Well teams, at this point in the show we normally have a musical round and that's obviously a difficulty on the BBS. But we do have a first rate pianist (I think that's what I heard) in Screacher so we ought to go ahead. Especially as Galaxy has been researching diligently for this feature and has taken a keen interest in rummaging amongst our old 7-inchers all week to come up with the appropriate music. So this next round, teams, involves singing one song to the tune of another and it's called "One song to the tune of another". Perhaps some clarification is needed here. What we do is take essentially TWO songs (the one and the other mentioned earlier), let's call them Song 1 or "S1" for simplicity, (!!!?) and for want of a better term song 2 or "s2". Now a song for our purposes here comprises two building blocks or elements if you will, namely the words, let's designate them as "w" and the tune, let's designate that as "t".

So we have the "one song", "s1" comprising of words which we can refer to as "wS1" and a tune which we shall refer to as "ts1". Ah - I see a glimmer of understanding dawning in your eyes. That's right - we also have "the other" song, "s2" remember? which comprises of - that's right "ws2" and "ts2". Now what we do is DISCARD "ts1" and "ws2" (which simplifies matters a lot - I think it would make a lot more sense to discard the other 2 bits as well quite frankly) and add the remainder ws1+ts2 to create the unholy mess you're about to hear. Anyway for those of you at home who didn't quite grasp that it's repeated on our factsheet obtainable from BBS HQ and also on ceefax.

Right teams can you please sing the following :-

"Hit Me with your Rythm stick" to the tune of "Oh Sole mio"
"Blaydon Races" to the tune of "The Lambtom Worm" (I suspect we might get lynched by the entire population of the NE for this one)
"Who let the dogs out" to the tune of "Girl from Ipanema"
"Frank Clark knows my Father" to the tune of "The Dam Busters"

All you need to do is send us a wav file or an mp3 thingy whatever. Anyone sad enough to attempt this and nerdy enough to succeed will be referred to Madge at our Agony Aunt's section and she will be able to notify the relevant authorities and have you locked up out of harm's way put you in touch with caring organisations which can help you get a life.

(I hope you're playing this at home)

:-)

-- Anonymous, July 19, 2001

Answers

Humph, I attempted to comply with your lucid instructions. However, when I tried my entry with Gallaxy, they bounced. But in the best spirit (well, beer actually) of this competition, I'd like to display my exhibit. However as the rules of this BBS don't allow that, you'll have to make do with this:

One Sunday morn young Lambton
('Twas on the 9th o' June)
Catched a fish upon his huek
On a Summer's Afternoon
But whatt'n a kind a fish it was
(It sure wez heavy laden)
He couldn't be boshed for to carry it hyem
Aal the way back ti Blaydon.

If you don't know the tune, you'll just have to hum - and judging by a recent posting, that shouldn't be too difficult for you ;-)

-- Anonymous, July 19, 2001

An excellent attempt there Screacher and I'll save that for when we play "Half the words of one song alternating with half the words of the other" - I don't think we've played that one before. Oh dear - I was worried that this one would cause some confusion. Now if I can try and simplify this a little further.......

-- Anonymous, July 20, 2001