Doubts about college

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Right before you left for college, did you start having major doubts? Not about moving away from home necessarily, but just in general?

-- Anonymous, August 09, 2000

Answers

When I left for college, I doubted everything. I only applied to the school I am attending (College of the Atlantic) and a state university as a back up. I got ready to go to COA and just started questioning everything : What if I hate it, what if everyone hates me, etc, etc. But Things worked out fine. It took me longer to adjust than I expected though, so give it at least a couple months to feel comfortable. That's my two cents.

-- Anonymous, August 09, 2000

I leave in 18 days and I am operating without doubt. I think it's going to be fun.

-dan

-- Anonymous, August 09, 2000


I'm leaving for university right now (okay. not right NOW. in September, though) and i'm freaking. About EVERYTHING. I'll have several days where i feel fine - i keep telling myself "I'm not going to die, i'm not going to die!". And then something will happen (i get a new toaster, i give my favourite lava lamp to my sister, dad says "You HAVE to do your homework this year", etc., etc.) and the crushing realization of what i'm really going to be doing - 4 hours away from home, no less - hits me.

I kindda get the feeling if i don't stop worrying NOW, i'm going to be home by Xmas.

-- Anonymous, August 09, 2000


I suppose I did, but I refused to acknowledge them. I kind of took the "close your eyes and jump" approach and hoped that I wouldn't land in a pile of shit or something.

School is great though. I'm about to start my second year and can't wait.

-- Mike (www.geocities.com/dreamboi81)

-- Anonymous, August 09, 2000


Doubts are a part of adulthood! Better get used to it, because starting now, your life can only get more complicated. Every time you turn around, something is trying to knock you down. But it can only get to you if you let it. Going to college is perhaps the best move one can make in this society. Before going away to college, I doubted everything, and when I actually got there, all I could think about was turning tail and dashing home, even though my home life was formidable, but after a week, I got into the groove, and realized that sometimes a huge life-disrupting change is exactly what one needs to gain perspective, to realize different aspects of oneself, and to grow, mature, and all that happy malarkey. Plus, college can be a great place to have some outlandish fun.

-- Anonymous, August 09, 2000


Nope, no doubts at all. But I think maybe I *should* have. I thought my whole life was going to fall into place as soon as I moved into my dorm. Ha. I never thought I'd actually have to DO anything to make my college experience positive and memorable. When I left for school, though, there didn't seem to be anything to worry about. My roommate seemed to be well-adjusted and normal (ha ha. Was I ever wrong on that one!), and I'd be able to come home as often as I needed to, seeing that UGA is only slightly over an hour away from my house. Also, a heck of a lot of people from my graduating class were going to UGA as well, so I figured I'd always have people to hang out with.

-- Anonymous, August 09, 2000

I had doubts about college. But I made them a self fulfilling prophecy and they came true. I wish I had it to do over again so I didn't have it so built up in my mind. So I didn't go into it with such a huge pre-concieved notion of what was going to happen. I went in expecting a cross between Animal House and With Honors and it was as far away from that as it could be. That's what I get for watching too many movies. Anyway, I wanted to share a book I saw at Barnes and Noble because I thought it was really great and I found myself nodding my head along to alot of it. It's called "Been there. (Should've) Done That" by Suzette Tyler. I found myself reading alot of it and going "Yep, I should have done that." Some of it was really obvious like "Go to class, even if you think you know the subject". But there was also some lesser know stuff like "Don't take the bed next to the heater in the dorm, it'll get to hot." I really reccommend it. E.

-- Anonymous, August 09, 2000

Hell no. I couldn't leave fast enough. I was in a big party phase at the time and wanted to get out of my parent's house so I could party even more. I had my own apartment - I had way too much freedom for a 17-year-old. It was a good time in my life and now that it's over I'm glad I experienced it. My sister is moving out this week (she's Class of 2000 too) and she's kind of holding on by her fingernails. I think she's scared of what lies ahead for her; responsibility. I can't empathize with her, so it's hard to talk to her about it, but it's still interesting to watch. I can't imagine not wanting to be on your own, but for her, she's the youngest, so I think she knows that her gravy train is over. That's gotta be scary. It's just been her, my mom and my step-father for 3 years now, I can imagine that it would be daunting. I know she'll do fine though.

