Testing Tables

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Testing The Tables Feature in HTML
Cool Sad
Coffee Tea
Bentley Rhythm Ace Mariah Carey

-- (this.is@test.only), July 27, 2000


Got this in an email today. Thought this forum could use it.

Close your eyes.....And go back in time....
Before the Internet or the MAC,
Before semiautomatics and crack
Before SEGA or Super Nintendo...
Way back........
I'm talking about hide and seek at dusk.
The Good Humor man, Red light, green light.
The corner store.

Hopscotch, butterscotch, doubledutch, jacks, kickball, dodgeball.
Mother May I?
Red Rover and Roly Poly.
Hula Hoops.
Running through the sprinkler.
The smell of the sun and licking salty lips....

Wax lips and mustaches.
An ice cream cone on a warm summer night.
Chocolate or vanilla or strawberry or maybe butter pecan.
A cherry coke from the fountain at the corner drug store.

Watching Saturday Morning cartoons ... short commercials
Fat Albert, Road Runner, He-Man, The Three Stooges, and Bugs,
Or staying up for Gunsmoke

Or back further, listening to Superman on the radio

When around the corner seemed far away,
And going downtown seemed like going somewhere.

A million mosquito bites.
Sticky fingers.
Cops and Robbers, Cowboys and Indians, Zorro.
Climbing trees, Building igloos out of snow banks.
Walking to school, no matter what the weather.
Running till you were out of breath.
Laughing so hard that your stomach hurt.

Jumping on the bed. Pillow fights.
Spinning around, getting dizzy and falling down was cause for giggles.
Being tired from playing.... Remember that?

The worst embarrassment was being picked last for a team.
War was a card game.
Water balloons were the ultimate weapon.
Baseball cards in the spokes transformed any bike into a motorcycle.

I'm not finished just yet...
Eating Kool-Aid powder.

Remember when...
There were two types of sneakers for girls and boys (Keds & PF Flyers) and the only time you wore them at school was for "gym."
It wasn't odd to have two or three "best" friends.
When nobody owned a purebred dog.
When a quarter was a decent allowance and another quarter a miracle.
When milk went up one cent and everyone talked about it for weeks?
When you'd reach into a muddy gutter for a penny.

When you got your windshield cleaned, oil checked, and gas pumped, without asking, for free, every time. And, you didn't pay for air.
And, you got trading stamps to boot!
When laundry detergent had free glasses, dishes or towels hidden inside the box.

When nearly everyone's Mom was at home when the kids got there.
When it took five minutes for the TV to warm up, if you even had one.
When your Mom wore nylons that came in two pieces.
It was magic when dad would "remove" his thumb.

When it was considered a great privilege to be taken out to dinner at a real restaurant with your parents.

When girls neither dated nor kissed until late High School, if then.
When all of your male teachers wore neckties and female teachers had their hair done.

When any parent could discipline any kid or feed him or use him to carry groceries, and nobody, not even the kid, thought a thing of it.

When they threatened to keep kids back a grade if they failed ... and did!
When being sent to the principal's office was nothing compared to the fate that awaited a misbehaving student at home.

Basically, we were in fear for our lives but it wasn't because of drive-by shootings, drugs, gangs, etc.
Our parents and grandparents were a much bigger threat!
And some of us are still afraid of them!!!

Didn't that feel good just to go back and say,
"Yeah, I remember that!"

Remember when............

Decisions were made by going "eenie-meenie-miney-mo."
Mistakes were corrected by simply exclaiming, "do over!"
"Race issue" meant arguing about who ran the fastest.
Money issues were handled by whoever was the banker in "Monopoly."
The worst thing you could catch from the opposite sex was cooties.
It was unbelievable that dodgeball wasn't an Olympic event.
Having a weapon in school meant being caught with a slingshot.
Nobody was prettier than Mom.
Scrapes and bruises were kissed and made better.
Taking drugs meant orange-flavored chewable aspirin.
Ice cream was considered a basic food group.
Getting a foot of snow was a dream come true.
Abilities were discovered because of a "double-dog-dare."

