I got to Kingston Park later than usual and was directed to the main car park. Recognised a smart silver BMW and so wasn't surprised to see Steve Harper in goal. The complete team was:

1. Steve Harper
2. Ryan McGuffie
3. Olivier Bernard
4. Gary Caldwell
5. David Beharall
6. Jamie McClen
7. Diego Gavilan
8. Mark Boyd ("Skippy")
9. Lomana LuaLua
10. Bablo Bonvin
11. Stephen Glass

Everton had a few well known names - including Thomas Myhre, David Unsworth and Alessandro Pistone, who looked just as happy to be here as he used to in a black and white shirt!

We started off stronger but the game evened out. Neither keeper really had a save to make. A tackle by Pistone on Gavilan led to a free kick which Glass curled nicely into the box and Lua2 netted after a bit of a scramble.

At half-time I headed to the upstairs bar, nearly bumping into Warren Barton on the way in! I was followed out of the loo by Daniel Cordone, and then spotted Clarky and Screacher who had somehow managed to get seats in the stand near Bobby Robson.

Back out for the second half. Harper had been limping a bit at the end of the first half so it was worrying to see Gary Caldwell taking his goal kicks - hope it isn't serious. He was in fine voice tho' - organising the players and yelling at them to keep the ball. Everton put us under a bit of pressure but we hung on. When 2 minutes stoppage time was announced Harper was screaming at the players to take the ball to the corner and keep it there! A win and a clean sheet - not before time!

-- Anonymous, March 05, 2001

Answers

Just brass neck, Steph!

Dreary game played on a hard pitch, in a gusty wind and a temperature of about -40 deg C. Little evidence of skill from either side, mostly big humps up the middle. Seemingly, almost every attempt to get the ball down and play it resulted in a misplaced pass.

Our future stars looked distinctly limited, with only Gary Caldwell and Stephen Glass showing any occasional glimpses of any class - in addition to Steve Harper, who looked to be carrying a knee injury. In the "not too bad" column were David Beharall, and Olivier Bernard and Mark Boyd. The rest were instantly forgettable, and IMO looked entirely dispensable.

Pist-one was making his first appearance after a long absence with a knee injury - and did nowt.

STAR WATCH: BR was their with his full entourage, who all looked suitably bored by the proceedings, although Bobby himself seemed in good spirits. Everton were well represented by Walter Smith, Archie Knox, and Head Coach, Dave Watson. Joe Jordon was spotted in the bar at HT talking to Walter Smith - don't know who he's with these days.
Good to see Warren Barton and Steve Caldwell showing up to support the stiffs, and also Daniel Cordone who stood all on his own in the bar at HT watching the mackems on the telly - perhaps he trying to pick up the strange accent (you heard it hear first).

-- Anonymous, March 05, 2001

See you must have warmed up a bit Clarky - not too many topys.

Agree re-comments by Steph and Mr C. Harps was carrying his injury (behind the knee??) in the first half. Didn't recognise a goalie on the bench (Coppy, McMen, Kendrick, Orr and Cowan) so that's probably why he stayed on - together with no game at the w/e. Actually, I think that steward below us was itching for a game between the sticks!

Couldn't understand what Cordone was doing there in the bar. Complete loner just leaning against the wall watching telly, then buggered off (I presume) to watch the 2nd half.

Poor performance by two poor teams. Gary C was head and shoulders (litterally) above the rest. Luax2 should try playing football. If he continues the way he is right now, he'll end up in the circus juggling his balls. But not playing top class footie.

-- Anonymous, March 05, 2001

Thanks for the reports folks! Sounds like Cordone might have had the right idea. Stay inside where it was warm and do his homework for an upcoming match. Or put strange Argentinian curses on certain players.(Quinn off and Hutch supposedly limping at one point) ;-))

-- Anonymous, March 05, 2001

Thank you for the report. Always like to hear how freezing it is at Kingston Park - reminds me so much of home!

But it doesn't sound as though today's ruling on transfers, with the idea of protecting "little clubs" for the money they spend on training young players has much relevance for this lot.

-- Anonymous, March 06, 2001

I think that the reason Bobby was smiling is that he can't actually see as far as the pitch.

-- Anonymous, March 06, 2001

Fecking cold for sure, I agree with most of the stuff already said here are some plus points:
1) Caldwell is going to be a goodun.
2) We played quite slick passing footy for about 15 - 20 mins in the first half.
3) Everton were kept at arms length.
4) Bernard, Bonvin, Glass all lefties therefore a team with shape.
5) Several players with good technique.
6) Pissy no longer plays for us.
7) The team were more confident than I expected.

Overall I thought two poor teams were on the (bliddy not good enough) pitch. And our stiffs are shortarses.

-- Anonymous, March 06, 2001

Cordone was sat with Warren Barton when I went out for the 2nd half.

-- Anonymous, March 06, 2001

Why wasn't Cordone playing? Was he injured? If not then I see no way why he shouldn't be busting a gut to secure his future here. Things don't look too long term for Cordone!

-- Anonymous, March 06, 2001

He looked very p*ssed off. A few people asked him for autographs in the bar but he never smiled. Still hasn't bothered to learn any English, I can't see him staying. He looked good his first few games but that was it.

-- Anonymous, March 06, 2001

Umm Steph... >"I was followed out of the loo by Daniel Cordone"
... now what exactly was he doing in there in the first place!

-- Anonymous, March 06, 2001

Hey who says it was Cordone in the wrong toilet?!

-- Anonymous, March 06, 2001

Good point De B! Steph?

-- Anonymous, March 06, 2001

Actually, he in the toilet avec moi - the Gents that is.
I've actually pee-ed next to Danny Cordone, and what's more his secret is safe with me!

-- Anonymous, March 06, 2001

OK I think it's becoming clearer. Clarky and Daniel were in the loo together doing ... whatever while Steph was standing guard outside.
Let me know if I'm getting this wrong.

-- Anonymous, March 06, 2001

Sounds about right to me, Geordie. Hmmmmmmmmmm.

-- Anonymous, March 06, 2001