made the phallus partly to get some laughs but also "because I can do it and nobody can say anything about it."

Parshall's handiwork is protected under the First Amendment to the Constitution, Kimball agreed.

"I sent one of the lieutenants out there, but he said he didn't know what we could do about it and neither do I," he said. "We don't have a county ordinance that I know of that says you can't carve your tree into a penis."

Parshall has more plans in store for the phallus, too. When the rainy season begins, he said, he plans to cover the top with an oversized condom to promote safe sex.

Later in the year he plans to move it onto his porch and adorn it with Christmas lights.

-- Anonymous, September 21, 2001

Answers

Wonder if hubby will let me adorn his with Christmas lights........

-- Anonymous, September 21, 2001

ROTFLMAO

no lights on mine, please. they get too hot!

Not telling how long the light string would have to be, either...

-- Anonymous, September 21, 2001

Show it some catnip. Carl will tell you how that works.

-- Anonymous, September 21, 2001

I can see the men in the neighborhood cringing as the cats discover the new scratching post.... and their wifes smiling....

-- Anonymous, September 21, 2001

As someone has pointed out on another forum, the guy must (not?) have a 'vette.

-- Anonymous, September 21, 2001