-- Anonymous, August 09, 2000

I couldn't wait to go - my only real apprehension was over not being capable of doing the work. Which turned out to be well-founded, as it's what led to me leaving a month later. This was, however, computer science at (what was ranked as) the number one university in the country. Everyone assured me I was able enough, which I believed, but I struggled to find the motivation for something so boring, especially when I was ill all the time.

But nay, I didn't worry about making friends or being able to find my way around or having enough money or living in a nice place or being able to connect to the Internet or whatever. As soon as I arrived and was actually among students, I thought, "Arrrrrgh!" but the feeling quickly passed as the day wore on.

This time, however, I'm (irrationally) really nervous. I'm not sure I'm suited to the course I'm doing, and there's nothing I want less than to have to leave again. I'm not sure I'll be able to summon the energy to do all the work, because an Arts subject relies even more on self-motivation. That or I'll do far too much, because it's been years since I've done a note-taking essay-writing class and with the preliminary reading I've done so far, I've found myself copying out entire pages. I'm worried about making friends, about being given a room without an Internet connection, about not having space for all my junk, about losing touch with my Internet friends, about spending far too much time with my Internet friends, about spending my entire time in a state of confusion trying to sort out my zillion pieces of paper (as I did last year, and even at home), about time going too quickly, arrrrrrrgh!

Being 400 miles away from home, however, doesn't bother me in the slightest. I'm 4000 miles away right now and loving it! So I might not die of panic...

-- Anonymous, August 09, 2000


I didn't go away to college, but I still felt the same kind of insecurity...

I went to a really small high school (think: class of 22), and pretty much hated everyone there. All throughout senior year, I got myself through my days by thinking, "Only __ more days til I leave this hellhole behind!" But then, when I was suddenly thrust into a university with 12,000 people, NONE of which I knew, it was suddenly like, ok, give me the bastards back -- at least I KNEW them. But that feeling went away COMEPLETELY by the end of the first week. By then, I'd met people, who in turn introduced me to other people, etc. That's the great thing about college -- you meet some of the greatest people in the world in the oddest, most unexpected ways. Then after a while, you start to feel like you knew them forever...you then realize you haven't, and it's like, Where WERE you all my life? Hehe.. But seriously, don't worry - everything will work out fine. College is nothing like high school.

-- Anonymous, August 09, 2000



I'm leaving in 5 weeks and I'm terrified, absolutely terrified. I should have gone last year and I was terrified then that I wouldn't make it. This year I'm terrified that I have. Although I'm pretty independant, I've got a nasty feeling that I've made the wrong decision.

And Zed, just to reassure you - you're not going to lose touch with your internet friends. Well, not this internet friend anyway!

-- Anonymous, August 09, 2000


Wooooooooooboy, I was considering *not* going, actually. From orientation right up until my parents left, I didn't want to be there. Then they left, and I unpacked. I realised the next morning that I had forgotten my hairdryer (semi-essential...I have long hair), so I drove home (something I had never done...driving in the Twin Cities....scary {well, at first}!). When I drove back to school, I realised how much I loved being away from home.

Over time, I met people, I loved my classes, my dorm, everything. Oh, I love college, and I cannot WAIT to go back. I can't believe I almost didn't go -- what was I thinking?

-- Anonymous, August 09, 2000


I didn't have any doubts at all before college, but they definitely sunk in after a few weeks. I was already living away from home for the summer, but that was completely different than having random roommates and a dorm filled with alcoholic sophmores. And being at a state college with a large sorority/fraternity population, along with all the people from high school I didn't really feel like seeing pop up in *all* my places. And ... and lots of other little issues I won't go into, for the sake of all those college-bound! I like my school a lot now, if that's any consolation; it just took a while to find the niche everyone insisted there was for me. I think community service organizations are a great way to get involved; for example Habitat for Humanity or school tutoring programs, whatever you like. I also don't recommend spending all your evenings sending horribly long e-mails to all your pre-college friends ranting about college life. It can be difficult but I think you gain a lot of emotional strength from plotting your own course, whatever it may be. Good luck!