Older siblings were the worst tormentors, but also the fiercest protectors.

If you can remember most or all of these then you have LIVED!!!!
Pass this on to anyone who may need a break from his or her "grown up" life...


-- (testing@gain.here), January 25, 2001.

"Many a gem , of purest ray , serene the deep , dark , unfathomed caves of oceans bear.

Many a flower , blooms to blush unseen and waste it's freshness on desert air ."

- - - anon

I think your file fits into that category .

For your amusement :


-- russ conner (carcomp@qwest.net), February 04, 2001.

02 06 01


I love to argue with right-wingers. I don't know why. It isn't good for my blood pressure, and it brings out the nasty, hateful side of me which I'm generally able to squelch, but there's something about it that's almost irresistible. Kind of like poking a sore tooth - it's painful, but you just can't keep yourself from pushing on it.

I'll admit that one of the draws is that it's so easy to win an argument with them. Their biggest defense is some variation of "He/she/they/it/you started it!", and once you get them to that point, you know they're out of ammunition. Generally, this takes about five minutes, depending on the argument.

I also love to debate, but I don't know if I'd enjoy debating a right-winger because I've yet to find a right-winger willing to debate anything. Argue? Sure. Debate? Nah. If I'd had opponents like the right-wingers I encounter on message boards (or the mouthpieces on TV) back when I was on my high school debate team, I'd've won the state championship hands down.

Republicans have two basic methods of arguing. One is the "He started it!" methodology; the other is what I like to call the "barking dog strategery" (in honor of Dubya).

You can always tell when the right-wingers on message boards have been faithfully memorizing every word that slithers out of Rush Limbaugh's mouth, because they all begin to sound like drones. Their basic message? Everything liberals - especially liberals named Clinton - ever do or even think of doing is bad. Because of this, everything Republicans do is good. You can't blame Republicans for anything, because liberals are bad, mean people.

You'd think this line of reasoning wouldn't be the least bit effective, and yet the ditto-heads give every appearance of believing wholeheartedly in its power. After all, the rhetoric about votes having been counted twenty-seven times (or however many times they claimed the uncounted votes had been counted) really caught on with the Bush supporters. When I was at a protest in late November, a middle-aged fellow who looked relatively normal (so much for my judgment) approached me and said in a dangerously quiet voice: "How many times do you want the votes to be counted?" He didn't respond at ALL well to my cheery reply of "Just once would be really great!", and began yelling "They've been counted and re-counted and re-re-counted!" The poor schlub actually seemed to BELIEVE what he was saying, and since I'm a Pollyanna at heart who will never learn that some people just prefer to live in ignorance, I made the mistake of trying to enlighten him. The result was awfully similar to what happens when I try to calmly yet firmly tell my dog to stop barking. "They haven't actually all been counted--" "They've been counted three times!" "No, what I'm trying to say-" "They've been counted and re-re-re-counted!" "Well, but they haven't, and here's why--" "They've been counted five times!" "SOME of the votes have been recounted, but there are others--" "They've all been counted six times!"

I did manage to finally get rid of the barking fellow at the protest (I think he was up to eight vote counts by the time he wandered away to find solace with his fellow Bushies), but, of course, have had to listen to the same routine from every right-wing pundit and talk show guest. Sean Hannity is my favorite barking dog; he even went off on the "re-re-re-count" mantra last night on Hannity & Colmes, when Doug Hattaway was trying to explain why so many Democrats are still angry (Way to go, Doug!). Hannity didn't have quite the energy he used to, though...there was a silly grin on his face as he repeated "The votes were counted", and I suspect he's realizing - in light of the fact that Gore's picking up more votes in Florida's media-sponsored vote-count with every passing day - just how stupid he sounds.

