So this morning I check my email, and I got a "Tip" at www.justatip.com from someone anonymous telling me that I have a gas problem and that I fart too much at work.

I'm pretty sure it is a joke email from a friend of mine, because I work in the very back corner of the office building and almost no one sees me all day. And the fact that the people I work with don't have any sense of snarkiness to even think about sending me a "tip" like this.

Have any of y'all received "tips" like this? I plan on sending some of these to various friends, because they are a riot!

-- Anonymous, February 07, 2001

Answers

I've never gotten one, but bwa ha ha! new toy!

-- Anonymous, February 07, 2001

Gardanna, I've had so much fun sending them to my husband and the friend who I found out did send me the farting message! It is addictive!

-- Anonymous, February 07, 2001

I got one that said I was a good friend. I sent my husband a secret admirer one, but he figured out it was me. At least that's what he said.

The farting ones are funny, (because farts ARE funny) but I don't think I could bring myself to send a really mean one to someone.

-- Anonymous, February 07, 2001

What a great idea! I'm sending one right now to everyone I know! I'm glad you told us about the farting one, because that really inspires me...heh heh heh (that was my evil laugh).

-- Anonymous, February 07, 2001

The farting one is a riot - I sent that to my husband saying he has stinky farts in bed.

As a sick joke to a friend of mine I sent one saying she had a crusty vagina. I also sent someone a good friend tip. But it wasn't you Shelly! Or was it????

-- Anonymous, February 07, 2001

The "compliments" are the best. Commendable crotch hygiene? Undetectable toupee? That's just funny.

I'm too sensitive for this stuff, though. I'd probably cry if someone sent me one.

-- Anonymous, February 07, 2001

I've just spent the last hour sending those to all my friends. I'm so pleased with myself. And with Nicole. Thanks!!!

-- Anonymous, February 07, 2001

I sent my husband the large penis one!! hee hee! They are SO hilarious!

-- Anonymous, February 07, 2001

Hehehe....I sent my man the good boyfriend, the large penis one, the farting one, the good dresser one...ahhaha...he's going to kill me for cluttering up his inbox. I'm rather enjoying this!

-- Anonymous, February 07, 2001

Sure Gardanna, you're pleased with me now...until I send you the tip about your public crotch grabbing! :)

-- Anonymous, February 07, 2001

Don't worry Nicole, someone beat you to it... Kidding.

-- Anonymous, February 07, 2001

I just find crusty vagina endlessly amusing, for some reason.

-- Anonymous, February 07, 2001

I sent my x-husband the crotch grabbing one. He thought it was funny. No better way to keep up relations with the x than to swap insults-as long as they are insults that can in no way be misconstrued as actual complaints. Like, if I had sent the tiny penis one...

-- Anonymous, February 07, 2001

I don't know, Nicole. Didn't you get one about being funny?

-- Anonymous, February 07, 2001

Robin, D'oh! It is a good thing you two are still friends!

Shelly, uh, maybe I got that "tip"....

-- Anonymous, February 07, 2001

I got one from someone (obviously) on this forum that said: "You're Not Funny." Naturally, I'm crushed. I mean, I carry a gun, own three german shepherds, drive the biggest SUV made and my brand of humor actually offends someone? Hmmmm. Hell, all along I thought it was my LIFESTYLE.

-- Anonymous, February 08, 2001

So they said you're 'Not Funny,' you say? Hmm.

-- Anonymous, February 08, 2001

Well, I,m properly abashed, I can tell you that. When you hang with people whose idea of humor encompasses crusty vagina and fart jokes, you have to be careful what you say.

-- Anonymous, February 08, 2001

I think you're funny, Bubba.

But not as funny as a crusty vagina joke! Now *that* is comedy!

And I do feel lucky to be able to make jokes with my xhusband. I believe the divorce was a lot easier on us because we do not share children. Plus, I moved away quickly and we did not communicate for awhile, so we had time to learn to miss one another and forget the shitty parts. We have much more fun being long distance friends-but not close friends, or best friends. I wish that for everyone who has to have a divorce, but I know that it's not this easy for a lot of people.

-- Anonymous, February 08, 2001

Thank you, Robyn. As for the person who sent the tip, they can take their complaints to www.lpsg.org. They know how to loosen up that tight-ass attitude. Bend wa-a-a-a-ay ovah! Eeeee-ha!

-- Anonymous, February 08, 2001

This site helps me alot

http://www.pinstruck.com/

Put a curse on somebody - I put a lot of curses on spammers

-- Anonymous, February 09, 2001

Bubba, I like you. :-) AND I think you're pretty damn funny.

-- Anonymous, February 09, 2001

Thanks, Shanna. By the way, does anyone know what's become of James?

-- Anonymous, February 09, 2001

I've seen James post a few things recently...I think?

-- Anonymous, February 09, 2001

Good. I'm glad some crusty vagina didn't run him off.

-- Anonymous, February 09, 2001

I sent my friend the one about poor crotch hygiene. She still hasn't figured out who it could've come from.

-- Anonymous, February 10, 2001

Bubba, I hope that the awful person who sent you that tip is suffering the consequences of being such a meanie. I'm sorry that they upset you so much, and if you need anyone to talk to about how hurt you are, feel free to email me.