-- Anonymous, August 09, 2000

The first time I went away to college, I had so many doubts that I ended up buying a comforter that wasn't a comforter, but a rinky dinky bedspread thing that was ONLY for show and not a very good show at that. I hated the sight of it every time I saw it, including when the salesperson was ringing it up.

It had a lot to do with my dropping out.

But I'm back in school now and I have good bedclothes, too. Everything works out for the best.

-- Anonymous, August 09, 2000


Well... I basically live in a utopia at home--Madison, WI. It's the only place I've ever known and I love the city to death. I was the only one of my friends who was going out of state and faaaaar.. all the way to (gasp) Ohio for school. I was pretty okay most of the summer, but when time came nearer, I kept telling myself that I'd *still* be okay, even when I knew I couldn't just leave so easily. My mind played funny tricks on me one night when I was at a party..and I only remember waking up in my best friend's arms sobbing and saying, "I can't move all the way to Ohio. I can't go. I'll never make it." and him reassuring me that if anyone of us could, I could. I'd have to say that I had way more doubts once I got there. The first four weeks were splendid..and then I woke up one morning and said to myself, "Is this all college is? Because if so, I can just move back home and do it there..." Thankfully, time is a wondrous invention. . :) You'll be just swell, Katie. I know it. :)

-- Anonymous, August 09, 2000


Man, I wish I could have that feeling back again. I was nervous but really excited. I was moving away from home and I knew I had a lot of growing up to do. It was only about 4 hours away, but it felt like a long ways.

I just wish I'd been brave enough to transfer my sophomore year to a school even further away. I stayed in state and went to a school with a not-so-great reputation BUT I had some amazing classes. I had a class with only 4 other students my freshman year. Be grateful for AP credits. =) Of course, it was a fairly esoteric upper-class level German class, but it was the 5 of us. ;)

Tips? Bring everything. Don't think you can 'do without' things because you'll be wanting a TV, stereo, and computer of your own. Bring a fan. Bring your books. It's really important to have your STUFF around when you don't know anyone. =) Oh dang it. I had a good tip. Oh wait, there it is. Don't take an 8 am class! Even if you figure you started school at 8 in high school, just don't do it! =) I went to class twice a week (out of 5 days) and earned a 2.0. My lowest grade in ANY CLASS. I retook the class and bumped it up to a 3.6 but still! It was all about the timing. It screwed me out of being on the Dean's List every term. Not that it's that big of a deal, but it looks impressive on grad school applications. =)

Anyway, I'll shut up now. =)

-- Anonymous, August 10, 2000


I'm leaving on the 19th. I'm not having concrete, major doubts --- just more of a vague fright. I visited the place during spring break and had very mixed feelings when I pictured myself living there, trying to make friends there, majoring in English there. Nothing there particularly made me look forward to attending that college, which is worrisome.

So now that I'm definitely attending ... I found myself thinking for the past 2 weeks that it would have been nice to just attend a local college here in town. ("Nice." Good grief. I would run into the exact same wolfpacks of people from my high school. I mean, I feel queasy and claustrophobic just thinking about it.)

It's probably just the distance --- I live on the West Coast, and the college is in Wisconsin. I think it's safe to say that I'm just less than enthused about the whole deal.

-- Anonymous, August 10, 2000


I have to say that I had very little doubts. Unlike a lot of people, I wanted a really big change. (I moved from California to Washington, DC) I wanted out of my boring town, and my mom and I had stopped getting along the day that I turned 13. I had a few doubts about my roommates, and about whether or not I would be able to find people who didn't want to get drunk every weekend. (Little did I know that I would be one of the people getting drunk every weekend. I would recommend NOT doing that, although I was careful not to let fun interfere with my grades)

I'd have to say that the best thing to do is go into the year with an open mind. Realize that you will either love your roommate(s) (I'm still living with two of my three freshman year roommates) or HATE your roommate(s). (I haven't spoken to my third roommate since the wonderful day she moved out) And realize that you will find yourself doing things that you may not have expected. I find it's best to sort of roll with the punches. And not schedule classes too early. :-)

--Lissa

-- Anonymous, August 10, 2000


Okay, I have no idea what other people are saying on this thread, because I had to jump right in and answer. I am getting ready to move to San Francisco to go to grad school and I am having major, MAJOR doubts. "Is this a huge fat mistake? Is this career going to go anywhere? Is this debt going to be worth it? Where will I live?"

