Maryland beat the crap out of North Carolina in its season opener, an optimistic start to the football season. I watched the game with my brother, and we were both yelling at the TV as though it would have an impact on the game (which, of course, it did). My sister-in-law probably was ready to have us committed ... but the Terps won 23-7, so it's all good. Besides, she knows the worst is yet to come, once basketball season starts.

What team/sport makes you go crazy? And how crazy do you get?

-- Anonymous, September 05, 2001

Answers

I have been known to get crazy about basketball. I know y'all weren't aware of that, but it's true, especially if it involves Latrell or Alverson. If the Sixers would trade Iverson to the Knicks, all would be right in my world.

Oh, and when MJ comes back and kicks the living shit out of that little bitch Kobe Bryant.

-- Anonymous, September 05, 2001

Buckeye football starts Saturday. I looooooommmmmm me some Buckeye football. It's like a disease in this town. But really, drinking and watching football on a gorgeous Fall Ohio day? Who wouldn't want to be infected with that?

-- Anonymous, September 05, 2001

See, I'm in craziness limbo. Rooting for Duke just isn't what it was when I was 12 and desperately wanted to feel like part of something bigger and more successful. The Braves -- the local papers have taken to referring to it as "America Online's team" -- can only go downhill, and besides I never forgave Bobby Cox for throwing a game to the Mets in the '99 playoffs.

-- Anonymous, September 05, 2001

Mike. I cannot believe you would twist the knife like this.

Alabama lost to UCLA AGAIN Saturday. You can only imagine my reaction.

-- Anonymous, September 05, 2001

Well, Al, I guess that's is what happens when ya'll go stealing coaches! Go Frogs!

-- Anonymous, September 05, 2001

I'm a mad keen fan of AFL (that would be the football game with no rules played on a cricket ground). I can't watch for more than a minute before choosing a side and barracking loudly, and once I've started watching I can't possibly stop for anything mundane (like tidying my room :) ). If it's my team playing then I start barracking loudly from the first bounce.

The regular season has just finished, and in the first week of the finals my team (Sydney) is playing my flatmate's team (Hawthorn), and the loser gets knocked out.

I am *so* not watching the game on Sunday.

Oh, and this allows me to plug my tiny little journal: plug

-- Anonymous, September 06, 2001

Three words: Hockey, hockey, hockey.

Go Stars.

(Obviously, "Go Stars" is not intended to be included in the original "three words", because then that would be FIVE words, yes? But... I'm sure you already knew that. Sigh. I need sleep.)

-- Anonymous, September 06, 2001

I'm with Hannah on this one. I've been looking at the calender for a long while now, waiting for the Varsity Club, $3.00 cans of beers, big, beautiful blue skies and watching the Bucks with 100,000 of my nearest and dearest. Good times.

I get rather crazy about my college football, y'all. My boyfriend is from Michigan. This will not be a problem until November, at which point we may have words. Seriously, can't wait for Saturday when tailgating starts at an ungodly early hour and I lose the better part of my voice. Plus, I'm starting to think Jim Tressel is a wonderful human being.

-- Anonymous, September 06, 2001

My boyfriend is from Michigan. This will not be a problem until November, at which point we may have words.

Boo! Hiss! That's okay, my former roommate went to OU. We had words all the time. But most of the time she couldn't follow. Hee.

I am so excited for Saturday I think I might die. Go Bucks! (Why is it that even if you went to another Ohio school, it's not only perfectly acceptable, but actually expected that you'll be a huge OSU fan?)

-- Anonymous, September 06, 2001

Re: going to another Ohio school yet cheering for the Buckeyes question...I have no clue. Except that this town sucks you in during football season. It's like the best party you've ever been invited to but you can only come if you at least pay lip service. My excuse is that I grew up in Columbus, so it was bred into me at an early age. Woody and Ann Hayes were my backyard neighbors. How could I avoid it?

-- Anonymous, September 06, 2001

(Why is it that even if you went to another Ohio school, it's not only perfectly acceptable, but actually expected that you'll be a huge OSU fan?)

Because all the other Ohio schools have crappy football teams.

-- Anonymous, September 06, 2001

Because all the other Ohio schools have crappy football teams.

And then the sports guy has to step in with his sportsness.

-- Anonymous, September 06, 2001

That's what I'm here for.

