If your too stupid to punch a ballot properly...

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1. You shouldn't be voting anyway.

2. You're a total idiot, and it's astonishing that you managed to survive to voting age without accidentally eating or drinking something from a container with a skull on it, or driving yourself off of a cliff.

3. You should be castrated with a pair of rusty sissors, so that you don't reproduce and produce any more retards that, never work, and can't handle something a rabid sewer rat could manage with flying colors.

Sh*t, those morons piss me off... and do you notice how ALL OF THEM SEEM TO HAVE "VOTED" FOR ALGORE?!? It's obvious, only lazy wellfare leeches, traitors and complete morons; vote for Bore, since they want the government to take care of them, being that they're to incompetant to handle punching a hole in a piece of paper... food for thought...

-- MrX (MrX@Freedom.org), November 25, 2000


How about people who don't know that "you are" is actually "you're", not "your"? Or who can't spell "incompetent" correctly? Pot calling the kettle, etc, etc.

-- (Who's@moron.you), November 25, 2000.

Mr X-and only ignorant motherfuckers like you voted for Bush, right? What right do you have, you stupid fuck, to call 50 million people lazy welfare leeches, traitors, and moron? Are you so far down the food chain that you think anyone who disagrees with you falls into these categories? How much did you drink today you sloppy, good for nothing, beer-bellied detritus of a human being? Your brain power amounts to a 5 watt bulb, and while you are protected by the first amendment your speech smells fouler than a bums vomit on a hot summer morning.

Go back to your batchelor pad, patriot boy, and buy a ticket to OZ-I here they are giving out brains there.

Oh, and by the way, republican pus, do you apply the same logic to overseas voters who could not follow instructions? And I do not mean postmarks, shit for brains. Hey, a person like you who has so much contempt for your fellow americans has no idea what america is about. Go join your ku klux klan buddies, or better yet READ THE CONSTITUTION-including the amendements, oh brilliant one, and you will see that we are accorded EQUAL RIGHTS UNDER THE LAW. So your appalachian brethren, sucking on welfare, are equal under the law to your so-called patriot friends.

-- FutureShock (gray@matter.think), November 26, 2000.

Oh my! FS is using quite a different tone than his earlier tome on the election. Somehow I suspect he must be a democrat.

-- JoseMiami (josenmiami@yahoo.com), November 26, 2000.


I merely reflect back at people a picture of themselves. My politics are irrelevant-Mr X attacked a large percentage of our population and miscategorized them-I decided to reflect that ugliness back to him. Certainly I will show a civil side when I am among civil people, as on the florida supreme court thread i started.

-- FutureSHock (gray@matter.think), November 26, 2000.

Hey Future Shock, you are sounding an awful lot like Hawk. Same immature screeching and pleading such as: “I merely reflect back at people a picture of themselves.” That’s Hawk’s standard retort when called to task and attempts to justify his pre-teen behavior. Very interesting. And yes, we all know what a bleeding heart liberal you are so you needn’t remind us how pathetically ignorant your slant on life is. Your brand of morality has taken on a foul odor and tends to offend the thinking folks of the world. Now that your face looks like an eggplant why not give me your read on the Reverend Al Sharpton and his trip to Miami. What a fabulous thought…let the Reverend decide our next President.

-- I (h@ve.spoken), November 26, 2000.

I don't think the real Future Shock wrote that. He is above that.

-- Is that troll (stealing@handles.again?), November 26, 2000.

I wouldn't be so quick to call someone stupid. I don't know smirk about Votomatic machines, but the guy who created them does. I also don't know if problems occurred more in one district than another, or even if only one or two particular machines were involved.

If you're referencing the butterfly ballot voters, the instructions clearly stated "punch the hole to the right of your candidate". Some folks READ instructions and follow them, and some folks don't. Instructions aren't always clear OR correct [just in case you've never tried putting together "SOME assembly required" articles.]

I'd admit that there's no good course of action to enfranchise the voters involved with these problems. Maybe we could ask them how to spell scissors?

-- Anita (Anita_S3@hotmail.com), November 26, 2000.

Maybe we could ask them how to spell scissors?

Double Jeopardy Question: also ask them what each half is called individually.

-- I'm Here, I'm There (I'm Everywhere@so.beware), November 26, 2000.


-- cin (cin@cin.cin), November 26, 2000.

Double Jeopardy Question: also ask them what each half is called individually.

What is a blade?

Did I win?

-- (Edward@Scissor.hands), November 26, 2000.

A blade? Sounds good to me (I always thought it was a "sciss," but that's probably because my mother was scared by Allen Sherman when she was pregnant with me). You win one extra vote, to be taken at any time (but hopefully not on the same ballot).

-- I'm Here, I'm There (I'm Everywhere@so.beware), November 26, 2000.

First off, I don't drink, do drugs, smoke, have sex, ect, ect, ect, so fuck off fuckershock. Second, I DON'T live in the mountains, and what I've argued is based on...

