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THE first cockney Bible, with Jesus speaking in rhyming slang, will be published in May with the endorsement of the Archbishop of Canterbury.

Written by a religious education teacher from the East End of London, the Bible's account of the feeding of the 5,000 in Chapter VI of the Gospel of John becomes Jesus making a "Jim Skinner" (dinner). It describes him feeding 5,000 "geezers" from five loaves of "Uncle Ned" (bread) and two "Lilian Gish" (fish).

The Archbishop of Canterbury, Dr George Carey, who grew up on a council estate in Dagenham, east London, was so impressed with the cockney Bible that he agreed to write the foreword. Dr Carey praised the new translation for taking the Bible back "into the marketplace, into the streets, where it originally took place".

The author, Mike Coles, the head of religious education at Sir John Cass Church of England Secondary School in Stepney, said he had disliked RE as a child and wanted to make it more fun for his pupils.

-- Anonymous, February 26, 2001