My Contribution to the New Forum (Long)

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Sexercises - A Practice

from the book Sexual Energy Ecstasy by David and Ellen Ramsdale

"Sexercises, of course, is a combination of the words "sexual" and "exercises." Sexercises are designed to maximize sex muscle strength and control. Weak flabby muscles cannot do their job well. Your arm muscles can do their job fairly well because you use them every day. Your sex muscles, though, are rarely used in your daily life. You use them to hold in urine or feces until you can get to the bathroom. That's about it.

The monarch of the sex muscles is the pubococcygeus (pew-boh-cox-uh-jee-us), or PC, muscle. This muscle contracts at the rate of one every .8 seconds in both sexes during orgasm. The anal muscles also contract. The contemporary rediscovery of the great value of these muscles for sexual health and pleasure is credited to a Los Angeles physician, Arnold Kegel. He developed the famed Kegel (ka~gill) exercises in the 1950s. It may not be news that you can exercise your sex muscles. The popularity of Kegel exercises has seen to that. But do you know that the Kegel exercises are a rediscovery? Effective sexercises have been practiced in China and India for thousands of years.

The ancient experts viewed the human body-mind as a bucket full of energy with holes in the bottom where life energy leaked out. These holes are the urethral opening, the anal opening and, in the woman, the vaginal opening. It was believed that when these sex muscles were sufficiently strengthened through exercise they sealed the bottom of the bucket.

The Eastern sexercises were developed in cultures that placed less emphasis on the genital orgasm. Currently, sex experts tout the development of the PC muscle and other sex muscles as a way to achieve, intensify, prolong and control genital orgasm in both sexes. Neither approach is better in itself. When less emphasis is placed on getting the orgasmic payoff though, other personal gains such as emotional growth or health benefits may become more noticeable.

Whether or not you focus on having orgasms is not the real issue. That is a matter of personal style. It is also worth noting that some men and women have observed that these sexercises have a significant rejuvenating effect. In our seminars, we ask how many regularly do Kegel or yogic PC muscle exercises. Usually, only a few hands go up. Given the endless emphasis on exercise in this culture, this seems surprising. Perhaps it is guilt about sex, perhaps it is the fact that it is not obvious (until you make love!) that you do these sexercises, as they do not give you big breasts or bulging biceps.

Addicted to appearances, we fail to become artists of love. As the paint brush is to the painter, these sexercises are to the love artist. They are not crude mechanical gestures but symphonies of the body-mind that lead to self-generated waves of bliss. For those so inclined, these methods lead to the awakening of Kundalini, the mystic life force, and the arousal of and union with the cosmic lover within who leads us beyond inner conflict to happiness.

Kegel Exercise

Before you start Kegel muscle squeezing, it is most important that you locate the exact muscle involved. Where is your PC muscle? It stretches between your legs, from your genitals to your anus. It is part of the pelvic floor in both sexes. The standard way to find your PC muscle is to stop and start as you urinate. Do this several times. Women may need to keep the legs open wide so that the muscles in the buttocks don't add confusing signals. Another way is to pretend you've got to hold back a bowel movement and tighten your anal muscles. Do not use the stomach muscles to do this. Men should stand in front of a mirror and make their penis move up and down as they squeeze their PC muscle. Women can delicately place their index and/or middle finger in the vagina and squeeze. The vagina will grasp them, perhaps quite firmly. It may even push them out. The PC muscle itself can be felt in the vagina as a ribbed muscle about one and a half inches in.

Once you have definitely found the PC muscle, start with quick or short Kegel squeezes. Contract the muscle 20 times at about one a second or faster as one session. Do two sessions your first day. Gradually build up to 75 twice a day. When you can comfortably do 75 quickie Kegel contractions twice a day, add sustained or long Kegel movements.

Long Kegel squeezes are equally simple. Instead of holding the muscle contraction for a count of one, hold it for a count of three. Start with 20 of these per session, two sessions a day. Build up to 75 each session twice a day. Take your time. Avoid straining. The PC muscle is just like any other muscle. If you overdo it, it will become sore. You may find that a tightening of the muscles in the stomach and thighs happens no matter what you do at first. This is common. But after the first few days or weeks, when you've completely isolated the muscle, these extra contractions should be hardly noticeable.

You will have built up to 300 reps a day. However, once the PC muscle has been strengthened, a maintenance regime of 150 per day in one three-minute session should be plenty. Make these focused, committed clenches. Concentrate deeply on the physical sensations. You may find this easier if you close your eyes.