Yes. My answer is yes.

-- Anonymous, August 10, 2000


I think its more of a mixture of doubt with one of excitement. It's funny, the friends you made in highschool may stick with your or leave, but the ones you make in college are so much different. You get to know people so well in such a short period of time that it seems like you've known them forever. I ended up living in an apartment in Boston with 6 girls my sophomore year and while it did have its negatives (ie. people borrowing clothes, cat fights...) it was one of the greatest experiences of my life. I found out that school wasn't for me due to the size of the classes, but 4 years later and ready to graduate from another school, those friendships i made freshman year in college are just as strong.

-- Anonymous, August 11, 2000

When I left for Penn State, I felt like my head was going to explode. Literally. I know that my roommate wouldn't be there for the first 2 nights and that I wouldn't know ANYBODY. I made my mom and step-dad stay until the wee hours of the night (well, like 10)and I ended up getting coffee with my neighbors. The neighbors I met that night turned out to be the best friends I had during the semester. My roommate was a bit of a kook, but oh well...I got over it. And I didn't feel like my head was going to explode anymore.

I was also VERY nervous about being "accepted". I'm certainly not Miss Normality, and I was convinced that PSU would be nothing but Abercrombie and Fitch drones. There are a LOT of those, but if you look in the right places, you'll find some very cool people. And a lot of body piercings.

-- Anonymous, August 11, 2000


I worried a lot that I wouldn't like my roommates (I didn't, but they moved out and I got better ones), that I wouldn't make any friends (but I did), that I wouldn't like my major (I didn't, so I changed it), that I wouldn't be able to force myself to work and would flunk out and live in a box (I've been on the Dean's List for the 4 semesters I've been in college)... And most of this worry was concentrated into my last month or so at home; up until then, I was really excited. And I remained excited; I just got worried, too. I had a really good freshman year, though. I just tried not to worry about stuff I couldn't change, and the stuff that I could, I did.

-- Anonymous, August 11, 2000

Ack, you all won't have half of the doubts that I'll have. Think about going to college in another country? I'm not having doubts right now, because I have one more year until I leave. But I can just see it now. I know I won't regret going, but it's going to take a lot of adjusting to do.

-- Anonymous, August 11, 2000

wow, how cool. I'd love to attend college in another country, but can't afford to. What country are you going to study in, Camille?

-- Anonymous, August 12, 2000

i had a few friends who started college while i was a senior in high school and they absolutely hated their experiences during freshman year so i went into the thing with very little expectations, and hence, no doubts. i just decided to take things as they came...

what happened was: my roomates were okay for the most part (but got annoying about my online journal and my occasional cigarette in _my_ room), classes weren't too hard and the work wasn't too overwhelming; any bad grades i got were a result of my laziness and procrastinating ways. it really is all about time management, you know. and like someone else said, when i was in high school, i was worried that i wouldn't meet anyone who wasn't really into drinking/drugs, and then i went to college, and lo and behold, i turn into one of those weekend partyers. i had fun, though, and that is the important part.

-- Anonymous, August 13, 2000

Hopefully I'll be moving to Costa Rica by the end of July of 2001. I can't wait. The universities are really good down there, and I speak spanish so it's perfect. I also went there for a month this summer and I loved it to death. It'll be difficult to adjust to things, but I can deal with it. It'll be an adventure :)

-- Anonymous, August 13, 2000

Black Francis aka Frank Black (of the Pixes, duh) went to school in Costa Rica, I think (as a UMass exchange student). And he is the man. Buy Doolittle and Surfer Rosa to take with you.

-dan

-- Anonymous, August 15, 2000


right on.

-- Anonymous, August 18, 2000

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