-- Anonymous, February 10, 2001

Keep the jokes coming Bubba; some people are just plain mean sometimes. We need more humor everwhere these days. (Bubba, Did you get my e-mail? The one last week bounced to la-la land.)

-- Anonymous, February 10, 2001

I sent another one to my husband complimenting him on his manhood. He was cracking up!

-- Anonymous, February 10, 2001

THANK YOU for telling me about this Just a Tip thing. I have sent crusty vagina ones, bad kisser ones, good friend ones, secret admirer ones, etc., to tons of people now, and I absolutely love it.

Of course, my crusty-vagina'd friend still isn't speaking to me.

-- Anonymous, February 10, 2001

I sent a bunch to my best friend Karri, about her having a bad toupée, bad crotch hygiene, etc, and she said she knew they were from me. Then she sent one to her brother's girlfriend about having stinky armpits, and she later overheard the girlfriend talking to her brother about it as if it was totally serious. She was really concerned, because apparently she is obsessive about perspiration and even went to the dermatologist to get injections to stop sweating. Heh.

-- Anonymous, February 10, 2001

Gee! You mean I'm not the only one who can spot a tight-ass?

-- Anonymous, February 10, 2001

Bubba, if that was your passive-aggressive way of accusing me of something, let me just say that I did not send you a tip. I guess it would be nice if only one person considered you unfunny, but alas, it looks like that is not the case.

I'm sorry I offered you my shoulder to cry on, though, now that I hear you've been checking out my ass.

-- Anonymous, February 10, 2001

It's amusing to me how the people who get upset about these tips are the ones who know that they have a ring of truth. For instance, the girl who knows she has a perspiration problem became paranoid about the tip, and person who knows he tries a bit too hard to amuse and fails miserably gets totally bent out of shape about the tip he was sent, etc. Strange, that...

-- Anonymous, February 10, 2001

The tight-ass list grows. Let's see...what kind of bait can I use that will draw the last two out? I'll have to think about it.

-- Anonymous, February 10, 2001

You got two more tips? I don't understand.

-- Anonymous, February 10, 2001

Aha! Another strike! I knew putting in a figure would work! Can I fish or what? (Nope, Nicole, I only got one tip.) Shit, I haven't hard this much fun since I don't know when. Hahahahahaha.

-- Anonymous, February 10, 2001

There's a guy at my work who annoys everyone, and he's been getting a tip in his box every day for the past week. (Okay, I admit, one was from me.) It's kind of funny because his desk is in a very central area in the office, and on Wednesday I was standing nearby when he opened his e-mail. His low, gutteral groan as he read the farting tip (after already having received "smelly feet" and "poor crotch hygiene") was priceless.

All in good humour. :)

-- Anonymous, February 11, 2001

I agree. Actually, I got three tips telling me I was funny, plus a platonic Valentine's but I was having fun with people who thought I was upset about getting the one "You're Not Funny" tip. I mean, upset? For getting diss-ed in Gwentown? Hahahaha. Think about it. Let's go over to the "Beaver" board and watch Oma and Jackie D fuck with James, okay?

-- Anonymous, February 11, 2001

Ooops! I meant the "Valentine" board.

-- Anonymous, February 11, 2001

Do you have beavers on the brain for some reason, Bubba?

Anyway, I'm glad that this is the most fun you've had in a long time. Who knew that an online forum could bring such light and joy into people's lives?

-- Anonymous, February 11, 2001

Jackie, I've always got beavers on the brain. Unfortunately, at my age, that's about the only place I've "got it."

-- Anonymous, February 11, 2001

Hey Bubba, didn't you use to have the bumper sticker "Eat More Beaver"?

-- Anonymous, February 11, 2001

Bingo! That was me alright!

-- Anonymous, February 11, 2001

I think Nicole can fix you right up, Bubba. She apparently has scads of the damn things running around.

-- Anonymous, February 12, 2001

why do you guyz heep talking about beevers. wierdos

-- Anonymous, February 13, 2001

What's a beever?

-- Anonymous, February 14, 2001

They're those lucious little things right between....oh never mind. It'll just cornfuze Tootsie. James

-- Anonymous, February 17, 2001

Aren't those spelled "vagina", James? Or "beaver", if you must be crude about it *fans self delicately in genteel mock Southern outrage*

Now, I want to know what this "beever" thing is that Flopsy is talking about. It intrigues me. I have a mental image of a honeybee running a high temperature. A fevered bee, if you will.

-- Anonymous, February 19, 2001

I'd give a fresh fiver for fewer fevered bees. :-)

-- Anonymous, February 19, 2001

Wow, Paul. Aren't you just Mr. Illiteration...or is it Alliteration? I don't remember. *grumble*

-- Anonymous, February 19, 2001

Paul, I've given much more than that to a fevered beever. But feevered bees? James

-- Anonymous, February 19, 2001

Shanna, it's alliteration. Say the whole thing aloud, it's my attempt at a tongue twister. (Oops, uh... I mean... :-)

James, don't ask me, man, it's Milla's thang. :-)

-- Anonymous, February 19, 2001