A friend sent this to me.I thought they were sort of funny. Or atleast entertaining. Hope you enjoy.

Reasons Why The English Language Is Hard To Learn:

1) The bandage was wound around the wound.

2) The farm was used to produce produce.

3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.

4) We must polish the Polish furniture.

5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.

6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.

7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.

8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.

9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.

10) I did not object to the object.

11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.

12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.

13) They were too close to the door to close it.

14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.

15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.

16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.

17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail.

18) After a number of injections my jaw got number.

19) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.

20) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.

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The following were taken from classified ads and headlines in various newspapers from around the USA:

------------------------------------------------------------------ 83 TOYOTA HUNCHBACK -- $2000

------------------------------------------------------------------ SHAKESPEARE'S PIZZA - FREE CHOPSTICKS

------------------------------------------------------------------ GEORGIA PEACHES - CALIFORNIA GROWN - 89 cents lb.

------------------------------------------------------------------ AMERICAN FLAG - 60 STARS - POLE INCLUDED $100

------------------------------------------------------------------ TIRED OF WORKING FOR ONLY $9.75 PER HOUR? WE OFFER PROFIT SHARING AND FLEXIBLE HOURS. STARTING PAY $7 - $9 PER HOUR.

------------------------------------------------------------------ JOINING NUDIST COLONY! MUST SELL WASHER & DRYER $300.

------------------------------------------------------------------ GAS CLOUD CLEARS OUT TACO BELL.

------------------------------------------------------------------ OPEN HOUSE - BODY SHAPERS TONING SALON - FREE COFFEE & DONUTS

------------------------------------------------------------------ KELLOGG'S POT TARTS - $1.99 box

------------------------------------------------------------------ FULLY COOKED BONELESS SMOKED MAN - $2.09 lb.

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PICK ONE FOR YOUR NEXT T..SHIRT

"Upon the Advice of My Attorney, My Shirt Bears No Message at This Time"

"Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew Up"

"Party - My Crib - Two A.M." (On a baby-size shirt)

'I'm out of estrogen and I've got a gun....any questions?"

"STUPIDITY IS NOT A HANDICAP. Park elsewhere!"

"If there is no God, who pops up the next Kleenex?"

"Suicidal Blonde Twin Kills Sister By Mistake!"

-- Bonnie (josabo1@juno.com), January 22, 2001

Answers

Those were cute, One of my favs my son has on a shirt it says Cowboys its in the genes.

-- kathy h (ckhart55@earthlink.net), January 23, 2001.

Funny, Bonnie! I'll have to print those out and send to my sister. She could use a good laugh! Jan

-- Jan in CO (Janice12@aol.com), January 23, 2001.

In our local paper about a month ago, a lady had her Homemade Jams listed under Building Materials by mistake!

-- Cindy in Ky (solidrockranch@msn.com), January 24, 2001.