FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY No Grand Slam For Gore

WASHINGTON - "I STAND before you as my own man," said Al Gore, amid the whooping cheers of Democrats desperate for a big comeback speech.

And Al tried to give it to them.

He didn't dispel the robot image. He confessed that he's not Mr. Excitement. But for 40 minutes Gore rocked the L.A. hall with an energetic, substantial pitch to paint himself as the savior of American families and prosperity.

He almost chased away the Dems' high anxiety that Gore's a lackluster underdog to George W. Bush and that they're slipping inexorably behind in the 2000 chase.

Almost.

Trouble is, Al's a haunted man - hard as he runs, he can't get away from Bill Clinton's libidinous phantom.

Even as Gore swore his independence last night as "my own man," the chains of Bill Clinton's sex scandal rattled in the hall.

The uninvited guest on Gore's crucial night was Robert Ray, the hard-nosed investigator handpicked by Ken Starr as independent counsel in charge of pursuing Clinton.

Hours before Gore's major speech, someone in Ray's office leaked word that he'd empaneled a grand jury to again dig into the Monica Lewinsky affair. Ray's doing groundwork for Starr's ultimate dream: indict Clinton and put him in jail after Jan. 21, 2001.

The leak's timing matched any skullduggery by Richard Nixon's team of Dirty Trick schemers. G. Gordon Liddy and Howard Hunt, eat your hearts out.

The ploy to put a damper on Gore's speech - and remind voters of Clinton's shadow - was so egregious that even the Bush camp rebelled. "We think it's wrong and inappropriate," said Bush spokeswoman Karen Hughes.

(Translation: Our fingerprints aren't on this caper.)

Sure, Ray's leak may energize the Dems' fury and draw battle lines in a mean-spirited race. "This is what we needed to put us over the top," said Rep. Charles Ranger, D-N.Y. "It turns on the anger."

But Ray's revived investigation of Bill & Monica means the Clinton saga will keep nagging Dems throughout the fall, a woeful distraction for a Gore campaign struggling against Bush's lead.

Lucky Bush. He can stay above the Clinton grand-jury mess while coyly repeating his mantra to "return decency and honor to the White House." Or, as Dick Cheney said in his Philly speech, "We are all a little weary of the Clinton story."

When Gore at midday heard about the leak of the Clinton probe, he shrugged his shoulders, according to campaign boss Bill Daley, and said, "Forget it - let's get on with it."

He tried hard. Gore was under heavy pressure. The polls kept hitting him with bad, bad news. Forty-seven percent said they wouldn't vote for Gore no matter what, a severe handicap. Bush was ahead by an astonishing 40 points among white, married, working moms. Worse, the Battleground poll showed the Dems' old-styled convention wasn't getting a bounce but losing ground.

Gore, his nervous backers admitted, had to stand and deliver a stemwinder that turned the tide, much as Bush's daddy did in 1988 to overcome Mike Dukakis' lead.

So how'd Al do?

For a man who famously reinvents himself daily, Gore's best move last night was to cloak himself in the cape of a populist fighter for plain folks, a profitable theme against the Bush/Cheney "All-Oil" ticket.

"I've fought the powerful, and I'll stand up against them and for you," shouted Gore, who later named the evil forces: "Big Tobacco, Big Oil, Big Polluters, Big HMOs."

Despite Gore's efforts to portray himself as battler for families, though, his speech was a familiar litany aimed more at Democrats than swing voters. He preached standard dogma: no Supreme Court justices who'd overturn Roe vs. Wade, no raising the Social Security age, a patients' bill of rights, campaign finance reform.

I thought Gore's best moment came near his spiel's close when he admitted his blandness.

"Some say I'm too serious, I talk too much substance, and maybe I did that tonight. But the presidency is not a popularity contest. I'm not the most exciting politician, but I'll work hard and never let you down."

