Hi just thought I'd inform you of another great toon win this week, following the Boro victory and the trophy success v Bedlington. Here in Sydney our very own ' Toon doon under' overcame a team of cockneys to beat the London hoodoo ( well kind of ) . With a depleted squad of Andy(Al) Abbey , Lolo Murray (Sting) , Billy the Fish Hill ( Tynedale man) , and new signing Tony Lua Lua the Toon did themselves some justice . With Nobby Raphael on International Duty ( much to the managers digust ) and Ken 'Cort' Murray ( Muzzainoz) on the treatment table for a torn calf muscle , it looked like Newcastles indoor four a side squad were in for a difficult second game of the season . The toon were under the kosh for much of the first half , playing lots of close quarter stuff but failed to penetrate the opposition defence . Instead BTFH in goal was required to pull off a string of fine saves , making up for his Given-esque cock up from the week before . Several timely tackles from Al chasing back and Lolo running himself into the ground could not stop the Southerners going one up , poor marking at the back post and a sloppy challenge at the front post giving away another set piece goal . The toon tactics of taking it easy ( very ! ) in the first half proved a well calculated (?) plan , and the opposition were ran ragged in the second half (honest man , you should've seen wor ). Al scoring an equaliser on the break , after Tony Lua Lua provided a through ball . Lolo then came into his own pulling defenders this way and that ( in a badminton court sized pitch ) , before picking the ball up on the halfway line , turning his marker running the full length of the pitch , and unleashing an unstoppable shot across the face of the dumbstruck keeper . Toon 2 Cockneys 1 . Meanwhile at the other and Billy the fish was sprawling all over the floor and keeping the opposition at bay . Then with just five minutes to go , a failure to close down the man , and an unsighted ( !! ) BTFH between the posts saw the ball fly behind him for the equaliser . Newcastle ( donned in assorted black and white shirts and shorts from the present and years gone by ) , laid siege to the opposition box , before Al turned in classic style and lashed the ball home from outside the box to make the score 3-2 and three frenetic minutes to go . A minute from time the fish like keeper charged out to the opposition and as the ball flicked off his head , Lolo almost decapitated him with his boot as the ball flicked the top of the bar and finished out of play . The fish like character was doused in water and the cut to his heed treated and came back to life to complete a hero's game out on the pitch in defence and the Toon held out for a deserved three points . Tony Lua Lua a late entry in the squad ( bought on the ' yer have to be a Geordie to play in this side yer knaa ' transfer deadline ) will surely retain his place as the injured Cort warms up the bench . The lads then visited the Glasgow Arms for a few Schooners of VB and to watch highlights of the real Toon doing the business on the Telly , albeit with a large amount of interference or was that just the amount of local brew I'd consumed ? The cockneys in the pub post match were far from magnanimous touting a number of poor refereing decisions from the Scottish official . I though he was turtely impartial leuk . We were then reported to be Jammy Jeordies in the local press this morning by the unconsolable opposition. As BTFH said in his quote to Sydney Morning Herald reporters today ' I divvent knaa aboot Jammy Jeordies like , id say that lad was illiterate , cannit yer see by the bump on me heed ? We're Gammy Geordies man woman man .' Further match reports to follow as the season develops and players come back from injury and soujourns home :-))

-- Anonymous, September 11, 2001

Answers

Australian Premiership

-- Anonymous, September 11, 2001

will I ever get my spot back .... or was that spotty back ??

-- Anonymous, September 11, 2001

Geordies here, Geordies their, Geordies every f*kk1ng where. La la la la la la la laaaaa!

-- Anonymous, September 11, 2001

Is there nothing this side can cannot do? Hope you gave a fair share of your specialty tackling to our ex-pat cockneys :- )

-- Anonymous, September 11, 2001