The Real World

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Find out what happens. . .

when people start talking 'bout RW.

-- Anonymous, August 16, 2001

Answers

Oh Lord. Don't get me started. Here's my number one point after that last episode: Maybe Malik dates white girls because all the black girls he knows screech at him like banshees????

I used to love Nicole. Obviously she's spent WAY too much time with Quarrel (TM MBTV).

Why is it that Kevin sometimes looks cute as hell and other times looks like Quasimodo?

-- Anonymous, August 16, 2001


My main gripe about The Real World is that it ISN'T THE REAL WORLD!

The only reason eight people in their young 20s ever live together is because they are too poor to live with a lesser amount of people. And they would never sit around talking about deep feelings and racism because they would be off doing a double shift at the watressing/bartending job.

Maybe once a week they would get drunk and talk shit. But that is it.

-- Anonymous, August 16, 2001


It's 7 people but you are entirely correct, it is not the Real World.

But who wants to watch a show that actually shows the Real World? If I want to see people scratching their ass while they watch TV or type on the computer I can stay at home and look at rog.

I think Lori's singing sucks. She reminds me of a bunch of girls I went to church with. They had fine, untrained voices but people told them and told them and told them that they were these amazing talents so they decided they were Singers. They decided they had amazing vocal ranges and could do all these trills and "dig ME I'm a singer!" stuff and they took just fine voices and became these sad versions of the lounge singer women from Saturday Night Live. They sounded like parodies but took themselves so seriously.

That's Lori right there. A few successful nites at Karokee does not make you a Singer girl. Stop fucking around with all that Diva Shit and pretending to be in a band and go take some damn voice lessons and learn to breath and use your voice instead of deciding that loud+changing notes every second+head waving+hand gestures=Greatest Singer EVER.

I'm kind of tired of Real World. I'll take the fun of Cannonball Run or the over-the-top drama of Murder in Small Town X. Everyone knows what happens when you go on Real World now, there's no surprises anymore.

-- Anonymous, August 16, 2001


Well no, it's not the real world, and that's why I can talk miles of unholy shit about those people. Because I don't talk shit about real people in the REAL real world.

*cough*

Y'all aren't going to shame me into not watching it.

Oh Shae, you are SO RIGHT about Lori and that caterwauling she was doing. It cracked me up when Rachel was like, "GOD, STOP!!!" because Lori was truly offended! If she'd take those headphones off she might realize how much she sounds like a goat in labor.

Thank you, Christina Aguilera, for unleashing all your wannabes on the world.

-- Anonymous, August 16, 2001


I know it isn't the real world, I just don't like how they set it up to be that these are the problems shared my most people in this age range.

Now, granted, I'm not in that age range anymore, but I'm not that far removed and it seemed like everyone I knew was worried about things much more mundane. But then again, no one would watch the show if it was mundane.

On a tangent, on of the funniest things I seen recntly was when Debbie (sorry, Deborah) Gibson sang her little Happy Birthday spot on the MTV Almost Legal show, and she did the Christine Aguilera/Britney Spears finger way thing. Then she gave her finger a wierd look and said, "What is up with that? Why do these girls do this finger thing? I hate the finger thing!"

Go Debbie!

-- Anonymous, August 16, 2001



Who knew Debbie could be so funny?!

Back. On. Topic. This RW season seems particularly lame. How many episodes are they going to squeeze out of 1. Quarrel (tm MBTV) screeching at Mike; 2. Lori chasing after Kevin - a.k.a., Bill Clinton, Jr. (again, tm MBTV); 3. Rachel feeling underage and left behind; and Lori's ridiculous caterwauling?

Two questions:

Can Malik be any cuter? And how does Nicole apply her eye shadow? I'm fascinated by it every time she comes on the screen.

-- Anonymous, August 16, 2001


Okay, Nicole is a man, right? We're all agreed on that?

Kevin is a prick. Which must be why I love him.

-- Anonymous, August 16, 2001


"Okay, Nicole is a man, right? We're all agreed on that?"

I love you, Hannah.

-- Anonymous, August 16, 2001


Kristin, I read one of the female Chicago RWers was seen on the street making out with another woman. I know it was you.

-- Anonymous, August 17, 2001

I know you di'int. I know you di'int start a Real World thread without me.

Lori sings the way Maya Rudolph on Saturday Night Live sings when she's making fun of Toni Braxton.

Doesn't Coral remind you of Tami from LA? God, someone please convince her she's fat enough to wire her mouth shut.

