BBS Corinthian League Match 2

Now I remember why I hate the Random Number Generator so much! March 4 1996, Man Utd at SJP, we lost 1-0 after some Frenchman scuffed the ball in off his shin in a goal mouth scramble after Schmeichel had somehow kept all of our 20+ shots in the first half out. A crushing blow from which we never really recovered.

Points Srnicek 1 Barton 2 Beresford 2 Howey 2 Albert 2 Ginola 1 (booked) Lee 1 (booked) Batty 2 Beardsley 2 Asprilla 2 Ferdinand 2

BBS Corinthian League Results Match 2

Home Team	Result	Away Team
Proper Lard Unathletic	3 - 1	Baxter Basics
Real Zaragossy	3 - 2	Lutwyche Wanderers FC
Rik's Rovers	2 - 1	Buttox Kickers
Shilbottle WMC	2 - 0	Collingwood's Monuments
Spayne	5 - 0	Crazy Canucks
Steph's Superstars	0 - 3	Daily Toon Part Timers
The Gallowgate	3 - 1	Douglas Boys
Useless United	2 - 0	FC Jumpers for Goalposts
Willington Quay Old Girls Eleven	4 - 4	Gav's Knackers
Kiwi's Kloons	1 - 1	Grassy @rsed Moochers

A big vote of thanks there to Garcie whose Spayne have come up with a neat scoreline to remind everyone what we went onto do to that some opponent 6 months later :-) Unless your name is Pete of course...

BBS Emergency Corinthian League Table

Team Info			Home					Away					Overall
Position	Team	Played	Won	Dwn	Lst	G/F	G/A	Won	Dwn	Lst	G/F	G/A	Won	Dwn	Lst	G/F	G/A	G/Dif	Points
1	Daily Toon Part Timers	2	1	0	0	2	0	1	0	0	3	0	2	0	0	4	0	4	6
2	Proper Lard Unathletic	2	1	0	0	3	1	1	0	0	3	2	2	0	0	6	2	4	6
3	Willington Quay Old Girls Eleven	2	0	1	0	4	4	1	0	0	3	0	1	1	0	6	4	3	4
4	Useless United	2	1	0	0	2	0	0	1	0	0	0	1	1	0	2	0	2	4
5	Gav's Knackers	2	1	0	0	1	0	0	1	0	4	4	1	1	0	4	4	1	4
6	Spayne	2	1	0	0	5	0	0	0	1	0	1	1	0	1	5	1	4	3
7	Collingwood's Monuments	2	1	0	0	4	0	0	0	1	0	2	1	0	1	4	2	3	3
8	Steph's Superstars	2	0	0	1	0	3	1	0	0	5	0	1	0	1	5	3	2	3
9	The Gallowgate	2	1	0	0	3	1	0	0	1	0	1	1	0	1	3	1	2	3
10	Lutwyche Wanderers FC	2	0	0	0	0	0	1	0	1	4	3	1	0	1	4	3	1	3
11	Shilbottle WMC	2	1	0	0	2	0	0	0	1	0	2	1	0	1	2	2	0	3
12	Rik's Rovers	2	1	0	0	2	1	0	0	1	0	2	1	0	1	2	3	-1	3
13	Douglas Boys	2	1	0	0	1	0	0	0	1	1	3	1	0	1	1	3	-2	3
14	Kiwi's Kloons	2	1	0	1	1	3	0	0	0	0	0	1	0	1	1	3	-2	3
15	Real Zaragossy	2	1	0	0	3	2	0	0	1	0	4	1	0	1	3	6	-3	3
16	Crazy Canucks	2	1	0	0	2	0	0	0	1	0	5	1	0	1	2	5	-3	3
17	Grassy @rsed Moochers	2	0	1	0	0	0	0	0	1	1	1	0	1	1	1	1	-1	1
18	Buttox Kickers	2	0	0	1	2	3	0	0	1	1	2	0	0	2	3	4	-2	0
19	Baxter Basics	2	0	0	1	1	2	0	0	1	1	3	0	0	2	1	5	-4	0
20	FC Jumpers for Goalposts	2	0	0	1	0	5	0	0	1	0	2	0	0	2	0	6	-6	0

