A private world

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Ras, whats left to be private in your world - I am just stunned, amazed at the energy, joy, heartache and laughter that pours from your journal - but you must have a private world, a world you can reserve for yourself?

tena na koe Karl

-- Anonymous, June 13, 2001


My Goddess, I don't know. :) When I sit down and write my entries, I usually know if I'm going to be sharing my heart and soul or if I'm going to play it safe and share what I wouldn't mind my audience knowing. It's impossible for me to share every aspect of my life with readers because there are way too many feelings and thoughts and situations in each day so I pick the most outstanding ones--the ones I think will help people understand me better or ones that I know will affect my life in the future--and share those. I write about the things that will have a lasting impact on my life and the way I will write.

A lot is still very private to me--the little moments, the daily routines, the things I do that make me so happy, but don't mean much in the big picture...all those are kept to myself mostly. My family life is kept kind of quiet because it's too difficult to write about and not something I'm particularly proud of. I keep a lot of my past to myself. I keep my feelings for people to myself. I'm not sure where the line is drawn between what's mine and mine alone and what is shared because I never really know until I write. Sometimes I feel I've shared too much and sometimes I feel like I haven't shared enough. I know this doesn't answer your question, but I guess right now, both of my worlds are melting into each other and I'm very unsure about what I'm doing here--sharing my life with so many people who shouldn't know any of this in the first place.

-- Anonymous, June 13, 2001

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