HOW MANY DOGS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB?

Golden Retriever: The sun is shining, the day is young, we've got our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid burned out bulb?

Border Collie: Just one. And then I'll replace any wiring that's not up to code.

Dachshund: You know I can't reach that stupid lamp!

Rottweiler: Make me.

Lab: Oh, me, me!!! Pleeeeeeze let me change the light bulb! Can I? Can I? Huh? Huh? Huh? Can I?

Malamute: Let the Border Collie do it. You can feed me while he's busy.

Jack Russell Terrier: I'll just pop it in while I'm bouncing off the walls and furniture.

Poodle: I'll just blow in the Border Collie's ear and he'll do it. By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry.

Cocker Spaniel: Why change it? I can still pee on the carpet in the dark.

Doberman Pinscher: While it's dark, I'm going to sleep on the couch.

Mastiff: Mastiffs are NOT afraid of the dark.

Chihuahua: Yo quiero Taco Bulb.

Irish Wolfhound: Can somebody else do it? I've got this hangover...

Pointer: I see it, there it is, there it is, right there...

Greyhound: It isn't moving. Who cares?

Australian Shepherd: First, I'll put all the light bulbs in a little circle...

Basset Hound: It's not edible. I think I'll just....... ZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzz...

Cat: Dogs do not change light bulbs. People change light bulbs. So the question is: how long will it be before I can expect light???

-- Rebekah (daniel1@itss.net), August 29, 2001

Answers

I printed this one and read it to my half Australian Shepard / Chow dog out loud. He just sort of smiled at me, rolled on his back once, and trotted away. My hearing might be playing tricks on me, but I think he was snickering.

-- j.r. guerra (jrguerra@boultinghousesimpson.com), August 30, 2001.

update on yesterday's post.

Well, I was WRONG! My dog, who I THOUGHT had a sense of humor, and was in the backyard when I read it to him, actually went to the carport, where my wife reported, took (actually left) a whiz on my truck tires. Tempermental, them Aussies are. Aw c'mon boy, I was just kidding. . .

-- j.r. guerra (jrguerra@boultinghousesimpson.com), August 31, 2001.