Oh my...........

greenspun.com : LUSENET : Unk's Wild Wild West : One Thread

http://www.cis.ufl.edu/~dtc/lists/shit.html

I cant believe I found this shit.

Link 0 please.?

-- sumer (shh@aol.con), December 04, 2000

Answers

Dodo

-- (kb8um8@yahoo.com), December 04, 2000.

BAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Lincoln-Log Shit: The kind of Shit that is so huge you're afraid to flush without first breaking it into smaller pieces with the toilet brush.

Yep, around these parts we call them "porcelain scrapers". :^D

-- Mr. Happy (happy@cdo.net), December 04, 2000.


Holy Shit!!!

Busting a gut laffen!!!

-- Peg (pegmcleod@mediaone.net), December 04, 2000.


One of life's greatest mysteries:

Why does some shit float and other shit sink???

Deano

-- Deano (deano@luvthebeach.com), December 04, 2000.


Deano,

Time to head to the Tiki Bar where these conundrums can be thoughtfully resolved and or studied till everyone is too drunk to give a shit,ok,send moi to the puniteniary : )

-- capnfun (capnfun1@excite.com), December 04, 2000.



Second Wave Shit: This happens when you're done Shit-ing and you've pulled your pants up to your knees and you realize that you have to Shit some more.

^^^^omg!!!!! the above WAS my weekend...haa haa.

ROFLMAO.......come on be honest, who has NOT ever had any of the type described on the list at least ONE time?

-- sumer (shh@aol.con), December 04, 2000.


Capn

As cold as it is here today, the Tiki Bar still sounds like an awesome idea!

As long as the drinks are flowin', who gives a shit how cold it is!

Sumer

I HATE WHEN THAT HAPPENS!

Deano

-- Deano (deano@luvthebeach.com), December 04, 2000.


Upper Class Shit: The kind of Shit that doesn't smell.

I don't remember having any of these :)...did I just write that...LOL!

-- Peg (pegmcleod@mediaone.net), December 04, 2000.


capn~

To the punitentiary you GO! LOL

-- Aunt Bee (Aunt__Bee@hotmail.com), December 04, 2000.


I had to close the door at work cause I laughed so hard. Hope you don't mind sumer that I passed this link along...

-- (Sheeple@Greener.Pastures), December 04, 2000.


Too funny! Amazing what one can find without even trying. Thanks!

-- Maria (anon@ymous.com), December 04, 2000.

Hooooooie, my sides ache. We never outgrow bathroom humor.

-- Lars (lars@indy.net), December 04, 2000.

Deano, you asked, "Why does some shit float and other shit sink???"

According to a book I read a few years ago (Rules of Thumb), if your shit floats, it means you have too much fat in your diet.

(But why I remembered that shit when I can't remember all the shit I'm supposed to remember, I can't explain.)

-- I'm Here, I'm There, (I'm Everywhere,@So.Beware), December 04, 2000.


There is a column in my local freebee newspaper (the Washington City Paper) called "The Straight Dope". It explains matters of science which have puzzled us all.

A few years ago, the column addressed the question "why is shit brown?" Bet you all have wondered about that.

The answer turns out to be simple - dead blood cells.

-- Peter Errington (petere@ricochet.net), December 04, 2000.


...and another little factoid to impress the guests at the next cocktail party: Over half of all fecal matter is composed of dead microbes. (All these little tidbits of information are coming back to me now... and it worries me...)

-- I'm Here, I'm There, (I'm Everywhere,@So.Beware), December 04, 2000.


You win the prize, Peter.

Q: Why is poop brown?

A: The color comes mainly from bilirubin, a pigment that arises from the breakdown of red blood cells in the liver and bone marrow. The actual metabolic pathway of bilirubin and its byproducts in the body is very complicated, so we will simply say that a lot of it ends up in the intestine, where it is further modified by bacterial action. But the color itself comes from iron. Iron in hemoglobin in red blood cells gives blood its red color, and iron in the waste product bilirubin gives rise to its brown color.

The previous information (and a WHOLE LOT more) can be found at: smellypoop.com

BTW, I can't believe their is an actual web site named smellypoop.com. What WILL they think of next...

-- Mr. Happy (happy@cdo.net), December 04, 2000.


you forgot=the black-scary-shit!! you freak-you think your dying you got a bleeding ulcer or cancer.

THEN you remember-last-nite you drank 1/2 a bottle of pepto-bismol!!!

-- al-d. (dogs@zianet.com), December 05, 2000.


How Sweet!

-- Barry (bchbear863@cs.com), December 05, 2000.

Or the famous "shitn' a blue streak" = the mornin' after a bottle or two of red wine,this can be very alarming before the cob webs have fully cleared.

-- capnfun (capnfun1@excite.com), December 05, 2000.

I don't know if anyone noticed, but on the smellypoop.com site linked a few posts above, there's also an option where you can send gift poop in several different varieties. Anonymously, of course, and I assume they accept major credit cards. I just mention this because Christmas is coming, and some might be stuck for the perfect gift for that Special Someone...

-- I'm Here, I'm There, (I'm Everywhere,@So.Beware), December 05, 2000.



-- (p@u.poop), December 05, 2000.

I'm Here

That makes sense however this shit still puzzles me. There have been times (and I know I'm not the only one) where, in the same shit, a turd will sink and another turd will float.

How come???

Deano

-- Deano (deano@luvthebeach.com), December 05, 2000.


Deano;

This disparity in relative flotation rates within the same session beats the shit outta me, too. But that won't stop me from making a wild-ass guess: I believe it takes five hours for food to travel stem-to-stern (so to speak). In that five hours, a person could have ingested one thing (non-fatty), then by the time it made its way to the large intestine, they might have eaten something fatty which caught up in the L.I. with the non-fatty stuff and they both made it to the finish line at the same time, to the cheers of the crowd in the bleachers.

In other words, I haven't the foggiest idea.

-- I'm Here, I'm There, (I'm Everywhere,@So.Beware), December 05, 2000.


I'm Here

Well that shit makes sense too!!

The human body just amazes the shit outa me sometimes........

Deano

-- Deano (deano@luvthebeach.com), December 05, 2000.


Shit Happens :)

-- Peg (pegmcleod@mediaone.net), December 05, 2000.

I've waited a long time for this subject. I'm an expert on shit. Does a bear shit in the woods? Does a farmer shit other places other than in his bathroom? You bet! It's been a secret for a long time. Manure spreaders ain't just for cleaning out the steer side on a Saturday. When you are at the barn and that time calls ya, you just drop em and hang your ass over the side rail of the John Deere pto driven No.162 model. Timothy hay works best for wipin and stay away from brome grass varieties cause it draws blood and takes time to heal. I'm glad I had the opportunity to share this thought with others.

-- Boswell (fundown@thefarm.net), December 05, 2000.

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