That was Gore using his wonkishness as a strength. But Gore's speechwriters did him a disservice. His rhetoric had no lift of poetry, not one line that could be remembered 24 hours later. Worse, there wasn't a speck of humor to enliven the night. Nor a sly jab at Republicans to add spice.

In comparison with Dubya's performance in Philadelphia, I'd rate Gore a shade behind. He didn't have Bush's scripted wit, his vinegary ridicule of the opposition or folksy style. Gore said in effect, "I'm no entertainer, but I'll fight for you."

Dancing, chortling Dems in the arena celebrated Gore's speech. But I doubt if outside the hall Al's meat-and-potatoes substance changed the polls. Or hit a home run for Al on the likability scale.

Pointedly, although he boasted of the hot economy, Gore only mentioned Bill Clinton once.

Not to worry. Starr's appointed gumshoe Robert Ray will keep reminding the country that Clinton's a hunted man, and the ghost that Al Gore cannot shed.

Looks like a nasty campaign. Anybody heard from Willie Horton? ) 2000 Philadelphia Newspapers Inc.

-- 2000 Election Watcher (2000@election.watcher), August 18, 2000

Answers

Al Gore was awesome last night! He specifically spelled out the details of how he intends to approach every single one of the most important issues for the people, something that Junior will never do without lying like his Dad.

-- (hoist.your@white.flag.repubs), August 18, 2000.

I assume your white flag is your anomynous handle.

-- Just another chicken Gore Supporter (go@all.theway), August 18, 2000.

This was my favorite absurdity in the article:

But Gore's speechwriters did him a disservice. His rhetoric had no lift of poetry, not one line that could be remembered 24 hours later. Worse, there wasn't a speck of humor to enliven the night. Nor a sly jab at Republicans to add spice.

In comparison with Dubya's performance in Philadelphia, I'd rate Gore a shade behind. He didn't have Bush's scripted wit, his vinegary ridicule of the opposition or folksy style. Gore said in effect, "I'm no entertainer, but I'll fight for you."

It's a sad statement on the American public that a politician should actually be criticized for discussing the issues and not spewing out clever one-liners. But wait, if we're supposed to have a President who entertains us, then why are we so upset about the Clinton scandal? Wasn't he a really entertaining guy?

Seems to me that when we look for an "entertainer" as a President, we get exactly what we asked for, which is not necessarily what we wanted.

-- (hmm@hmm.hmm), August 18, 2000.

A sense of humor and quick wit is an important qualification for a President. If used properly it can help releive tension in very delicate circumstances.

-- think again (please@use.brain), August 18, 2000.

A sense of humor and quick wit is an important qualification for a President. If used properly it can help releive tension in very delicate circumstances.

LOL. What circumstances would those be? Telling dirty jokes at the Arab-Israeli summit? Whoopee cushions in the oval office? Fake vomit on the White House furniture? Clinton has been a real goofball lately, accepting that fake Oscar and all. Do you think this makes him a better President?

-- (hmm@hmm.hmm), August 18, 2000.

Lightening up a tense situation. It is obvious that you uncapable of understanding this. Just go back to watching your Flintstones reruns.

-- hmm is not (at@the.brightest), August 18, 2000.

I'm voting for Gore because his daughters are the bomb.

-- dizzy D (DizzyD@l.l), August 18, 2000.

I understand, but I asked for an example. You haven't provided one. Nor have you addressed the issue of whether Clinton's "entertaining" personality made him a better President. You have, however, continuously changed your anonymous handle while simultaneously deriding another poster for having an anonymous handle. Perhaps you should try politics. LOL.

-- (hmm@hmm.hmm), August 18, 2000.

How exactly would you know how many times I have changed my handle. Perhaps you could find a suitable career in the sanitation field. But wah your hands.

-- hmm is not (at@the.brightest), August 18, 2000.

LOL!

-- maggy (fruits@and.vegetables), August 18, 2000.

It's been 2 minutes and there is no answer from hmm. I guess they have admited defeat.

-- hmm is starting to (get@a.clue), August 18, 2000.

