Tuesday August 7 6:42 PM ET

Forget the Kilts, Penis Puppeteers Go Down Under

By Paul Majendie

EDINBURGH (Reuters) - For an Australian comedian, it is the dream assignment -- show off your manhood, travel the world and get paid for it.

And Steve Harrison and Daniel Lewry are doing just that as the decidedly ``Down Under'' stars of ``Puppetry of the Penis,'' an eye-popping show that celebrates the ancient Australian art of genital origami.

There is no need to peep under their kilts at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival. The irrepressible duo bare all on stage, twisting, turning and tweaking their penises into every imaginable shape from the Loch Ness Monster to the Eiffel Tower.

For the women fans who shriek with uncontrollable laughter at every new contortion, there is no need to bring any binoculars along -- the living genital sculptures are projected on a giant video screen that leaves nothing to the imagination.

Audience participation is actively encouraged -- the crowd is urged to persuade the timid mollusc to come out of his shell.

The Olympic Torch was certainly never carried like this at the 2000 Games in Sydney.

The pair show intense testicular fortitude to pull off the windsurfer. ``Don't try this at home,'' they beg crowds helpless with laughter.

And Lewry loves every minute of it: ``We play with ourselves for a living, get paid for it and see the world,'' he said, chortling over his good fortune.

But is there ever any danger that they might rise to the occasion in mid-performance?

``You certainly have to watch your reading material before going on stage. But once you get in front of 400 people and they are all staring...,'' said Harrison.

``I believe porn stars have difficulty performing in front of just a camera crew,'' said Lewry.

``Puppetry of the Penis'' is the brainchild of Australian comedians Simon Morley and David Friend, who first performed the show at the Melbourne Comedy Festival to universal acclaim -- and astonishment.

It has now been seen by more than 250,000 people around the globe. Next stop on the show's world tour for the originators is Toronto, Canada.

Harrison and Lewry had one of the most alarming and offbeat auditions in the history of theater -- exposing themselves in front of a panel of judges and contorting their penises into weird and wonderful shapes. After that, a hall full of screaming women was nothing.

One of the great charms of the show is its total lack of smut -- they come across as a pair of cheeky little boys who have just discovered what is happening between their legs.

And ``Puppetry of the Penis'' attracts more raucous ladies than it does admiring homosexuals.

Harrison thinks he knows why: ``To gays the penis is an icon. We are just mocking it.''

-- Anonymous, August 10, 2001

Answers

I already had a link in my files, but I was trying to behave myself, she said demurely.

-- Anonymous, August 10, 2001

The interest in the human male penis is no small thing.

-- Anonymous, August 10, 2001

Firemouse demure? BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

-- Anonymous, August 10, 2001

I didn't know you could twist it...?

-- Anonymous, August 11, 2001

Well Helen, yes, you can... tenderly, and if in the apropriate state...

cheez, I was going to post this months ago, and figured it was pushing it even for me, an obvious perv... and Firemouse controlled herself, and she's worse than I am...

What gives?

-- Anonymous, August 11, 2001

I'd rather not admit seeing the show already...

-- Anonymous, August 11, 2001

Well (harrumph), just 'cause I post it don't mean I read it.

-- Anonymous, August 11, 2001

So you watched the video?

-- Anonymous, August 12, 2001

Who's reading? I'm just looking at the artwork.

-- Anonymous, August 12, 2001

Was there something to read?

-- Anonymous, August 12, 2001

"You forget that you're looking at two men naked on a stage. It's art." Puppetry of the Penis patron, Sydney

See? It's art.

-- Anonymous, August 12, 2001