Learn to relax between contractions. Without this relaxation the muscles will not grow as quickly. Relaxation is as important to your control as are the contractions. If a man learns how to relax these muscles during sexual intercourse, he can last much longer. It may help to breathe in time with your clenches or to count breaths. You may be holding your breath and not even realize it.

Some people include the bearing down maneuver in their daily work outs. After first tightening, then releasing the PC muscle, push down and out gently as if trying to have a bowel movement. This is the same sequence that you would use for sexual arousal and control. You will feel the action of your stomach muscles and anus as you bear down. We call this a push out. A useful variation is to do sets of reps that pair long Kegel clenches with strong push outs. Try doing these after you've developed good PC muscle strength.

Men can easily add weight training to their Kegel practices. After achieving erection, place a small wet towel on your erect penis. Move this towel up and down. You can increase the size of the towel. Some men even use sandbag weights. A participant in one of our workshops told us that young men in his high school held locker room contests to see how many towels they could lift.

Women can work with cylindrical objects that provide solid resistance.

Use the power of visualization to increase affectiveness. The great bodybuilder Arnold Schwarzeneger worked out using precise mental images to guide the growth of his muscles. Women can see their vagina as a tunnel made up of several muscular bands that can contract or expand at will. These circular bands of muscle are seen growing in size and strength with each contraction. Men can imagine that the PC muscle is a steel cable running between their legs which they can tighten or loosen at will. The steel cable should be seen as growing thicker and stronger with each repetition.

You can affirm as you clench. With a quick Kegel clench say a short positive affirmation such as "Yes" or "Love." With a long Kegel clench you can say a longer affirmation. In the Ananga Ranga, women training in the arts of love are advised to repeat "Kamadeva," the sacred name of the Hindu Cupid, with each clench. Another mantra, said to have great esoteric power, is "Kling."

Don't be surprised if the exercises arouse erotic feelings while you're doing them. This is part of the fun. Whatever your approach, develop your ability to focus your attention on your sensations and feelings for maximum results and enjoyment. Indeed, you may feel waves of bliss that have nothing to do with your environment at the time. They are not caused by an outside stimulus. They are internally generated. You are awakening your natural inborn pleasure potential.

The benefits of the Kegel exercises are numerous. These include getting more in touch with your genitals and sexual feelings, improving the blood flow to these areas (which can be quite healing in itself) and making orgasm more voluntary.

Women can use it to firm up the muscles of the vagina after having a child. Kegel exercises have enabled many pre-orgasmic women to become orgasmic. Muscle strength, sensitivity and control gained through Kegel contraction exercises are known to make genital orgasm during intercourse or Self-loving more voluntary and more intense. Coordinate the Kegel clenches with breathing, visualization and concentration for maximize results and control.

Strong PC muscles will aid men in their practices with ejaculation control.

After two months of dedicated practice, you will probably have achieved mastery over your PC muscle. If you have- you will know by the results in bed-you can maintain good PC muscle tone with occasional workouts. Virtuoso status, though, is achieved and maintained only by working out weekly, if not daily.

Once you get the hang of it, you can do "Kegels" writing, reading, walking, sitting, working, watching TV, listening to music and so on. A solid practice routine should only take about 5 minutes twice a day. The benefits will be great!"

Sexercises - A Practice



-- Rich (howe9@shentel.net), December 05, 2000

Answers

OK, so it's not about politics. So sue me!

-- Rich (howe9@shentel.net), December 05, 2000.

Once you get the hang of it, you can do "Kegels" writing, reading, walking, sitting, working, watching TV, listening to music and so on.

Typing on the computer ;)

..and a one, and a two...heh!

-- Peg (pegmcleod@mediaone.net), December 05, 2000.


Are you trying to say that your girlfriend/wife has a big flabby vagina?

Or is it more a problem of premature ejaculation?

-- Catherine (the@great.one), December 05, 2000.


I want to go back to that discussion about how males can have multiple orgasms. 8-)

-- (kb8um8@yahoo.com), December 05, 2000.

Rich:

I once did Kegels regularly. THEN I read about how if one does Kegels incorrectly, they can actually cause more damage than improvement. As you noted, the only way a female can be sure they're doing a Kegel correctly is if they're in a position to put their finger into the vagina to check. So much for sitting at my desk doing Kegels while I typed at work.

