TEN REASONS WHY DAVID GINOLA SIGNED FOR ASTON VILLA:

1) No stranger to making outrageous demands for his services, he thought they were offering him a villa.

2) There is a certain cachet of being Birmingham's most glamorous resident - Ever.

3) Unable to engineer a transfer to Spain, home of the bullfight, David has settled for Birmingham, home of the Bullring.

4) Sun-worshipping, beach-loving David asked John Gregory if there was "any sea." Imagine the tantrum that will follow David's first, highly anti-climactic trip to the National Exhibition Centre!

5) Having made a career out of taking theatrical tumbles under the slightest of challenges, it was time for his career to take a dive.

6) L'Oreal persuaded him to go, saying that he could be their foothold in a huge, untapped new market. There's big money to be made by the company that introduces grooming products to the West Midlands!!!

7) When he heard that they were looking for "the new Beni", huge Crossroads fan David just had to go up to Brum to audition.

8) Dion "Big? It's Magnificent" Dublin is there to continue the tradition, started by Spurs' Chris Armstrong, of Ginola featuring in a side with a monumental knob up front.

9) Having exhausted all the fashionable continental restaurants in London, Ginola wanted to sample this Spaghetti Junction everyone talks about.

10) Exasperated with the French ace's Champagne Charlie ways, George Graham threatened to send him to Coventry, Daveed opted for nearby Brum; 'At least Birmingham's got an international airport,' reasoned Ginola, signing on the line which is dotted.

-- Anonymous, August 03, 2000

Answers

...and the only reason Villa signed Ginola is that he is the closest thing to a european trophy that they are ever going to see at Villa Park...especially after Celta Vigo.

-- Anonymous, August 03, 2000

The Spurs fans are in turmoil and bite very easily, take a look Pond life of the football fan world

-- Anonymous, August 04, 2000

Spurs fan have always been first class whingers, but they're reaching new depths now judging from that lot. I can't imagine it comes as any suprise to Sugar or Graham that selling Ginola would upset a few but I'd willingly exchange him for Rebrov, Sullivan and Ben 'Mackem Mauler' Thatcher.

-- Anonymous, August 04, 2000

And I thought NUFC's official board was bad. yipes!

Love the 10 reasons... :-)

-- Anonymous, August 04, 2000

Found this on the Spurs-update site.

Refunds for Ginola fans Friday 4th August, 09:25 SPURS HAVE announced that they will refund season tickets for those who do not wish to commit themselves to matches now that Ginola has left.

Apparently there have been plenty of letters from embittered supporters who claim that they wouldn't have purchased season tickets if they'd known that the main source of entertainment in the side was leaving.

"Quotes from fans stating they would not have bought a season ticket if they knew David Ginola was going has highlighted to the board a genuine possibility that this scenario may exist."

"Any fan wishing to return their season ticket may do so by August 15, whereby a full refund will be given. The club would not like to feel that any of its fans have been misled."

So there you have it, it would be interesting to know how many they end up refunding.....I'll bet it's not actually that many. I wonder if they'll do the same for fans whose shiny new away shirt turned up in this morning's post with Ginola 14 on.

-- Anonymous, August 04, 2000

Speaking of which I was most impressed with Coventy's Mustapha Hadji over shirts. Apparently he offered to pay out of his own pocket to all Sky Blue fans who'd forked out on a Hadji-shirt before he changed his squad number. Nice gesture.

-- Anonymous, August 04, 2000

Ah Stevo, that would be the Hadji way and shirt man wouldn't it?

-- Anonymous, August 04, 2000