but he has been all too elusive recently. How am I meant to raise his media profile if he keeps disappearing? It's one thing to go into tactical seclusion if you're Greta Garbo. It's another to go into hiding when you're still on the slippery slope to fame. He hasn't had an appearance in months. Next thing I know, he'll be joining Nottingham Forest behind my back.

-- Anonymous, October 03, 2000

Answers

I told you no good would come of it. He'd have been far better off if he'd stayed with me. I could manage him in the way you never have been able to. What do they say aboot wimmin'?

-- Anonymous, October 03, 2000

Piss off you two, I'm trying to sell him to Man U for twice what he's worth as MR Ferguson is a friend of mine.

-- Anonymous, October 03, 2000

What do they say aboot wimmin'?

The Americans and Australians win loads of gold medals in it.

-- Anonymous, October 03, 2000

Aye, he was supposed to turn out for Orient. Obviously the idea of being near the London Toon brought him to his senses.

-- Anonymous, October 04, 2000