And someone needs to introduce Coral to the Lilyette Minimizer. Put a muzzle on those things, girl, before you hurt somebody. You know little Mike gets all mixed up whenever she starts in on him because he's watching her bosoms fight one another for sweater space.

I'm still searching for any reason at all for any of them to be allowed to continue to use up space in our country. So far, all I got is that Malik looked quite fuckable for about half a minute per episode. Right up until he became a big afro wearing pussy in the Nicole vs. Malik episode. So until I celebrate my lesbianism, no more Malik lovin' in my living room.

Wasn't Beth sweet? She almost threw up because a man told her that she sexually excited him? Virginity wasn't cute on Tori Spelling and it's not cute on you either, Beth. Get fucked.

Lord almighty, I love that show.

-- Anonymous, August 20, 2001



How much do Coral and Nicole suck? Good lord. What brats. They only have to work 20 hours a week! Suck. It. Up. I did busy work for 40 hours a week at an UNPAID internship. Stop your bitching. Now.

-- Anonymous, August 30, 2001

I no longer watch the NY10 season because they're boring and stupid, but Kim sure does get her recaps up fast.

-- Anonymous, September 26, 2001

I still watch. I can't stop. I need help.

I almost threw up watching Mike trying to deliver the always sexy line "You are offering me your cherry?" to his friend. That girl did him and the rest of female kind a disfavor by sleeping with him after that scene.

-- Anonymous, September 27, 2001


Ugh. The gelled hair. The Simpsons googly eyes and overbite. The Blue's Clues rugby shirts.

I wish I could at least like Rachel, but they all get on my damn nerves, and yet I watch every week. I still watch Road Rules too.

Dork on!

-- Anonymous, September 27, 2001


Kevin's an asshole.

Does ANYone care about this season?

I really hope the kids in Chicago are exciting.

-- Anonymous, October 31, 2001



Word, Hannah.

Kevin is a huge tool. HUGE.

-- Anonymous, October 31, 2001


I mean like, did you think I'd be flying up here everyday? It's just that you know.

No, I know.

Like, yeah.

-- Anonymous, October 31, 2001


"Did you say she isn't that good looking? Well, Kevin's not that good looking!"

Amen, sistah.

On what planet would any girl be all hot and excited about dating that pasty little poser? And who believes that he's not gay? Best friends? My ass. Why don't you boys hug each other again. Again.

I wonder if it every occured to him that his fledgling MODEL date might be just a tad into having the camera follow her around.

-- Anonymous, October 31, 2001


It's been discussed on the MBTV forum, but DAMN, how can anyone become a model with all that gum showing?

-- Anonymous, October 31, 2001

Why do we still watch this show? It's horrid.

I hope that the Chicago group redeems this crappy show and brings it back to it's former Hawaiian glory.

-- Anonymous, November 06, 2001


I keep watching because I keep hoping Coral will slap someone.

-- Anonymous, November 06, 2001

Wow. Is Jisela a skank or what? So, Blair and Jisela had sex in the confessional? What happened to the bond he has with Rachel?

-- Anonymous, November 14, 2001

Stroke of BnM genius, bringing the whores of RR in to spice up RW.

Didn't Jisela get kicked off? Why haven't we seen the last of her skank ass?

-- Anonymous, November 14, 2001


Jisela is a jis-ore. Wow. I just saw those eps last night.

But I must say, the minute she left it got unbearably boring again.

-- Anonymous, November 28, 2001


What a BORING season and a boring finale.

Have y'all seen these Chicago people?! Holy cow. Clearly they started casting for looks.

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001


Truly the Worst. Season. Evah.

Just how many blonde girls were in the ad for next season? I swear I counted 9.

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001


But how much more interesting does that season look, model-laden or no?

Of course, Bunim-Murray could make a mudwrestling match between George W. and Osama seem dull, but I have hope.

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001


Well it looks good because we have a. hot chicks b. skanky hot chicks c. hot gay guy d. hot skanky gay girl e. angry black man f. angry black PLAYAH man

Back to NY had so much potential too.

-- Anonymous, December 05, 2001


The Chicago season started tonight. Yowza! Where did they find all those pretty people? After boring NY, this looks to be a good season.

Does it make me officially old that I was like, They're all SO young!!

-- Anonymous, January 15, 2002


Y'all know I already did my preseason Real World rant, but I still just have to say, Bunim-Murray - come the fuck on. 3 Barbies and a half black lesbian? Beyond predictable and boring.

I hate them all. I love Real World!

-- Anonymous, January 15, 2002


The Princeton boy was so pretty to look at, it hurt my eyes.

