[Humor] Don't Flip a Woman Off

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I was riding to work yesterday when I observed a female driver cut right in front of a pickup truck causing him to have to drive on to the shoulder to avoid hitting her. This evidently angered the driver enough that he hung his arm out his window and flipped the woman off. "Man, that guy is stupid" I thought to myself. I ALWAYS smile nicely and wave in a sheepish manner whenever a female does anything to me in traffic and here's why:

I drive 48 miles each way every day to work,that's 96 miles each day.

Of these, 16 miles each way is bumper-to-bumper. Most of the bumper-to-bumper is on an 8 lane highway so if you just look at the 7 lanes I am not in,that means I pass something like a new car every 40 feet per lane.

That's 7 cars every 40 feet for 32 miles. That works out to be 982 cars every mile, or 31,424 cars.

Even though the rest of the 32 miles is not bumper to bumper, I figure I pass at least another 4000 cars. That brings the number to something like 36,000 cars I pass every day. Statistically, half of these are driven by females, that's 18,000. In any given group of females 1 in 28 has PMS. That's 642.

According to Cosmopolitan, 70% describe their love life as dissatisfying or unrewarding. That's 449.

According to the National Institute of Health, 22% of all females have seriously considered suicide or homicide. That's 98.

And 34% describe men as their biggest problem. That's 33.

According to the National Rifle Association 5% of all females carry weapons and this number is increasing.

That means that EVERY SINGLE DAY, I drive past at least one female that has a lousy love life, thinks men are her biggest problem, has seriously considered suicide or homicide, has PMS, and is armed.

Flip one off?....... I think not.

-- Anonymous, July 19, 2001

Answers

The "I" in this post isn't me, of course.

-- Anonymous, July 19, 2001

ROTF!!!!! but Dan DOES drive 62 miles one way, and nothing...NOTHING gets his goat more than a woman driving and putting on makeup!

-- Anonymous, July 19, 2001

Meemur, good story, and I love the statistics, being the left-brain sort of person that I am. This story shows why it might be a bad idea to give into your immediate anger. The overall suggestion that getting angry over traffic problems can be self defeating is a good one. In fact anger itself is rarely a good way to react to things. A friend of mine used to say, "You get angry, you lose."

-- Anonymous, July 19, 2001



-- Anonymous, July 19, 2001

LOL, Barefoot!

-- Anonymous, July 19, 2001


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