Orgasm can't result in a Kegel done incorrectly. I still think that it's better to leave the Kegels to the body's natural response [in MY case], and I appreciate the fact that SO is coming home from his training class tomorrow, because if I had to look at another sex- oriented thread during my celibate period, I might just have screamed.

-- Anita (Anita_S3@hotmail.com), December 05, 2000.



Catherine: How ever did you know?

Anita, glad to hear you will receive a conjugal visit manana. How long does SO get to stay home? ANSWER: Just long enough.

-- Rich (howe9@shentel.net), December 05, 2000.


"I want to go back to that discussion about how males can have multiple orgasms. 8-)

-- (kb8um8@yahoo.com), December 05, 2000."

Where can I scope that thread out?

-- handymannn (handymannn@handymannn.com), December 05, 2000.


I think it was FutureShock that started that one. Where is Hmm when needed? She always knew where everything was. Maybe I will go find it tomorrow. It might be worth revisiting.

-- SydBarrett (dark@side.moon), December 05, 2000.

Rich-

That's quite a site! Thanks for sharing!

-- Aunt Bee (Aunt__Bee@hotmail.com), December 06, 2000.


It's 11:00 am (EST) - have we each practiced our kegels? Put down the bagel, finish chewing that danish, swallow the last of the coffee and get to work! SO will appreciate it, I'm sure.

-- Rich (howe9@shentel.net), December 06, 2000.


Rich, do you think I'll get a visit from the PC Committee if I ask the secretaries if they've done their Kegels today?

(In a whisper) Our temporary secretaries would probably ask me if that's a new type of diet soda.

-- (kb8um8@yahoo.com), December 06, 2000.


In a whisper) Our temporary secretaries would probably ask me if that's a new type of diet soda.

^^^um, well (whispering) is IT?

-- sumer (shh@aol.con), December 06, 2000.


Kb: FWIW, if the secretary is a Tantra Yogini, thus making it a direct inquiry about her religious practice, the question more than likely would be considered protected speech. Otherwise I'd say you might stand to lose from any exchange regarding Kegels during working hours.

Sincerity contributes mightily towards good communications between people. A nod and a wink as you mention Kegels may be construed as lacking this key element. Or did I gauge your inquiry incorrectly? ;)

-- Rich (howe9@shentel.net), December 06, 2000.


Rich, guess I'd better stick to polite inquiries as to the health of their pets/children.

sumer, yeah! It's a new diet cola that's produced at this new bottling plant over by Case. All natural ingredients! Made by Browns Fans!

(NOT!)

-- (kb8um8@yahoo.com), December 07, 2000.


A key ingredient in child birth classes (which I taught some 20 - oh my gawd! - years ago) was to isolate all the muscle groups. Of course that included the vaginal area and kegel. I would "demonstrate" this very well but when it came down to (no pun intended) that area, it was hard to tell through the clothing. To help explain this, I suggested that the women do this exercise with her partner during sex. The man would definitely know whether the woman got the right muscle or not.

As a rule women should practice this exercise as regularly as any other exercise. It really helps as we age to strengthen the pelvic floor for so many reasons but I won't go into that now.

-- Maria (anon@ymous.com), December 07, 2000.



Maria-

I have been doing these exercises for many years for exactly the reasons you won't go into. I think it would be a public service to the females members of this board if you would share them. Won't you please tell us women your of your experiences and education. They will thank you in the years to come.

-- Aunt Bee (Aunt__Bee@hotmail.com), December 08, 2000.


SMILES BIG @ AUNT BEE "who'd of thunk?"

Um, care to 'share'....taps foot waiting for response.

-- sumer (shh@aol.con), December 08, 2000.


Sorry Aunt Bee, I started to write a response and then got pulled into one of those "brush fire" activities. Here's what I started.

I've never really heard this discussed before but I'm glad to know that women do practice. Recently I found a notice in my gyn's office about a group that promotes this information through classes. At one point I was tempted to call but didn't.

The info I passed to my La Maze students highlighted the benefits for pregnant women. The benefits to locate muscles and practice tensing and relaxing are twofold. During labor, women tend to tense up and it's extremely important to learn how to relax. The only muscle that needs to contract is the uterus (weighing two pounds at delivery time). So if the women can recognize which muscles are contracted, they should practice the relaxation technique. The other reason for tensing and relaxing is muscle building. We all know the benefits of a toned muscle, which of course becomes more important as we age. A toned muscle can help us stay young.

-- Maria (anon@ymous.com), December 08, 2000.


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