I hope it gets scandalous up in there. And what was the deal with showing the Papa John's pizza boxes in the oven fifteen times? What are they trying to tell us?

-- Anonymous, January 16, 2002


All right, so who's the rock star?

And how cute was Chris' date Kurt? And who would've thougth that Tanya would be homophobic? She certainly didn't say anything about Aneesa. Hmmmm.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2002


I work about a block from this year's house - all of the neighbours around there, all they talk about is how awful it was, having these Blonder than Thou types squealing around the neighbourhood, and how completely unimpressed they were by MTV and the way they came in and tried to bully everyone to do things the MTV way. If they wanted a , which seems very Real Worldish, theyshould have put them in Lincoln Park. But Wicker Park? Don't live there without some indie cred.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2002

Bah!

I forgot it was on. Instead, I watched The Wedding Planner.

Kill me now.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2002


is it just me or did this season start abit soon-ish? doesn't it always start in june for the most part and the other season just ended like last month??

anyhoo, I had it on today, but wasn't paying big attention; saw the rockstar bit though. this season seemed promising last week, but I'm not sure....I'll have to wait till next week to decide if I'm pulled in or not.

-- Anonymous, January 23, 2002


oh yeah semi-OT, but I watched the Wedding Planner sunday night ...heh. I missed an hour of it, but eh. it was abit sappy- ish...hrm

-- Anonymous, January 23, 2002

Word on the MBTV street is that the band was Big Head Todd & The Monsters and that she slipped on Todd's sweat. It's starting to look like Cara doesn't have the world's best taste. Her friend looked like he spent all day dragging off bongs in his mom's basement.

-- Anonymous, January 23, 2002

Poor needs attention Tonya. I do feel sorry for her though.

So does this mean only Keri, Kyle and Chris are life guarding? What will the others do?

-- Anonymous, January 30, 2002


Everyone at work hates Cara. I sort of like her. I think if I had to live with Aneesa I'd hate her 19 year old ass in about 5 minutes.

Do y'all like Cara?

-- Anonymous, February 06, 2002


They're all crazy, all of them. I wish Kyle would stop wearing his Princeton t-shirt because WE GET IT. Cara was not as annoying this week as she's been in the past, and I love Keri. I hope Tonya leaves the show. Theo? Wants to represent the black man? He's a womanizing homophobe. Not exactly MLK material. I've barely paid attention to Aneesa.

-- Anonymous, February 06, 2002

I like Kara but am hating all over the rest of them. Aneesa (sp?) especially. Puhleeze. The boy has been salivating all over you, so to put an end to his lust you jump in the shower to get wet and naked in front of him? Attention whore much?

Kyle seems to forget that the cameras are on him even when he is not talking to them directly. I'll bet his girlfriend/exgirlfriend is throwing up throughout these episodes.

-- Anonymous, February 06, 2002


I'm with the Television Without Pity (nee Mighty Big TV) folks in referring to Cara as Cara Jessica Parker. I'd hate living with her but from afar I just feel sorry for her because girl needs to find some self-worth fast. And a sammich.

I like Keri but she needs to stop playing passive aggressive with Kyle and tell him straight up to stop dicking around with her emotions.

I think I have a crush on Aneesa despite the obvious attention whoriness. She's a hottie.

Tonya, Tonya, Tonya. First it was a kidney infection. Which can be life-threatening. Now it's kidney stones. Which are much more common in "people her age" than she indicates and although painful not life threatening. My brother used to get them all the time, like every month at her age. My mother still gets them about twice a year. I wonder if she drinks a lot of milk, they told Jay that excess calcium can cause them. And they really don't treat, just let you be in pain until they pass, unless they are huge, massive huge. The only treatment they gave my mother when they got too big to pass was to put her in an water tank and bombard her with ultrasonic waves to break them into smaller pieces. If Tonya is able to swim and carry luggage and throw dramatic fits on the street she can't be that bad. Man I want to smack her.

-- Anonymous, February 07, 2002


Tonya cracks me up - what was that bit at the pool where she was saying it wasn't worth it, puking blood, etc. If you have to be a hypochondriac, be a smart one - your stomach and esophogus are not magically attached to your kidneys, enabling you to 'puke blood' when they are infected. But, whatever. And everyone knows doctors in Walla Walla are much better than medical professionals in Chicago, right?

Mostly they all annoy me, except Cara. I like her a lot - she seems the most 'familiar' person I have ever seen on this show.

-- Anonymous, February 07, 2002


So now, with Aneesa, Veronica, and her 30-year-old ex/current/whatever girlfriend, it gets interesting. Neck shaking! Talon waving! DRAMA!