BBS Corinthian League Next Fixtures

Home Team	Result	Away Team
Baxter Basics	vs	Real Zaragossy
Proper Lard Unathletic	vs	Rik's Rovers
Lutwyche Wanderers FC	vs	Shilbottle WMC
Buttox Kickers	vs	Spayne
Collingwood's Monuments	vs	Steph's Superstars
Crazy Canucks	vs	The Gallowgate
Daily Toon Part Timers	vs	Useless United
Douglas Boys	vs	Willington Quay Old Girls Eleven
FC Jumpers for Goalposts	vs	Kiwi's Kloons
Gav's Knackers	vs	Grassy @rsed Moochers

-- Anonymous, March 05, 2001

Answers

Five - Nowt, I say Five - Nowt. Well you see, we've had a lot of injuries, and the ref, well the ref is an idiot, and then the field was a cabbage patch, and they should have added more time, and well, well, I suppose we didn't really deserve a point cos they scored FIVE and we got NOWT. Double trainig session coming up, aye La Manga sounds good.

-- Anonymous, March 05, 2001

Should of been six like

-- Anonymous, March 05, 2001

We are top of the league sing we are top of the league......We are top of the league sing we are top of the league......We are top of the league sing we are top of the league......We are top of the league sing we are top of the league......We are top of the league sing we are top of the league......We are top of the league sing we are top of the league......We are top of the league sing we are top of the league......We are top of the league sing we are top of the league......We are top of the league sing we are top of the league......

-- Anonymous, March 05, 2001

Useless go storming up the table. Not at all in character. Seeing as our next match will be against the table toppers, we'll have to work extra hard at remembering just how Useless we're supposed to be. It's what our fans expect. The squad have been ordered to spend the night in Bigg Market. Those turning up at training not suitably hungover will be immediately placed on the transfer list!

-- Anonymous, March 05, 2001

Goodness me. Mid-table mediocraty already. And Steph's Sperstars next week coming of a thrashing ... watch out red zone here we come.

-- Anonymous, March 05, 2001

Ahem! the Name of my team is Lutwyche Wanderers CFC & not ...FC. As in Corinthian Football Club!!!

-- Anonymous, March 05, 2001

Oh cr@p, bottom of the league already. Oh well, at least the league administrator can't add up or my goal difference would look a lot worse :-)

-- Anonymous, March 06, 2001

Softie, do my eyes deceive me? Is it possible that your Randomness has made a mistake? Please double our (GAM) points tally forthwith. We have had the Sinclair number crunching all night at the Bill Quay Institute des Hautes Etudes Scientifique confirming our initial estimates and still the answer comes out 1+1=2.

-- Anonymous, March 06, 2001

Oh goody! My spreadsheet is littered with errors. Suicide is a definite option but I'll see if I can fix it first :-(

-- Anonymous, March 06, 2001

Okay, folks, the nature of the beast is that the cunning formulas I use to calculate the results (revolving around your attacking points, defending points and home advantage) round fractions to the nearest whole number. Unfortunately, 0.6 goals in one game and 0.75 in another add up as 1.35 goals which then rounds down to 1 on the table. I can't really see a way out of this, but at least the points will be right and you are all subject to the same oddness so hopefully it won't detract too much from the experience. Sorry.

-- Anonymous, March 07, 2001

Softie I for one really appreciate the amount of work needed to set these things up and thanks.
The prospect of facing Gav's Knackers has made my lads apprehensive and queasy - I just hope that they will be under control.

-- Anonymous, March 07, 2001

Who or what will be under control True?

Your Lads or Gavs Knackers?

-- Anonymous, March 07, 2001

Gus, lets not dwell on the thought. Containment is all we want.

-- Anonymous, March 07, 2001