Chinese Torture...

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A young man is wandering, lost, in a forest when he comes upon a small house.

Knocking on the door he is greeted by an ancient Chinese man with a long grey beard.

'I'm lost,' said the man. 'Can you put me up for the night?'

'Certainly,' the Chinese man said, 'but one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter I will inflict upon you the three worst Chinese tortures known to man.'

'OK,' said the man, thinking that the daughter must be pretty old as well, and entered the house.

Over dinner the daughter came down the stairs. She was young, beautiful and had a fantastic body. She was obviously attracted to the young man as she couldn?t keep her eyes off him during the meal.

Remembering the old man?s warning he ignored her and went up to bed alone.

During the night he could bear it no longer and sneaked into her room for a night of passion. He was careful to keep everything quiet so the old man wouldn?t hear and, near dawn, he crept back to his room, exhausted but happy.

When he awoke, he felt a pressure on his chest. Opening his eyes he saw a large rock on his chest with a note on it that read,

'Chinese Torture #1: Large rock on chest.' 'Well, that?s pretty crappy,' he thought. 'If that?s the best the old man can do then I don't have much to worry about.' He picked the boulder up, walked over to the window and threw the boulder out.

As he did so, he noticed another note on it that read, 'Chinese Torture 2: Rock tied to left testicle.' In a panic he glanced down and saw the rope that was already getting close to taut. Figuring that a few broken bones was better than castration he jumped out of the window after the boulder.

As he plummeted towards the ground he saw a large sign on the ground that read, 'Chinese Torture 3: Right testicle tied to bed post.'



-- Anonymous, August 20, 2001

Answers

Not shabby Gavin! Do you think you could post that "Child Abuse" email I sent you, or is it old hat?

Cyberplank with cookies.

-- Anonymous, August 20, 2001


I can't post piccie's mate...you need a website to be able to do that.....Garcie has posted a URL for something very similar on a different thread :)) only they ended up with it being the sheffield teams rather than the Arsenal-Man Utd one you sent me...

-- Anonymous, August 20, 2001

...then we should pass it on to Rik, BUT he seems to be playing the wag these days?

-- Anonymous, August 20, 2001

if you need a web posting i can do it for you

-- Anonymous, August 20, 2001

Wow! I'm sure I heard that one at school. Well it's still funny so it's standing the test of time better than I am. :-)

-- Anonymous, August 20, 2001


...you've lost me there jonno?

-- Anonymous, August 20, 2001

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