-- Anonymous, March 06, 2002

Oh, please tell me y'all watched tonight.

Poor Cara. Poor Cara and her "I've never done this" routine. That guy could NOT care less. He called her so that Kyle would set him up with some more chicks.

-- Anonymous, March 12, 2002


H, you know I saw it and flippin' DIED when I heard the vocal stylings of Woo Woo.

-- Anonymous, March 12, 2002

As soon as we heard "Zee dah boo dee, dah boo dee" my husband and I were clutching our ears and rolling on the floor groaning. Why, Lord? Why?!?! BMP are cruel, cruel people.

Were they trying to comment on the cheesiness of the situation? The faux romance? Or could they just not resist the opportunity to celebrate Woo Woo's flow one more time?

Cara is sad. Such a smart, pretty, sensitive girl, and she passes out the ass with no respect for herself. The only reason that oddly named guy called her was because Kyle MADE him, and she just clung to that small gesture like it made their one night stand meaningful.

-- Anonymous, March 13, 2002


Cara is one of those people who are so insightful about themselves, but you know they just say it so other people will think she's all smart and deep, but really she just latched onto a few key phrases and ran with them.

-- Anonymous, March 13, 2002

If I had an iron skillet and Cara in the same room she'd be in pain.

God. She was so clingy and instant-relationshipy to the spelling- challenged George. Oh, sorry, Djordge. I've never done this before my ass.

Also, do these people not know there are cameras in their bedrooms? Do they not understand how to cover the lens so they can have unfilmed booty?

Aneesa's mom has serious issues.

-- Anonymous, March 13, 2002


And it looks like Aneesa inherited half of them. I can see where her mom is coming from, in some ways. Aneesa tells her she doesn't want to hear crap about her choices (and she shouldn't have to), but then she picks up the phone and talks about all this mayhem she creates in her life, expecting to be comforted by Mommy. On the other hand, her mom so obviously disconnects emotionally when Aneesa does something that disappoints her, and thinks nagging and guilting are appropriate mothering techniques. It seems like that transition in their relationship, from mother and child to mother and ADULT child, has been long and difficult and messy.

-- Anonymous, March 13, 2002

Is it just me or has Tonya grown on you? I sort of like her now. Mostly because she called Aneesa out on her need to be naked ALL the time. I don't care how "free" you are, there's no need to go to the bathroom with the door open and a camera filming the entire thing.

Also - how is it possible for Cara to be so self-aware and so fucked up at the same time?

-- Anonymous, April 17, 2002


Oh man...the whole naked ALL THE TIME thing was gettin on my last nerve. Who the hell walks around in front of roommates in a tank top and no underpants?

-- Anonymous, April 17, 2002

And heels!!! A short sleeved tshirt and heels!

Isn't that like being naked and wearing black socks? Doesn't everyone know that flatters no one?

-- Anonymous, April 17, 2002


I used to not care one way or the another about Aneesa but after this episode I loathe her. What a snotty brat.

And poor Cara. There's just nothing to feel for that girl but pity.

-- Anonymous, April 23, 2002


Well, it's official: After seeing the pee fishing on Real World and the puking Lola on The Osbournes, I'm grossed out beyond belief. I'm tired of seeing bodily expulsions.

I'd rather have to listen to House of Pain's "Jump Around" song with the screechy siren noise for the rest of my life than to ever see blood, poo, pee, snot, sputum, vomit, colostomy bags, severe gingivitis, semen, smegma, vaginal yeast, placenta, or leprosy cross my digital cable channels again.

-- Anonymous, April 24, 2002


Jack and Lola cavorting in the pool to the smooth sounds of Sade was an absolute classic. With all that build-up, to have Lola puke up pool water at the end, made me laugh until my sides burst.

-- Anonymous, April 24, 2002

Slap me with a wet noodle (thank you Abigail VanBuren) - I probably should have posted my Jack/Lola love comment on the Osbournes thread. Sorry.

-- Anonymous, April 24, 2002

thank God. i knew i hadn't seen the Real World in a few episodes...

-- Anonymous, April 24, 2002

Did everyone watch A Very Special Episode of The Real World?

-- Anonymous, May 07, 2002

I did. It was weird. Not very special at all. And poor Keri, getting the shaft over and over. I wish Tonya and Aneesa would fall through a street grate together and get eaten by whatever it is that lives in the sewers of Chicago. My eyes rolled out of my head and under the sofa when Chris made them do the serenity prayer, and I laughed at Cara, who was peeking at everyone else during the prayer.

-- Anonymous, May 07, 2002

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