-- MrX (MrX@Freedom.org), November 26, 2000.

First off, I don't drink, do drugs, smoke, have sex, ect, ect, ect, so fuck off fuckershock. Second, I DON'T live in the mountains, and what I've argued is based on... WHAT I SEE!!! EVery single Bore supporter I know (about 300), that is getting a gov't handout(at taxpayer expense), and all of them want bore since they know they can get free stuff from people that actually work with the Commie Bastard in power!!! So fuck you, asshole!

-- MrX (MrX@Freedom.org), November 26, 2000.

Don’t have sex? That will mess up your mind for sure.

-- I (h@ve.spoken), November 26, 2000.

Mr x:

Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant. Classify 50 million people based on your, I am sure, exaggerated amount of 300 Gore supporters. Who taught you deductive reasoning, asshole? I guess I should realize how inferior your intellect is, and leave you alone, as there is no sense arguing with people like you and I have, whose shit-for-brains speaks more loudly than any insult or response I could devise.

-- MaybeFutureShockMaybeNot (gray@doesitmatter.think), November 26, 2000.

"First off, I don't drink, do drugs, smoke, have sex, ect, ect, ect,"

Translation: I sit around my house all day eating spray cheese from a can and stroking my prong while I wait for reruns of Cops to come on my black-and-white TV.

"so fuck off fuckershock."

Translation: I'm very cross with you.

"Second, I DON'T live in the mountains,"

Translation: I might actually live in the mountains, but I'll be damned if I tell you so.

"and what I've argued is based on... WHAT I SEE!!!"

Translation: if it's not on TV, I don't believe it. Did you know that pro wrestling isn't fake?

"EVery single Bore supporter I know (about 300),"

Translation: These are the people I met while standing in the line to collect my unemployment check, as well as the nice people I met at the Red Cross blood donation center.

"that is getting a gov't handout(at taxpayer expense),"

Translation: I am excluding the Bush supporters that are getting government handouts, as well as those who are hoping to get school vouchers, which will also be government handouts.

"and all of them want bore since they know they can get free stuff from people that actually work with the Commie Bastard in power!!!"

Translation: I really need Bush's prescription drug benefit, because I'm out of lithium. I hate choosing between my lithium and my Night Train wine.

"So fuck you, asshole!"

Translation: I'm very cross with you.

-- MrY (y.not@blowme.com), November 26, 2000.

Maybe this will shut up Mr.X, the "if your too stupid to use a contraction" moron.

Dimpled ballots blamed on faulty machines

By John Pacenti, Palm Beach Post Staff Writer

Saturday, November 25, 2000

Explaining the dimple isn't so simple. But that's what the presidency of the United States might come to -- thousands of ballots where voters have left dimples instead of clear holes.

On Friday Democrats tried to persuade the Palm Beach County Canvassing Board that dimples on thousands of Palm Beach County punch- card ballots resulted from imperfect machinery -- not waffling voters, as Republicans contend.

And one county elections official had the driest reasoning: Voters just didn't push hard enough.

Democrats trotted out the county's former elections chief, a Yale professor and the designer of the Votomatic voting machine used in Palm Beach County.

The trio, led by former county Supervisor of Elections Jackie Winchester, cast their blame on the voting machine, particularly the thin strips of plastic or rubber under the ballot that are supposed to ensure the chad -- and thus an election -- is not left hanging.

Winchester said she became concerned when her daughter, who was counting ballots by hand for the canvassing board, noticed a number of ballots had dimples in the left-hand column but nowhere else.

In those cases, the canvassing board often discounts the presidential vote, reasoning that the voter had no vote-punching problems in other areas of the ballot and therefore didn't intend to vote for president.

But Winchester said there's a reason why the left column creates more dimples than other columns: it gets used more often and so it takes the most abuse.

She said the same phenomenon occurred 10 years ago among some knock- off Votomatics that had plastic instead of rubber strips. Those strips are key because they help remove and funnel the punched chad down into the belly of the voting machine.

Because the plastic strips had no give, somehow the tabs built up in the well, and dimpled ballots were the result. The strips were replaced, but Winchester wonders now if the problem has resurfaced. "I believe, based on what I'm seeing here, that those plastic strips probably have hardened again," she said.

A dimpled chad can also occur, Winchester continued, if the strip gets worn out, as is often the case in the much-used first column. The worn strips promote chad build-up or allow the ballots to bend when the object is to make them break.

That is why the first column hasn't been used in recent municipal elections, she said. It was used in the general election because of the large number of candidates. The 1996 election also had many ballots for which counting machines recorded no presidential vote, she said.

"That election wasn't close so we didn't scrutinize the ballots like they are doing now," Winchester said.

Democrats also pointed out that in 1998, the left-column U.S. Senate race had fewer votes recorded than lesser-known state races in other columns: comptroller, secretary of state and agriculture commissioner.

