A man (looked in his 30s or 40s) sitting on the side railing looking rather forlorn. Attached to a stake in the ground just in front of him was a sign which said "Old and Paranoid. Please help"

NOt sure what he was trying to achieve, but it certainly got me laughing after a long day at work.

-- Anonymous, March 19, 2001

Answers

OK - so which of you was it? Not me, your honour. I have a watertight alibi. My guess is De Builder. Of course, I could be wrong..............

-- Anonymous, March 19, 2001

Cue a favourite joke of mine -

Everybody says I'm paranoid.

(That joke is all my own work - sadly only about 5% of the people I've ever told it to understand it. Or perhaps they're just getting at me.)

-- Anonymous, March 20, 2001

There is a great sign near my folks' place.

"To the thieving bastard who stole my lawn mower. Please either take this grass box away or bring my mower back. It's no bloody use to me on its own." Sure enough the grassbox was hanging from a nail at the bottom of the sign. Been there about 5 years at least now.

I can relate to getting angry enough to go to all that trouble.

-- Anonymous, March 20, 2001