Dawn, I live and die with the Washington Capitals (which means I usually die early in the playoffs). That means I now have to swallow my pride and cheer for Jaromir Jagr, after all these years of yelling unprintable things about him every time he came here with the Penguins.

-- Anonymous, September 06, 2001

Because all the other Ohio schools have crappy football teams.

That doesn't fully explain it, though. Emory has a nonexistent sports team, but people still split up their loyalties between the various Southeastern teams. It must be something about OSU in particular.

-- Anonymous, September 06, 2001

I meant football team. Emory has plenty of sports teams. My little brother does not play for any of them. If philosophy were a sport, though . . .

-- Anonymous, September 06, 2001

Emory has a nonexistent sports team, but people still split up their loyalties between the various Southeastern teams. It must be something about OSU in particular.

I don't know. The South is different ... there are so many teams in such a smaller radius to choose from. In Atlanta, for example, you have Georgia and Georgia Tech. South Carolina has the Gamecocks and the Clemson Tigers. Florida has Florida, Miami and FSU. Kentucky has Kentucky and Louisville. Alabama has Alabama and Auburn.

Ohio only has OSU -- if you want to cheer for a "local" state team, that's your only option. I'd guess the same would be true, for example, in the state of Nebraska regarding the Cornhuskers.

-- Anonymous, September 06, 2001

Out of curiousity, do you non-Ohio State alums cheer for the Buckeyes in basketball as well, or are you loyal to the alma mater?

-- Anonymous, September 06, 2001

Columbus is a football town. People still rally for basketball, but they're mostly students, alum or hardcore bball fans. No one else really cares.

Or else that's just me and I'm only in it for the tailgating.

-- Anonymous, September 06, 2001

See, that's legit. Tailgating really is the best part of college football. The crisp fall days, the hibachi with the grilled animal products, the nerf football being chucked around the parking lot, the beer ... it's a wonder I ever make it into the stadium.

-- Anonymous, September 06, 2001

I got an and1 shirt yesterday. I'm wearing it right now, because I love it. If you can tell me whose label that is, you get a cookie.

Nobody wants to talk about the NBA with me, do they? Sad.

-- Anonymous, September 07, 2001

As a former Dayton resident, my opinion is that Ohio is all about the high school and college football. They may enjoy other sports (ah, how I miss the Reds of the 70s, the Reds of my youth, don't get me started on how badly they are dicking over Pete Rose) but they live and die by the pigskin.

My brother switched from trumpet to tuba in high school because his entire goal in life was to dot the I in the Ohio state marching band. Of course, he went to OU, didn't play in the band, drank like a fish and dropped out but he had a dream.

This past weekend we drove from Dayton to Maria Stein and various other wee tiny Ohio towns where people put their babies in cooking pots because they don't have little kiddie pools. You could spot every home with a high school football player by the 3 foot high wooden football helment with their name and number. Usually accompanied by house decrations encouraging their local school to "GO!"

I mean, it's rural Ohio, what the hell else do you do? You've got your corn, your soybeans, your horizon and not much else really. Bowling, going to church and drinking can only take up so much time.

That said, I hate football and really don't care if OSU ever plays again. I don't think I have a sport except maybe figure skating and I've really stopped following that since my one true love Scott Hamilton retired. Plus, I fucking hate that damn ABC color commentator who one golds back in the sixties. The bald guy. Damn, what the fuck is his name? Anyway, I hate him. Hate.

-- Anonymous, September 07, 2001

It's funny that Ohio is all about football and Indiana, right next door, is all about basketball.

And I'm ashamed to confess I've never tailgated. I was a cheerleader, though.

-- Anonymous, September 07, 2001

And I should add that I no longer have a football team to root for: Swat eliminated theirs last December. The grounds were that in order to admit enough football players to make a competitive team, admissions would have to lower its standards for athletes more than the Board of Directors thought allowable. There was a very good New Yorker piece that came out last December, just after the huge controversy, about how the admissions/academics question doesn't apply just to Swarthmore.

Which is another reason why I'm not rooting for any team wholeheartedly yet . . . I feel a little guilty.

-- Anonymous, September 07, 2001

Ohio only has OSU -- if you want to cheer for a "local" state team, that's your only option.

Except for all the traitors in Northwestern Ohio who are all Michigan fans.