Winchester, who was the county's supervisor of elections for 24 years before stepping down after 1996, said there must be a mechanical explanation for the 10,300 "under-votes" -- ballots where the machine counted no presidential vote.

"It just defies reason that thousands of people went to the polls and they just rested their stylus and did not want to vote for president," Winchester said. "There's something wrong here."

Yale University statistician Nicholas Hengartner said the 2.2 percent under-vote rate in Palm Beach County was 80 percent higher than the average rate in the 48 other counties that kept track of under-votes.

And William S. Rouverol, the 83-year-old designer of the Votomatic, said the canvassing board must take into account wear and tear on the machines.

"If there is any indentation discernible it should be counted," said Rouverol, flown in from Berkeley, Calif. "I think they are dead wrong if they are rejecting those ballots," he said.

County elections officials, though, defended the machines, saying they were all maintained properly and checked before the Nov. 7 election. The wells were cleaned and the strips treated to keep them soft, they said.

"Year after year, they get sprayed with silicone, and if anything is torn, they are replaced," said Tony Enos, the county's voting system manager. "So they are all up to par."

Republicans mocked the Democrats' arguments, calling them a last- ditch stab to try to erase Bush's 930-vote lead in the state that will decide the U.S. presidency.

The GOP partisans praised the canvassing board's decision Friday to stick to its strict standard of counting dimples.

"I thought it was such an implausible ploy that the Republican team didn't even need to answer," said GOP attorney Burton Odelson. "Isn't it strange you are hearing this now from the losing side?"

He said an under-vote for president is not unusual and that it only stands out now because the ballots are being so scrutinized. "People change their mind," Odelson said.

Or they just mess up, the county's Enos said.

"It's basically the voter," Enos said. "Think about it, if you are shoving an inch piece of steel into a card, it's going to make a hole. They must not be fully functioning with the machine."

The Democrats' threesome later headed for Tallahassee for a news conference in the evening. Their combined efforts, backed by the Gore camp, was designed to get as many dimpled ballots counted by the three-member canvassing board in Palm Beach County. The frequent rejection of dimples may become an issue Gore raises if he contests the election results later.

Boca Raton voter Linda J. Ehrlich signed an affidavit saying her Votomatic was faulty. The 47-year-old lawyer had no problems voting for other races, but when she tried to vote for president her stylus would not detach the chad despite at least three stabs.

"I was forced to tear off the perforated chad with my fingers," she said.

But Winchester's strong stand in favor of counting dimples contradicts her 1990 position when she was a member of the canvassing board and opposed including such votes.

"I think what we are seeing now is that was not a good rule," she said.

Staff writer George Bennett contributed to this story.

-- Old Softy (old@softy.com), November 26, 2000.

rofl RE: the ticket to Oz comment, thanks FS, I needed the laugh this am.


-- (shh@aolll.com), November 27, 2000.

Ok you gore loving traitors:

1. I am not unemployed 2. I am a college student 3. I live in the suburbs.

so, fuck off.

-- MrX (MrX@Freedom.org), November 27, 2000.

I am a college student

Thank you for the explaination.


-- (lol@you.lol), November 27, 2000.

Welcome, Mr. X-valedictorian candidate at that venerable institution: Correspondence U.-hey, let me know when you graduate, I have a chimney that needs to be swept.

-- SydBarrett (dark@side.moon), November 27, 2000.

If you're too stupid to know that the word you're look for is "You're," rather than "Your" -- as in, "If Your Too Stupid To Punch A Ballot Properly" -- then you probably shouldn't have a web site. But it's not too suprising, given your web content. But come on, man, it's pretty funny, isn't it? I mean, there you are making fun of those guys for being uneducated or whatever, and you can't spell, and no one who contributed to your site seems able to manage it either -- and since that's your criteria for having a job, or whatever, then that makes your guys unemployable, too. It explains why politicians from your party always run such huge deficits, since they seem to have problems on the basic math- and-spelling side.

Listen, it's a simple rule. You use "Your" when something belongs to you: "Your ballot," "your election," "your website." "You're" is a a contraction, and it's what you wanted -- it's "You are" run togther, as in "If you are too stupid..." Similarly, the wold "Goodbye" is actually a contraction of an old middle-ages farewell" "Good be with ye."

Finally, Butterfly Ballots run a 3-5% error rate regardless of who votes on them -- seniors, juniors, the elderly, the high school or college educated. The human brain tends to naturally "scan" either up and down or across, but doesn't quickly perceive information going in both directions; it's like an reading a sentence like this:

With words Over here and then Here and then Back over here again Before coming over here

Instead of a sentence like this one that goes straight down,

Or one like this that goes straight across.

Hope the last couple of years have worked out well for you.

-- Tony Enos (grammarian@diction.com), March 11, 2003.

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