Today's Joke:

When you get those pre-approved letters in the mail for everything from credit cards to 2nd mortgages and junk like that, most of them come with postage paid return envelopes, right? Well, why not get rid of some of your other junk mail and put it in these cool little envelopes!

Send an ad for your local chimney cleaner to American Express. Or a pizza coupon to Citibank. If you didn't get anything else that day, then just send them their application back! Just make sure your name isn't on anything you send them! Heck, you can send it back empty if you want to just to keep 'em guessing!

Let's turn this into a chain letter! Eventually, the banks and credit card companies will begin getting all their crap back in the mail. Let's let them know what it's like to get junk mail, and best of all... THEY'RE paying for it! Twice! Let's help keep our postal service busy since they say e-mail is cutting into their business, and that's why they need to increase postage again!

-- Anonymous, August 08, 2001

Answers

ALL STRATEGIC AIR COMMAND bases receive an annual going-over by the SAC inspector general. Everyone puts out a tremendous effort so that their base might earn the coveted rating of "Excellent." One year when we achieved that distinction, a newly arrived airman was told to put the news on the base marquee. She posted this message: BEST IN THE SAC -- AND THAT'S A FACT. -- Contributed to Reader's Digest "Humor In Uniform" by C. J. Caligiuri, Jr.

-- Anonymous, August 08, 2001

SAR, it would be tempting to make use of the return envelopes, except that I'm trying to train the telemarketers to send me stuff by mail instead so all I have to do is throw out their trash at my convenience. I'd hate to think the consequence of abusing the postal system would be more phone calls!

-- Anonymous, August 08, 2001

We have taken to turning off the ringers!...no more telemarketers at dinner or other "private" times!

-- Anonymous, August 08, 2001

People are doing exactly that. It's hilarious.

-- Anonymous, August 08, 2001