-- Anonymous, September 07, 2001

Again, I side with Hannah. I love the Buckeyes, but mainly I love tailgating with thousands of other people who love the Buckeyes. Sad, pathetic, Catherine is a dork story time....for the past two years I've had an in to get football season tickets. Now unless you are an actual student or a big dollar alum contributor, season tickets are like the fountain of youth, you can look and look and never find them. So I spend hundreds of greenbacks on two season tickets. And with the exception of the Miami-OSU game (for sentimental reasons) I left each and every game after the band did Script Ohio at the half to continue drinking at the tailgates. Left seats to drink overpriced Miller Lite. So very sad.

So, no, I am not a true sporty sport sports fan like Mike. I just like the parties.

-- Anonymous, September 07, 2001

If you can tell me whose label that is, you get a cookie.

Stephon Marbury?

-- Anonymous, September 07, 2001

Aw, Berman. You should know better.

It rhymes with Matrell Fleawell.

-- Anonymous, September 07, 2001

Ow. Ow. Buckeyes kill me. So fun. So much beer. Can't feel legs.

-- Anonymous, September 08, 2001

That's all well and good, but Maryland (2-0) is going to Pasedeana to play for the national championship in the Rose Bowl.

-- Anonymous, September 08, 2001

I'm now reading The Game of Life in y'all's honor.

Since I no longer have a college football team, clearly I'll have to adopt someone's.

-- Anonymous, September 10, 2001

WG, I would like to propose my beautiful amazing Texas Longhorns, who are destined to be the national champions this year, after a gorgeous start in kicking the collective asses of New Mexico State (not that that was a challenge) and North Carolina, whom we all suspected was going to give us a run for our money.

I am a professional tailgater, yall. I have more burnt orange jewelry, accessories, and clothing than most of the players' moms. In fact, I have been forced to write a whole entry about my complete and total addiction to Texas football - though you will be spared for a while because I have no way to upload it, hee.

How crazy do I get? Well, I just made Dusty Mangum, our true freshman kicker who just got Big 12 Special Teams Player of the Week AND kicked 49-yard and 51-yard field goals this week...into the wind, be still my beating heart... my new secret boyfriend.

Also, Friday night is all about staying home to rest up for the Saturday festivities, which begin at approximately 4 hours before the actual kickoff.

And, because we are all silly, the newest thing for the girls is buying those little "rhinestone tattoos" and applying them in the shape of the UT logo to shoulders or arms or whatever is most exposed. Only, it leaves a very bizarre tan line, you betcha. It's tacky-sounding, I know, but this is coming from a girl who changes toenail polish twice a week - once on Friday night to burnt orange, and back to pink or red or whatever on Sunday.

We are crazy insane fans.

-- Anonymous, September 10, 2001

PG, I hate to break your heart, but I read this:

WG, I would like to propose my beautiful amazing Texas Longhorns, who are destined to be the national champions this year...

And I'm sad to say that any Mack Brown-coached team is good for one inexplicable, inexcusable loss per year. (Like, say, the one to Stanford last year). Don't get your hopes up.

-- Anonymous, September 10, 2001

And, because we are all silly, the newest thing for the girls is buying those little "rhinestone tattoos" and applying them in the shape of the UT logo to shoulders or arms or whatever is most exposed.

Ain't just a Texas thing. I saw more scarlet and gray glitter on Saturday than ever before. Um, not that I had a block O temp tattoo on my cheek or anything.

-- Anonymous, September 10, 2001

Aw, man, PG, Dusty Magnum's from Mesquite, which means he may have graduated from the same high school as The Smoker, who refers to it as Mesquite Penitentiary. I can't do that to my man.

-- Anonymous, September 10, 2001

Can I resurrect this topic to say HOORAY that the Falcons have a new owner? (And it's not AOL-Time Warner?) Now, the Smith family were not bad owners; they were just owners of a bad team. Every. Friggin'. Year. I hope they use part of that $545m to take a long vacation in Hawaii.

And, yeah, there were other places that needed Arthur Blank's money (it's a little ironic that this deal comes two days after Creative Loafing tries to nominate him as Potential Savior of Atlanta's Arts Scene), but hey, he seems to be stuck in Atlanta and he can't do worse than the Smiths did.

(And his daughter was one of the few consistently nice people in seventh grade. So I'm a little biased.)

Anyway. Falcons. Whoo!

-- Anonymous, December 07, 2001