When the "barking dog strategery" doesn't work, Republicans move on to the "He started it!" defense. This is the very foundation of the right-wing philosophy - they can't really defend or justify anything they do (and don't particularly want to), and they have never developed any sort of moral code, so they have to rely on the actions of Democrats to determine what is acceptable and what isn't. If a Republican does anything which is in any way, shape or form reminiscent of something a liberal did or might have done in the past, then the Republican can't be blamed - in fact, he should be praised! To illustrate this philosophy, I will repeat a conversation I had recently with a fellow named Irf. Irf is my imaginary Republican friend - I'd happily repeat a conversation I had with a REAL Republican friend, but I don't have any Republican friends.

ME: Hey, Irf. Do you ever wonder what Dubya did while he was AWOL from the National Guard?

IRF: Oh, yeah, like Clinton had a great military record.

ME: But do you ever wonder what Dubya did while--

IRF: And Al Gore likes to brag about having gone to Vietnam, but he was just a journalist.

ME: But about Dubya--

IRF: You liberals are amazing. You fall all over yourselves worshipping a draft-dodger, then have the nerve to criticize someone who actually served.

ME: But the point is that Dubya DIDN'T serve. He slithered into a cushy spot in the National Guard and then didnt bother to show up.

IRF: Well, Clinton sure as hell didn't serve - he was a draft-dodging son-of-a-bitch.

ME: Hmm. Let's talk about the cocaine. Does it bother you that there are so many rumours about Dubya being a coke-sniffer?

IRF: Al Gore was a pothead.

ME: I think most people were potheads of one degree or another during the Vietnam War. And you're right; Al Gore smoked pot, though I don't think he was a "pothead". Anyway, that doesn't really bother me. Are you saying it doesn't bother you that Dubya used cocaine?

IRF: You hypocrite! Gore was a pothead!

ME: But about Dubya--

IRF: You've got some nerve making vile insinuations about Bush's youthful indiscretions when you worship at the feet of a draft dodger and a pothead!

ME: So you think Bush WAS a cokehead?

IRF: All you liberals ever do is make sleazy attacks against people. You're so disgusting. Just like that pothead Al Gore. I'll bet you're a pothead, too.
Why don't you find something constructive to do, instead of making personal attacks?

ME: Um, YOU'RE making personal attacks, you know. I mean, feel free, but--

IRF: Like you've never made a personal attack? Gimme a break.

When I first started posting on political message boards, I was under the mistaken impression that their ridiculous style of "debate" was limited to the masses. But it didn't take long before I realized that ALL Republicans argue this way. Just watch the talk shows on CNN, MSNBC or FOX. Bush's tax cut goes primarily to the upper 1%? Not an issue - look at the pardon Clinton gave to Rich! (I'm not sure what that has to do with tax cuts, but Bob Novak seemed to think he'd scored a touchdown when he made that particular comeback). Most Republicans seem to be opposed to campaign finance reform? Yeah, but Clinton got a lot of gifts when he left the White House - next? Bush doesn't seem to have much support among African-Americans? Ha! Gore didn't have many African-Americans among his staff! John Ashcroft lied during the confirmation hearings? Bah! Clinton lied about sex! Etc., etc., etc.

Really, in the end, you have to feel sorry for right-wingers. They're trying to defend the indefensible. Can you blame them for resorting to schoolyard tactics? If they couldn't fall back on the comfortable, tried-and-true "He started it!" defense, they'd be left to stutter and stammer as badly as Dubya did when a Democrat asked him recently why he felt faith-based organizations wouldn't use federal money to proselytize, but foreign family planning clinics couldn't be trusted with it because they might mention the word 'abortion'.

I wonder how well the "He started it!" technique would work for us. You think we could hogtie every registered Republican in the country on every Election Day, and not release them til all the polls were closed, and then explain to the world that it was okay because Dubya started it?

Hey, I'm game.

-- Cherri (jessam5@home.com), February 22, 2001.

Not a city, but a lake Lake Bled in Slovenia

-- test (test@test.com), December 12, 2001.

-- wefwe (asdf@123.com), August 10, 2002.

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