Most of us have read the scare mail about the person whose kidneys were stolen while he passed out. While that was an "urban legend"; this is not! It's happening every day. I'm sending this WARNING ONLY TO A FEW OF MY CLOSEST FRIENDS!

You too may have been a VICTIM so read on.....

My thighs were stolen from me during the night a few years ago. It was just that quick! I went to sleep in my body and woke up with someone else's thighs. The new ones had the texture of oatmeal. Who would have done such a cruel thing to legs that had been wholly, if imperfectly, mine for years? Whose thighs were these? What happened to mine? I spent the entire summer looking for them. I searched, in vain, at pools and beaches, anywhere I might find female limbs exposed. I became obsessed. I had nightmares filled with cellulite and flesh that turns to bumps in the night.

Finally, hurt and angry, I resigned myself to living out my life in jeans and Sheer Energy pantyhose. Then, just when my guard was down, the thieves struck again. My rear end was next to disappear. I knew it was the same gang, because they took pains to match my new rear end(although badly attached at least three inches lower than the original) to the thighs they had stuck me with earlier. Now my rear end complimented my legs, lump for lump. Frantic, I prayed that long skirts would stay in fashion.

Two years ago I realized my arms had been switched. One morning while fixing my hair, I watched, horrified but fascinated, as the flesh of my upper arms swung to and fro with the motion of the hairbrush. This was really getting scary. My body was being replaced, cleverly and fiendishly, one section at a time. In the end, in deepening despair, I gave up my T-shirts. What could they do to me next?

Age? Age had nothing to do with it. Age was supposed to creep up, unnoticed and intangible, something like maturity. NO, I was being attacked, repeatedly and without warning. That's why I've decided to share my story. I can't take on the medical profession by myself. WOMEN OF AMERICA, wake up and smell the coffee! That isn't really 'PLASTIC' those surgeons are using. You know where their getting those replacement parts, don't you? The next time you suspect someone has had a 'face lift', look again! Look familiar? Are those your eyelids on that movie star? I think I finally have found my thighs....and I hope Cindy Crawford paid a really good price for them!

This is not a hoax! This is happening to women in every town every night! WARN YOUR FRIENDS.....CONSIDER YOURSELF WARNED!!!!

-- Anonymous, April 05, 2001