This afternoon Bobby Robsons plans for next season were further thrown into disarray when it emerged that Defender Marcelino had become the latest player to fall foul of the Toon injury curse. The tall defender scratched his hair when getting out of bed. It isn't known how exactly this happened but an insider has said it was probably a new brand of pillowcase that had caused the accident. The source said "getting out of bed can be difficult for footballers and we think he must have lifted his head quicker than normal" the mole went on "hair is one of Marcelinos strong points and this new injury must cast doubt on his participation in the 2004/5 season" Bobby Robson is said to have checked out wellas new range of conditioners in a bid to get him fit...

-- Anonymous, May 29, 2001

Answers

You couldn't even make decent glue with him.

-- Anonymous, May 29, 2001

Not Loreal? Is he not worth it?

-- Anonymous, May 29, 2001

Well that had me curled up laughing. I think we might as well wave him goodbye. It must have shaved a lot off his value. After he's had the brush-off we'll have to comb the country in search of a replacement. YBR must be bristling mad.

Hair today and gone tomorrow (as Dr Bill might say in a different context).

-- Anonymous, May 29, 2001

Obviously not a permiership player.

-- Anonymous, May 29, 2001

Time we cut him from the squad.

Howay Jonno divvnt use all the puns!

-- Anonymous, May 29, 2001

Mohican f**k off back to Spain if you ask me.

-- Anonymous, May 30, 2001

I bet Ginola will soon give an interview where he encourages Marcelino to battle with this massive hardship that has struck him.

-- Anonymous, May 30, 2001

Feeling very distressed, no doubt.

-- Anonymous, May 30, 2001

don't understand all of this negativity, folks.

he's head and shoulders above the rest....

hat, coat, door...

-- Anonymous, May 30, 2001

And I hope somebody locks it behind you Min :-))

-- Anonymous, May 30, 2001

Well this thread has been a beehive of activity. Should we let it dye?

-- Anonymous, May 30, 2001

It's been a career completely lacking in highlights and it's clear that a parting of the ways is called for. The only remaining question is whether to pay or not to pay his wages.

-- Anonymous, May 30, 2001

Sorry crew, I've joined this conversation rather late. Can somebody please cut me in to the debate and tell me if wigganna sign some big wig? I liked that Vinnie Jones of Locks, tock and barrel fame. At his age, he'd be a snip.

-- Anonymous, May 30, 2001