LOL, yes of course. So then are you saying that each of these anonymous handles are different people, all of whom are incapable of answering a simple question?

Perhaps you should consider group therapy. You might get a discount. LOL.

-- (hmm@hmm.hmm), August 18, 2000.

LOL! Perhaps LOL! you should LOL! visit the LOL! therapist for LOL! your nervous giggle LOL! that you apparently cannot LOL! control. LOL!

-- hmm is still (not@getting.it), August 18, 2000.

Oh grow up.

-- I can use fake handles too (you@goofy.poster), August 18, 2000.

I can't help but laugh at the absurdity of your so- called "arguments." But thanks for noticing. And you still haven't answered my questions, but I don't expect you ever will. LOL

-- (hmm@hmm.hmm), August 18, 2000.

LOL you LOL reall LOL told LOL him LOL off!

-- LOL (L@O.L), August 18, 2000.

Your questions were idiotic rhetoric and not worth answering. I suppose you were being serious and acutally think they should be answered?

-- hmm (is@a.simpleton), August 18, 2000.

Yes, I expected an answer. Although, perhaps from you, that was expecting too much.

LOL!

-- (hmm@hmm.hmm), August 18, 2000.

LOL. What circumstances would those be? Telling dirty jokes at the Arab-Israeli summit? Whoopee cushions in the oval office? Fake vomit on the White House furniture? Clinton has been a real goofball lately, accepting that fake Oscar and all. Do you think this makes him a better President?

What circumstances would those be? Anything that needs a quick lightening of the mood. All of your suggested ideas are more in the line of practical jokes. Do you think your suggested ideas are good ones. I don't. No I don't think Clinoton acting as a goofball makes him a better president. Do you?

-- answering stupid questions (with@good.answers), August 18, 2000.

These two dimwits make creep look intersting.

-- tired of (these@boring.dweebs), August 18, 2000.

Answer his moronic questions, and watch him run and hide.

-- hmm is (now@in.hiding), August 18, 2000.

What circumstances would those be? Anything that needs a quick lightening of the mood.

Yes, you already said "Lightening up a tense situation" which is essentially the same thing. I was asking for an example.

All of your suggested ideas are more in the line of practical jokes.

That is correct. The original article was pointing out the lack of clever one-line catch phrases which, to me, are more like jokes than attempts to defuse tense situations.

Do you think your suggested ideas are good ones. I don't.

Me neither. Hey, look, we agree! LOL.

No I don't think Clinoton acting as a goofball makes him a better president. Do you?

Not in the least. But hey, maybe he was just using his sense of humor and quick wit to releive tension in very delicate circumstances.

-- (hmm@hmm.hmm), August 18, 2000.

Well then Clinotn should also use some common sense

-- maybe hmm (is@bill .clinton), August 18, 2000.

LOL! You LOL!

-- LOL (L@o.L), August 18, 2000.

Would everyone stop using my initials!

-- Little Old Lil (looney@out.long), August 18, 2000.

hmm, I'm sorry. I was incredibly rude to you, and I apologize. I just woke up on the wrong side of the bed and made an idiot out of myself. Please accept my apology.

-- I'm in the wrong (I@in.wrong), August 18, 2000.

I doubt that anyone will argue that Al Gore isn't Bill Clinton as far as speeches go. He confessed this himself last night. He KNOWS he's got a "totem-pole" image and I think he'll loosen up with experience. I'd certainly not expected Lieberman to be as relaxed as he was, and was pleasantly delighted by HIS speaking abilities.

Bill's a natural when it comes to speaking. Al's more a doer. I'm looking for a presidential candidate that will represent ME. I live in Texas, and Bush doesn't represent ME. If Bush represents YOU, by all means, vote for him.

-- Anita (Anita_S3@hotmail.com), August 18, 2000.

Al Gore is the man for the job. No doubt about it.

-- Debra (Thisis@it.com), August 18, 2000.